Dubya's Early White House Daze -- Week 32   This Week  Last Week  Archives  Main  Home

August 28, 2001

Dear Diary -- I'm real sad bout havin ta leave the ranch soon & head up ta DC. But Karl promised I won't haveta do mucha that borin governin. Instead I'm gonna mostly do my PR offensive charm thing all round the country. Or at least the parts that voted fer me.

I was worried it was gonna be lots more pretendin to be green & into readin like those annoyin brie & cheese eatin coastal types. But instead my main message is gonna be that the smaller budget surplus is incredibly positive news cause it strangles Congress & puts em in a straightjacket right where they belong.

I'm also sposeta convince the People that after all the money goes to the Military & there's nothin left fer health & other stuff without spendin the SS surplus it's Congress's fault fer goin off on a spendin spree.

I'm worried this is gonna be a tuff sell -- that people'll buy the damn Dems claim that the lower surplus is my own rich tax lowerin fault. But Karl said they'll be too busy spendin their $600 checks ta notice it's true.

And Ari told me if I get asked hard questions & get lost pretendin to answer, all I haveta do is distract em. Makin fun of reporters fer bein bald works real good!

August 30, 2001

Dear Diary -- I really like our new ad -- the one that brags bout my sendin money back ta taxpayers ta get Clinton's saggin economy growin again. The best part is we're runnin it in Daschle's & Gephard's home states. I bet it's drivin em crazy!

Serves em right fer accusin me a fiscal mismanagement. I got me an MBA, so if anybody knows how ta fiscal mismanage it's me.

Besides, how do those lyin, hypocritical Dems spect me ta set a new bipartisan, civil tone in Washington when they keep attackin the Leader of the Free World?

All they do is bitch & moan bout my breakin into that stupid lockbox & raidin Medicare. Who cares what they think?

Hmm, I just reread what I wrote & maybe I got a little carried away. But I got a good excuse -- I'm stuck headin back ta DC today. Plus I just got bad news from one a them arbolistic arbotree guys -- Mother Nature's likely ta mess up the trails I cleared fer Laura & maybe even wash em away.

I made him promise not ta tell her cause she'll be real mad. Anyway, how do I know if what he said is sound science? He isn't even a Republican!

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