Yikes! Trump’s proposed budget pays for his pet wall by raiding the TSA, FEMA, and Coast Guard budgets.
Remember Trump’s thunderous call
For a Mexico-financed “great wall?”
Coast Guard funds, FEMA cash,
And the TSA stash–
Trump will slash them to build it. What gall!
Are you feeling more secure yet?
This TSA incident surely takes the cake:
A woman says an airport security officer in Las Vegas confiscated her frosted cupcake because he thought the icing on it could be explosive.
It seems the TSA agent told her the cupcake’s “frosting was ‘gel-like’ enough to constitute a security risk.”
TSA Rules Still Don’t Gel (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The TSA rules must be eased
Cuz a cupcake in Vegas was seized.
And when icing on cakes
Is deemed fishy, it makes
All the TSA guys look diseased.
My open limerick to the traveling public was inspired by this article about gynecological pat-downs and this letter from physicist Rep. Rush Holt, which questions the safety of full body scan technology:
An Open Limerick To Airline Passengers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Airline riders, it’s time to speak out.
The TSA rules we must flout.
Radiation or mauling —
They both are appalling.
To submit gives the terrorists clout.
(You can find my Pat-Down Put-Down limerick here.)
Sorry I’ve been so quiet lately. But I have a great excuse: Mark and I went on the first annual Lewis Black Comedy Cruise. You can read all about our fun comedy cruise adventures here.
But now it’s time to get back to the work of political mockery. Fortunately, I’ve returned from my travels just in time to make fun of the TSA’s delightful new privacy-invading screening procedures. And I’m still trying to figure out which I prefer as my ticket to plane boarding: a “nude body scan or genital groping.”
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Pat-Down Put-Down
By Madeleine Begun Kane
You’re a teen and can’t get to first base?
You’re a fondler, but fearful of Mace?
Well a pat-down career
Can be yours. (Front and rear.)
Be a TSA Feel-Her-Up Ace.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her non-political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
