The Dems and the press-folk are keen
On playing a blame game, obscene.
But they’re missing the point
In their haste to anoint
A fall guy: Most voters are mean!
Posts Tagged ‘Media’
Trump Election Blame Game (Limerick)
Tuesday, November 12th, 2024The Media’s Mistake (Limerick)
Saturday, September 7th, 2024This New Republic column inspired my latest limerick: “How the Media Sanitizes Trump’s Insanity”
Dear Political Press, please take note:
Stop reframing Trump’s rants; use a quote!
No more rend’ring coherent
His spewings aberrant;
Cease helping him skew how folks vote!
Health-Menace-In-Chief
Wednesday, March 25th, 2020Headline: “CNN and MSNBC Staff Push Back on Airing Trump’s Coronavirus ‘Lies’”
From the Donald the truth’s rather rare.
Crisis briefings? There’s lying to spare.
Trump is flooding our nation
With false information.
Knock his dangerous rants off the air!
Press Coverage Matters (Limerick)
Tuesday, June 11th, 2019New York Times Headline: “Elizabeth Warren Has Lots of Plans. Together, They Would Remake the Economy.”
Some regard Warren’s planning with boredom.
Others cheer her. Some say: “Can’t afford ’em!”
Hill had detailed plans too
But, alas, few folks knew
Cuz the media mostly ignored ’em.
DC’s TMZ’d (Limerick)
Thursday, March 21st, 2019Headline: “Trump Brought TMZ Politics to Washington”
When Trump went from prez-nominee
To our president, most hoped he’d be
A new man; changed, matured
By the job he’d secured.
But it’s Donald who’s altered DC.
Trump Dumps Yet Another Press Chief (Limerick)
Saturday, March 9th, 2019Headline: “Instead of a New Press Chief, Trump Could Try Committing Fewer Crimes”
Trump’s approach to bad press isn’t wise;
He blames staffers, replacing the guys
And the women whose quest
Is good press. I suggest
Cutting down on his crimes and his lies.
Our Oval Menace (Limerick)
Thursday, December 27th, 2018
Headline: “Trump Brags To Troops About A Fictional Giant Pay Raise He Got Them”
Dear Donald, by lying to troops,
You dishonor and treat them like dupes.
Your “regime” is a mess,
And you menace the press…
Though you DO provide plenty of scoops.
*****
Covert deployment
has been revealed by Donald
who can’t be trusted.
Limerick Ode To Kellyanne Conway
Monday, December 17th, 2018Headline: “Kellyanne Conway complains to Fox News about getting “shut down” on CNN”
Kellyanne has the chutzpah to frown
And complain CNN shuts her down.
But when Conway appears there
She breaks lie-frontiers there;
That Queen of Deceit goes to town!
Trump Puts Press At Risk (Limerick)
Thursday, August 9th, 2018Headline: “Media boost security as Trump ramps up ‘enemy’ rhetoric”
When the media covers Trump rallies,
It’s as risky as ent’ring dark allies.
Donald’s shown us his cards,
So the press now needs guards
Due to menacing crowds and threat tallies.
To Trump, Misogyny’s Not A Bug, But A Feature (Limerick)
Thursday, July 5th, 2018Donald Trump took a shine to Bill Shine;
Ailes-ally, ex-Fox Newser swine.
Now he’s hired the guy
For a staff job way high,
Cuz to Donald misogyny’s fine.
The Trump Threat (Limerick)
Saturday, October 21st, 2017Is Donald a threat to free press?
Well of course my response must be yes.
But much more is in peril
From President Feral;
There’s no end to his menacing mess.
*****
As I train my brain
on our Oval Office bane,
staying sane’s a strain.
*****
Limericks & Sundry Humor (July and August 2017)
Sunday, August 27th, 2017I’ve gathered into a single batch loads of limericks and other (mostly Trump-related) humor I wrote during the summer of 2017, while recovering from wrist surgery:
*****
I suspect there’s a hole in Trump’s soul;
Donald pardoned a bigoted troll,
Deeming racism kosher.
(What act could be gaucher?)
