Dubya's Early White House Daze -- Week 27   This Week  Last Week  Archives  Main  Home

July 23, 2001

Dear Diary -- I made it thru another one! The G7/8 thing went real good and the press weren't even mean to me this time. They were too busy talkin bout the dead guy.

The other leaders were upset bout that demon strator bein killed. But it seems like to me that's the risk you take fer pretendin to represent the poor when you're not. And fer abusin the 1st amendment.

Of course there was the usual gangin up on me bout Kyoto, especially by Chirac. But what do you expect from a fellow who's traumatized just cause someone he doesn't even know gets killed?

He kept pressurin the others to stick to the protocon, even tho it's bad for the US economy which, as I told em many times, is bad for the whole world. But even tho I believe I did a real good job tellin em how strong my beliefs are bout my beliefs, they kept tryin to change em.

At one point the pressure got so bad, I accidentally promised an alternate Kyoto plan by October even tho it's not happenin. But Ari fixed things right up by sayin I didn't.

But the main thing is I got thru it without saying anything substantial. Reagan woulda been prouda me!

July 24, 2001

Dear Diary -- Meetin the Pope sure was scary! Especially since I had to sit real still the whole time & try not to make any faces.

I must say he's the most awe-strikin man I ever met -- chock filled with depth & convictions & principals. And even more profane than I expected!

But I sure wish he hadn't surprised me by bringin up stem cell research & callin it infantile. My decision's tuff enuff without him puttin his 2 cents in. No matter what I do, it'll cost me votes!!!

I had a much easier time talkin to Berlusconi. He even praised me fer bein frank & direct & said that with me everything's simple. And that I don't beat round the bush even tho I am one.

July 25, 2001

Dear Diary -- It turns out my Popial etiquette lessons didn't take too well -- I called the Pope Sir by accident insteada Your Holiness. Hey, he's lucky I didn't call him Your Popitude!

Yesterday I gave a troop boosting speech in Kosovo. I expressed my preciation, tellin em Thanks to you, there will be elections here in November -- elections where we want to see the widest-possible participation. As long as they're all Republicans -- hahaha!!

I hadda act friendlylike, so I ate in the messy hall. And after all that fancy G8 food, I had a yen for peanut butter & jelly. But I'm tryin to lose a coupla pounds so I don't turn into Gore. So instead I only ate macaroni & cheese & fried chicken.

Anyway, I sure am glad to be back in the USA, even if it's not the ranch. Altho I was in a better mood before I found out Laura's poll ratings are much higher than mine. It's not fair -- all she hasta do is be married to me!

And keep Barbara from wearin jeans when she visits the Queen.

July 27, 2001

Dear Diary -- Saddam & his rogues are makin trouble again, shootin at our planes & tryin to make me look bad. So Rummy says we gotta consider military action. I told him exercise your best COO judgment & let me know what you decide. Just don't mess up my vacation!

This proves what I've been sayin all along -- Russia isn't our enemy -- Iraq's our enemy. Plus Saddam's a menace and a problem and a very very bad man.

Except right now I'm pretty PO'd at Putin too. First me & him have a surprise agreement to agree bout an agreement. Then the next thing I know he pulls a switcheroo & there's no breakthru. I hate when people say one thing to my face & another to my back.

To add injury to insult, then he says we both support the fundamental principals of the ABM Treaty. And that negotiatin takes time cause a lotta people haveta agree. I guess he'd liketa be dictator too.

But my gal Condy Arroz fixed him real good. She told him sooner's better then later & we're not waitin fer Russia to start doin our missle defensive thing. And that I don't support the fundamental principals of nothin!

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