Posts Tagged ‘Mitt Romney’

Lightweights — No Debate!

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

Lightweights — No Debate!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Republicans held a debate
To see which prez contender would rate.
Not a one was impressive,
And all are regressive—
Mad lightweights galore! What a slate!

Tim “Tame” Pawlenty

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

If there’s one common theme about last night’s Republican Presidential debate it’s this: Tim Pawlenty blew it by blowing off an op (handed to him by CNN’s John King) to reprise his “Obamneycare” anti-Romney attack:

Tim Pawlenty,
a debater failed.
Asked about “Obamneycare,”
he simply bailed.

Revisionist History On Auto Pilot

Wednesday, May 25th, 2011

Remember when Republicans opposed the automobile industry bailout, slamming Obama for his “government takeover?”

Now that Obama’s auto industry rescue plan is a raging success, Republicans have acknowledged their error and congratulated Obama on a job well done, right?

Hahahahaha!

So can we trust the media to make sure Republicans like Romney, Corker, Pawlenty, Kasich, and their ilk don’t scam people into thinking the bailout was their idea?

You’re kidding, right?

Revisionist History On Auto Pilot
By Madeleine Begun Kane

So what did Republicans say
To auto co bailouts? No way!
But the past they would edit
And try to take credit:
It worked, so that plan was “their” play.

Who’s Our President, Again?

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011

A good way to gauge a Republican pol’s classiness quotient is his or her response to Osama bin Laden’s killing:

Do they congratulate everyone who deserves credit, including President Obama?

Do they act as if Barack Obama was merely carrying out Bush’s bidding?

Do they pretend Obama doesn’t even exist?

Needless to say, Sarah Palin has failed the classiness test.

Who’s Our President, Again?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Some Republican comments show class
And give credit where due without sass:
Mitt Romney and Dub
And Pawlenty don’t snub
Prez Obama. But Palin’s an ass.

Open Limerick To Birthers

Friday, April 22nd, 2011

Hey Birthers, in between mouthing off about Obama and demanding the already-furnished proof that Obama was born in the U.S., I have a fun new assignment for you: How about ranting about Mitt Romney and demanding Romney’s elusive certificate of live birth?

What’s the matter Donald “Birther” Trump? Can’t you afford any more investigators?

Open Limerick To Birthers
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Certifiable birth record pests
Keep beating their paranoid chests.
Yet they don’t have a fit
Over Romney, yes Mitt —
Where’s their int’rest in Mitt-record quests?

Author’s Note: For the record (and for the sarcasm-challenged) I’m confident that both Obama and Romney were born in the United States.

(You can find born-related haiku here.)

Mitt Romney: Constitutionally Confused

Friday, March 26th, 2010

Credit where credit is due: When it comes to self-contradiction, Mitt Romney is both fearless and peerless.

Once a staunch advocate of individual health insurance mandates — the Massachusetts governor who ardently defended their constitutionality — Romney has flip-flopped. Now that they’re required by the Democrats’ Affordable Care Act, they’ve magically turned unconstitutional.

Of course, constant flip-flops can be hard on the constitution. So it’s no surprise that Mitt Romney was for individual mandates before he was against them.

That brings me to my latest limerick:

Mitt Romney: Constitutionally Confused
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Individual mandates are great,
Said Mitt re Mass. health bill’s debate.
Now he swears that they’re awful
And even unlawful.
Your claims, my dear Mitt — get them straight.

Addled Threats

Monday, March 22nd, 2010

Now that health reform has passed, Republicans are angrier than ever. Mitt Romney calls it an “unconscionable abuse of power” and Bill Kristol is urging repeal in a Weekly Standard editorial. Moreover, Senators John McCain, Judd Gregg and their fellow GOPers are so incensed that they’ve come up with a very creative threat:

GOP senators emerged Monday to caution that the health debate had taken a toll on the institution, warning of little work between parties the rest of this year.

“There will be no cooperation for the rest of the year,” McCain said during an interview Monday on an Arizona radio affiliate. “They have poisoned the well in what they’ve done and how they’ve done it.”

Wow! The next thing you know, Republicans will be vowing to filibuster and obstruct.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Addled Threats
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The GOP’s angry as hell.
Says McCain, Dems have “poisoned the well.”
So the rest of the year
We won’t work with them here.
And how is that diff’rent? Do tell!

     

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I proud to say that this post is mentioned in the excellent
Health Wonk Review: Special Edition On Health Reform.