Bias AIN’T just okay. It’s Trump’s goal.
*******
An unqualified Trump aide named Gorka,
Who’s despised by most ev’ry New Yorkuh,
Has been dumped. Will he rail
In a big pay-day tale?
I’m betting his story’s a corkuh.
*********
Alas, Harvey is fixing to mow
Through Texas, a menacing blow.
Trump’s FEMA’s done little;
Just talk laced with spittle.
But at least, Donald’s helped Sheriff Joe.
*****
Life With Mark and Madeleine:
Mark: I love NPR, except for late afternoons.
Madeleine: What’s the problem?
Mark: Each time I tune in, I hear the same damn story!
Madeleine: Maybe they should call it “One Thing Considered.”
*****
“Alex Jones calls Charlottesville violence a false flag, because alternative facts are still a thing”
What to do when your allies are caught
Doing wrong, and you fear all’s for naught?
There’s the Infowars’ chestnut:
Yes Jones is the best nut
To hatch “false flag” claims, overwrought.
*****
Oval Office blight;
Hope’s plummeting out of sight.
Can’t succumb to plight!
*****
I have run out of patience with those
Who voted for Trump. Your vote blows!
If you still like the guy,
Please do NOT explain why.
I don’t care; You’re to blame for our woes!
*****
Sarah Huckabee Sanders: “The President is probably one of the strongest presidents we’ve had on economic issues.”
So true! Which Is why I can’t wait for Trump’s forthcoming treatise:
Strong Dollar/ Weak Dollar: Which One’s Better?
*****
Trump Advisor: A quick question, Mr. President, before you leave for golf: Any thoughts on naming an Ambassador to South Korea?
Trump: Absolutely not! No ambassador until they stop building nukes!
Trump Advisor: Sir, I’m pretty sure North Korea’s the one with the nukes.
Trump: Double check and get back to me. But first, where are my clubs?
*****
“POTUS has been briefed on [Hurricane] Harvey’s progress, as well as preparations, by his Homeland Security Advisor, Tom Bossert.”
Bossert: Harvey’s headed to Texas, but things are under…
Trump: Paul Harvey! Great radio guy! But isn’t he dead?
*****
Trump’s White House (from Cab Secs to VEEP)
Is so lawless, I just want to weep.
Take the Hatch Act; Ben’s speech
Last night was a breach.
My advice? Plead “I spoke in my sleep.”
(Ben Carson Hatch Act Phoenix Rally)
*****
“Trump to Congress: Fund the Wall or I’ll Shut the Government”
Donald thinks he has magical powers
To bully, till ev’ryone cowers:
“Build my wall!” (His first love)
“Or I’ll shut down the gov!”
No, not Mexico’s government! Ours!
*****
Trump’s Phoenix Rally
Yet another divisive Trump rally!
(Donald’s held way too many to tally.)
He was crazy, yet boring;
I swear I heard snoring,
As hundreds skipped Donald’s finale.
*****
Photo of the Day: “President Trump stares straight into solar eclipse without glasses”
The eclipse had us viewing our skies,
But ev’ryone knows it ain’t wise
To stare at the sun
While the moon’s having fun;
So dear Donald, good luck with your eyes.
*****
Our Naval destroyer collides.
Ten sailors are lost in the tides.
Trump is asked, as the Prez,
To comment, and says:
“That’s too bad!” What a lift he provides!
*****
Mar-a-Lago keeps losing events,
Reducing Trump’s dollars and cents;
Non-profits galore
Wish to be there no more.
Schadenfreude? My case is immense!
*****
Modest Proposal 4 Trump’s Afghanistan speech:
Declare victory. Take credit. Announce immediate withdrawal.
What’s another Trump lie?
*****
Though Trump skirts the truth to the max,
With an attitude far worse than lax,
He defended delaying
Tough statements by braying:
Before speaking, “I like to know facts.”
*****
Both sides good!
Both sides bad!
Me like facts!
Fake media’s mad!
*****
Dear Trump, don’t expect me to cheer
Today’s speech; your reluctance was clear.
