Headline of the Day: Huckabee Backs Denying Abortion To 10-Year-Old Raped By Stepfather.
When a ten-year-old’s raped, you would think
That not even a wingnut would sink
To abortion denial.
But Huck with a smile
Makes a make-her-deliver-law stink.
Every time I think Republicans couldn’t possibly get crazier or more extreme about banning abortion, someone like Indiana’s Richard Mourdoch proves me wrong.
By now, the would-be senator’s bizarre comments about abortion and rape, and his non-apology apology are all too familiar. So is the fact that Romney has refused to withdraw his endorsement and his pro-Mourdoch ad.
So I’ll simply leave you with this serious limerick:
Limerick Ode To Richard Mourdoch
By Madeleine Begun Kane
By Mourdoch, I’m shocked — left agape:
He claims if you’re pregnant from rape,
It’s a God-given gift.
So how dare you be miffed!
Your future’s not yours to reshape.
Dear Republicans: If your Platform Committee is going to endorse an “abortion plank that includes no exemptions for rape, incest or even to save the life of the mother,” why bother condemning Todd Akin’s outrageous rape comments?
Were you hoping we wouldn’t notice that your platform is just as misogynous as the guy you’re condemning?
Platitudes And Platforms (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP Platform Committee
Re abortion is lacking in pity
For victims of rape
And of incest: They ape
Akin’s attitude: Irony city!
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her non-political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
Ode To Pro-Rape Republicans
Friday, October 9th, 2009Thirty Senate Republicans voted to keep rape victims who work for defense contractors from having their day in court. How? By voting against an Al Franken-proposed amendment to the 2010 Defense Appropriations Bill that would withhold defense contracts from companies (like Dick Cheney’s KBR) “if they restrict their employees from taking workplace sexual assault, battery and discrimination cases to court.”
Franken was inspired to sponsor this amendment by the ordeal of Jamie Leigh Jones, who was gang-raped by her co-workers while working for Halliburton/KBR in Baghdad. A clause in Jones’ KBR employment contract made employer-friendly private arbitration her only recourse, precluding Jones from seeking justice in court.
I hope all those pro-rape Republicans (listed below my limerick) are proud of themselves:
Ode To Pro-Rape Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though Republicans yearn for support
From females, they’re bound to fall short:
Their position on rape
Is in criminal shape
Cuz they treat it like less than a tort.
Here’s the list of the thirty pro-rape Republican Senators:
Lamar Alexander (R-TN) John Barrasso (R-WY) Christopher Bond (R-MO) Sam Brownback (R-KS) Jim Bunning (R-KY) Richard Burr (R-NC) Saxby Chambliss (R-GA) Tom Coburn (R-OK) Thad Cochran (R-MS) Bob Corker (R-TN) John Cornyn (R-TX) Mike Crapo (R-ID) Jim DeMint (R-SC) John Ensign (R-NV) Michael Enzi (R-WY) Lindsey Graham (R-SC) Judd Gregg (R-NH) James Inhofe (R-OK) Johnny Isakson (R-GA) Mike Johanns (R-NE) Jon Kyl (R-AZ) John McCain (R-AZ) Mitch McConnell (R-KY) James Risch (R-ID) Pat Roberts (R-KS) Jeff Sessions (R-AL) Richard Shelby (R-AL) John Thune (R-SD) David Vitter (R-LA) Roger Wicker (R-MS)
Tags: Al Franken, Appropriations Bill, Defense Contractors, Employee Lawsuits, Employment Contracts, Feminist, Halliburton, Jamie Leigh Jones, KBR, Rape Victims, Republican Senators, Sexual Assault
Posted in Al Franken, Crime, David Vitter, Dick Cheney Satire, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Inhofe Humor, James DeMint, Jeff Sessions, John Ensign, John McCain, Judd Gregg, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 10 Comments »