Early this year, France's failure to kowtow to the U.S. on Iraq triggered a huge wave of French bashing. And to judge from this Tom Friedman column, French bashing's still going strong. Which is too bad, because just in case George Bush hasn't noticed, it's probably time to make nice.
So I offer the French Fall Guy Song. Feel free to sing it to "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair," from South Pacific, by Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein II. To use this midi link, scroll down to "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair" (near the top of the right-hand column in the Bill Basham - Piano Solos section) and play it twice.
Bush wants to wash the French right out of his hair.
Old Europe France does things he simply can't bear.
If only France was out of George Bush's hair.
He'd always get his way.
It's France's fault that Saddam never disarmed.
It's France's fault that U.S. soldiers were harmed.
It's France's fault that Bush can't find Iraq arms.
The French are in the way.
Must punish Paris louts.
Shout them down, kick them out.
Frenchies are yellow clowns.
Don't deserve veto clout.
Banish them.
They've got to go.
French boycott!
The times the French guys brush or bathe are too rare.
It's all their fault that we're a quagmire ensnared.
Their U.N. votes are mean and always unfair.
The French should have no say.
How dare they block our war, then ask for a share
In Iraq deals? French gall is too much to bear.
They sip their wine, eat brie, and mess with Bush guerre.
The French have got to pay.
That damn Chirac caused Dubya all kinds of harm.
Without Chirac Bush would have gotten Saddam.
And found his weapons cache without using bombs.
While shouting "Make my day!"
Must punish Paris louts.
Shout them down, kick them out.
Frenchies are yellow clowns.
Don't deserve veto clout.
Banish them.
They've got to go.
French boycott!
Bush needs a fall guy, one the public can share.
Though France was right, and Bush was wrong, so who cares?
How Dubya'd love to seize its U.N. "Non!" chair.
And send France on its way.