Condemnation delayed
Simply won’t make the grade.
Sneers and jeers for your words insincere!
*****
Me great president!
Racism bad!!!
Everyone happy now?
Can I go back to golf?
*****
The Donald’s an arrogant fool
Who possesses just one tiny tool:
The dominance game,
Which is best not to aim
At someone who’s equally cruel.
*****
Trump & North Korea Haiku
“Fire!” “Fury!”
“Locked and Loaded!”
Adolescent bullies, goaded.
*****
Bombings tend to make Trump go to town;
He’ll speak out and he’ll tweet and he’ll frown!
But he’s yet to decry
Friday’s mosque attack. Why?
Have Twitter and Facebook been down?
*****
Seems that Pence has been caught at ambition,
A perilous White House condition.
Pence denies it, of course.
Will Trump force a “divorce,”
As suspicion incites trust attrition?
*****
“Is the Donald about to ‘reset?'”
That’s a query I simply don’t get.
Yet the press loves to ask it.
Instead, I would task it:
Truly cover our national threat.
*****
The Trump presidency could be just the thing that converts me from agnostic to atheist.
*****
Dear Head of the Boy Scouts, explain
Trump’s invasion inside your domain
With a broadside so mad,
You said “Sorry! My bad!”
Tell me: Why would you think he’d act sane?
*****
If Trump’s White House is a “fine-tuned machine,” mark me down for a jalopy.
*****
Sean Spicer has fled from his box,
So the White House is losing his vox,
Which was often embattled;
He lied and he prattled…
Skills soon to be transferred to Fox?
*****
A visit from “Donald, the Cad”
To London’s postponed; the poor lad
Heard that protests were planned,
Making Trump feel unmanned.
Demonstration-fears stopping him? Sad!
*****
Junk health insurance—
Just what the doctor ordered.
*****
Dear Jared, you’ll soon be in hock
To your lawyers, who bill round the clock.
Will they help you to skate?
I say prison’s your fate,
As a chip off the old Kushner block.
*****
Trump’s Voter Fraud “Investigator” Demands State Voter Records, And States Ain’t Happy:
“Just what are they trying to hide?”
Trump’s response, when most states won’t abide
By vile records demands;
Voter privacy stands
Somehow wrong? Trump’s returns, still un-eyed.
*****
Dear Alex Jones (Limerick)
Saturday, April 22nd, 2017An Alex Jones request, apparently made without any sense of irony:
“Alex Jones releases statement on his ongoing custody trial: ‘I urge the press to be respectful and responsible.'”
Dear Alex, you threw us a curve
And proved you still have quite the nerve
In requesting respect.
Hope the press will elect
To bestow the respect you deserve.
Bill O’Reilly? Buh-Bye!
Wednesday, April 19th, 2017O’Reilly is OUT? Don’t appease me
And tease me with rumors that please me.
Oh it’s trending on Twitter?
I’ll giggle and titter:
Schadenfreude such news guarantees me.
The White House Drip (Limerick)
Wednesday, February 8th, 2017Donald’s reign is a journalist’s dream;
It’s so sievelike — it leaks in a stream.
But the White House so leaky
Fills Trump with such pique, he
Keeps bleating his stale, “fake news” theme.
Dear Media: Stop Already with the “Jeb’s The Sane Republican” Meme!
Wednesday, July 29th, 2015Jeb’s the cure for the GOP mess
Cuz he’s civil — so sayeth the press.
Yet as gov, Jeb was rotten!
Is Schiavo forgotten?
Jeb’s transgressions caused tragic distress.
Limerick Ode To Mike Wallace (1918-2012)
Sunday, April 8th, 2012Limerick Ode To Mike Wallace
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mike Wallace, a man without peer,
As a journalist often struck fear
In villainous hearts
With persistence and smarts.
Let us toast his distinguished career.
Now Playing On My Other Blog
Wednesday, January 13th, 2010If you’d like a break from politics, my other (general humor) blog has a pair of limericks about the Conan O’Brien, Jay Leno, NBC controversy and about Simon Cowell’s decision to leave American Idol.
