This New Republic column inspired my latest limerick: “How the Media Sanitizes Trump’s Insanity”
Dear Political Press, please take note:
Stop reframing Trump’s rants; use a quote!
No more rend’ring coherent
His spewings aberrant;
Cease helping him skew how folks vote!
New York Times Headline: “Elizabeth Warren Has Lots of Plans. Together, They Would Remake the Economy.”
Some regard Warren’s planning with boredom.
Others cheer her. Some say: “Can’t afford ’em!”
Hill had detailed plans too
But, alas, few folks knew
Cuz the media mostly ignored ’em.
Eric Boehlert on Twitter: “the press is now doing postmortems on the Mueller Report, which they haven’t read.”
Dear press, do not do a postmortem
On the Mueller Report. Please abort ’em.
It’s unseen and unread,
So you can’t put to bed
Or assess it. Don’t write or report ’em.
Trump’s latest conspiracy theory
(And they all make me terribly weary)
Is that Google is biased;
Bad press appears highest!
Poor Trump — fact-based news makes him teary.
Headline: “Media boost security as Trump ramps up ‘enemy’ rhetoric”
When the media covers Trump rallies,
It’s as risky as ent’ring dark allies.
Donald’s shown us his cards,
So the press now needs guards
Due to menacing crowds and threat tallies.
Headline: “Trump grumbles that North Korea deal not earning wide praise”
My deals are the best! They’re top drawer!
I’ve saved millions from nuclear war.
So where is my credit?
Fake News of course shred it.
I’ll sue till they tell me, “J’adore!”
Headline: “Sinclair producer in Nebraska resigns to protest ‘obvious bias'”
The Trump-loving owner Sinclair
Mandates talking points over the air;
Outlets MUST yell “Fake News”
To dupe and confuse.
The target’s all media that’s fair.
Dear Members Of The Media:
When a Republican refuses to consider any tax rate hike whatsoever … even for millionaires and billionaires … that’s an extremist position. So it would be nice if you’d stop acting as if the few Republicans claiming sudden independence from Grover Norquist’s tax pledge are moderates, when they’re still refusing to consider any rate hikes.
To put it another way, a slight compromise in one’s extremism is still extremism:
The way the whole “fiscal cliff” thing (itself a contrivance based on the Republican view that expiration of the Bush tax cuts and imposition of defense spending cuts would be an apocalyptic development) is being discussed in the MSM is a depressing vindication of the huge strategic advantages of partisan extremism. If you are crazy enough for a while, then agreeing to be slightly less crazy looks statesmanlike.
Open Limerick To The Mainstream Media
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The press is again just a dupe
In the make-believe compromise loop:
A mere marginal move
By extremists can’t prove
That they’re aught but a lunatic group.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her non-political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
