No relief bill this month, on reflection,
Cuz the Senate’s sole job’s my selection
For our land’s highest bench.
Judge Amy’s a wench
Who has earned my support and affection.
Justice Ginsburg’s birthday is coming up on March 15th, and I couldn’t resist writing her a limerick. In fact, I even snail-mailed her a copy. Remember snail-mail?
Here it is:
Happy birthday dear Ruth. You’re the best!
You have met ev’ry challenge and test
With zest, brains, and class,
Plus just enough brass…
While the President feathers his nest.
How many lies can a candidate tell
Before you call him a sham?
How many times must Brett K lose control
Before Lindsey Graham tells him, “Scram!”?
Yes,’n’ how many beers must a nominee drink
Before he blacks out an assault?
The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind.
The answer is blowin’ in the wind.
A fellow named Brett, nicknamed “Bart”
Apparently thinks he’s so smart;
He feels free to pretend
“Bart O’Kavanaugh” penned
By his friend ain’t “Bart” K at its heart.
The Week: “Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) said Wednesday that the Senate will ‘vote to confirm’ the successor of outgoing Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy ‘this fall,’ adding that ‘it’s imperative that the president’s nominee be treated fairly.'”
Mitch McConnell says Dems must be fair
When it’s time to fill Kennedy’s chair.
Forget fairness; send coal
To the Leader who stole
Our great Court. Tell that thief “This is guerre!”
There is NO Muslim ban, and Dem tears
Are fake and deserve all our sneers!
And how dare they deplore such
A great guy as Gorsuch!
If they block him, I’ll nuke their careers!
Prez Obama, the way they’ve behaved
Means the Senate has tacitly waived
Its advice/consent right
Re Judge Garland, so fight
And appoint him. That seat can be saved.
Sure the Senate will probably sue
And deem it some sort of a coup.
But it’s still wise to try,
Cuz the courts may just buy
Your contention. It’s worth the ado.
“Like many of my Senate colleagues, I recently met with Chief Judge Merrick Garland, President Obama’s nominee to the Supreme Court. … Our meeting, however, does not change my conviction that the Senate should consider a Supreme Court nominee after this presidential election cycle,” Hatch wrote in an op-ed published on the website of the Deseret News early Thursday morning and later removed. It remains available in a Google database.
Dear Orrin, it isn’t a race
To report on a meeting you’ll face.
And it’s best not to claim
It did NOT change your game
When that meeting has yet to take place.
Dear Mitch, you must stop the obstruction
And your anti-Obama production.
A new Justice is needed.
It’s time that you heeded
Your duties. You MUST all this muck shun.
In the midst of the Davis dissension
And her quest for gay marriage prevention,
Huck delivered this plea:
Don’t jail Davis. Jail ME!
It’s the only way Huck gets attention.
A thrice-divorced clerk known as Kim
Seems to wed and divorce on a whim.
But this bigoted broad
Claims on orders from “God”
That she can’t let a guy wed a “him.”
Though I already wrote an Antonin Scalia limerick today, I’m itching for more. So I composed these song parody lyrics to the tune of “Maria.”
Now Scalia/Maria does sound obvious. So I’m surely not the first to use “Maria” to parody Scalia. But I don’t want to do a Google search, lest I be inadvertently influenced by someone else’s lyrics.
And with that disclaimer out of the way, here’s my parody:
Scalia,
The jiggery-pok’ry Scalia,
Treats justice like a game,
The worst judge I can name, you see.
Scalia,
The wingnutty jurist, Scalia,
Demands the final word
With phrases so absurd, to me.
Scalia,
When he loses a case, he’s sulking,
And his presence is always so hulking.
Scalia,
The nastiest Justice, Scalia.
Scalia, Scalia, Scalia, etc.
Scalia,
Pitches disses, instead of reason,
Disagreements with him — treats like treason.
If you follow the U.S. Supreme Court, you know that Justice Scalia ended the term by hurling some colorful, spoiled-bratty insults at his fellow judges. His behavior was so over-the-top, that Slate created The Antonin Scalia “Sick Burn” Generator, an insult creator packed with Scalia-isms.
This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?
Using lingo arcane and absurd,
Scalia must have the last word:
Gives “the bird” to his peers
With “pure apple sauce” jeers
He’s a “jiggery-pokery” turd.
Supreme Surprise (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The SCOTUS has caused quite a din
Over gay marriage rights. Is it sin
Or just fine for the states
To say gays can be mates?
Its response is “We shouldn’t mix in.”
Happy 225th birthday to the U.S. Supreme Court! (On Sept. 24, 1789 President George Washington signed the
Judiciary Act of 1789, which created a Supreme Court with six justices.)
Happy Birthday To The Supremes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Seems today marks the birth of a court,
The court of supreme last resort.
Chief Justice John Jay
Ran it back in the day.
I just wish it would do what it ort.
I can’t help wondering whether Supreme Court Justice Scalia says weird things like this just for attention:
Speaking at the University of Tennessee College of Law on Tuesday, the longest-serving justice currently on the bench was asked by a student about the constitutionality of the income tax, the Knoxville News Sentinel reports.
Scalia responded that the government has the right to implement the tax, “but if it reaches a certain point, perhaps you should revolt.”
Limerick Ode To Antonin Scalia
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Suggesting that students revolt
Over taxes ain’t very adult.
It seems doltish Scalia
Has mouth diarrhea.
I surmise that his brain’s short a bolt.
Limerick Ode To Antonin Scalia
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Scalia gave quite the recital
With that “racial entitlement” title
He “bestowed” on the vote,
Fearing Dem voter bloat:
To Scalia, such voters ain’t vital.
