Posts Tagged ‘Lies’

Tucker Carlson Deceit (Limerick)

Friday, April 30th, 2021

Headline: “Fox News host Tucker Carlson claims making children wear masks is ‘abuse’”

A kid in a mask? That’s “abuse,”
According to Carlson, who’s loose
With his words on the air.
But Tuck doesn’t care:
“Call the cops,” like he says … then vamoose.

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Posted in Fox News Humor, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Tucker Carlson Deceit (Limerick)

Limerick Ode To Kellyanne Conway

Monday, December 17th, 2018

Headline: “Kellyanne Conway complains to Fox News about getting “shut down” on CNN”

Kellyanne has the chutzpah to frown
And complain CNN shuts her down.
But when Conway appears there
She breaks lie-frontiers there;
That Queen of Deceit goes to town!

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Posted in Donald Trump, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Kellyanne Conway

Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Tuesday, May 1st, 2018

My advice for the Donald: “Forego
Mueller’s questions. Don’t go toe-to-toe.
Cuz deceit is on tap
When your sneering lips flap.
You will lie while you’re saying hello.”

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Posted in Donald Trump, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 3 Comments »

Why Trump Lies (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 21st, 2017

Self-aggrandizing lies are the norm
From the Donald; each falsehood-filled storm
Sows confusion and doubt,
Which he can’t do without.
How to shore up support? Disinform!

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Posted in Donald Trump, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Why Trump Lies (Limerick)

Limerick Ode To Our Liar-In-Chief

Monday, March 6th, 2017

I used to respond with surprise
Upon hearing Trump’s venom-filled lies,
But his yarns are so chronic
(A self-prescribed tonic?)
That banking on fiction is wise.

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Posted in Donald Trump, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 1 Comment »

Trump’s Record of Deception (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 21st, 2017

Today’s Washington Post headline cries out for a limerick:

Donald Trump’s streak of falsehoods now stands at 33 days

Donald Trump has been president for all or part of 33 days. He has averaged four falsehoods or misleading statements a day(!) in that time. There hasn’t been a single day of Trump’s presidency in which he has said nothing false or misleading.

As Donald spouts stats that ain’t real,
Here’s one grounded in fact Trump won’t feel
Any impulse to tout:
Daily lies from the lout
Av’rage four — Donald’s Artifice Deal.

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Posted in Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 1 Comment »

Yet Another Trump Limerick

Friday, August 12th, 2016

Trump’s speeches are vile and bombastic,
With fantastical falsehoods so drastic,
That he crosses the line,
Which for Trump is just fine.
His defense? “I was being sarcastic.”

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Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Yet Another Trump Limerick

Trump’s Already Making Excuses For Losing The Election (Limerick)

Monday, August 1st, 2016

There’s no end to the lies and abuses
That “The Donald” so often produces.
Here’s his latest deflection:
He fears the election
Is “rigged.” Trump — “Tycoon of Excuses!”

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Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 1 Comment »

With Pals Like Ben Carson… (Limerick)

Friday, March 25th, 2016

I love this Ben Carson quote from his appearance on “The View:”

He also declined to refute charges from the hosts of the show that Trump is a liar, saying only, “tell me a politician who doesn’t tell lies?”

When he’s asked: Isn’t Donald a liar?
Ain’t it true that his pants are fire?
Carson’s tepid reply
Is: What pol doesn’t lie?
What inspiring praise from Trump’s choir!

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Posted in Ben Carson, Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on With Pals Like Ben Carson… (Limerick)

Frankly, They’re Lying (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 19th, 2016

You probably know this old chestnut of a joke: “How can you tell when a politician is lying? When his (or her) lips move.”

Here’s my own slightly less cynical lie detection technique:

How do you know that a politician is lying? The word ‘frankly’ comes out of his/her mouth.

Donald Trump and Carly Fiorina seem especially fond of the word ‘frankly,’ but they’re certainly not alone in having that ‘tell.’

Pols frequently telegraph lies.
For example, I’m quick to surmise
That a whopper’s about
To be told by some lout
When he uses the ‘frankly’ disguise.

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Posted in Campaign Humor, Carly Fiorina, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Frankly, They’re Lying (Limerick)

Limerick Ode To Politifact’s Liar Of The Year

Monday, December 21st, 2015

Congratulations to Donald Trump on winning the Politifact 2015 Lie of the Year Award!

The “Lie of the Year” prize is Trump’s.
Though many pols fib, Donald jumps
To the top of the list;
His stump speech’s gist
Is take dumps on the truth to hook chumps.

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Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Politifact’s Liar Of The Year

Romney’s Lies Are Jeep (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 30th, 2012

Mitt Romney keeps repeating a claim that he knows to be false: Both in speeches and ads, he asserts that Chrysler’s moving all Jeep production to China. In truth, Chrysler’s adding 2200 Jeep employees in Toledo, Ohio and Detroit, Michigan.

But what’s a little thing like the truth, when you’re trying to deceive your way into the White House?

Romney’s Lies Are Jeep (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Romney’s China-Jeep ad is a lie.
Yet he keeps doubling down on it. Why?
Cuz he’s paid little price
For his lies. That device
Gets him votes. Bid democracy “Bye!”

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Posted in Automobiles Satire, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 5 Comments »

Hannity Insanity

Thursday, June 11th, 2009

Few people are better at creating a Krauthammer-lauded “alternate reality” than Fox’s Sean Hannity. Columnist Dick Polman provides an excellent example:

On his Fox show one week ago, Sean Hannity told his credulous fans that President Obama had made a deliberate effort during his Cairo speech “to give 9/11 sympathizers a voice on the world stage.” … Hannity even backed up his reporting by airing a video clip from the speech, with Obama saying: “I am aware that there are still some that would question or even justify the events of 9/11.”

…

… Hannity’s video clip of Obama was truncated after that single quoted sentence, omitting everything that followed. Here’s what Obama said next, none of which was aired for the Fox viewers:

“But let us be clear. Al Qaeda killed nearly 3000 people on that day. The victims were innocent men, women and children from America and many other nations who had done nothing to harm anybody. And yet al Qaeda chose to ruthlessly murder these people … These are not opinions to be debated; these are facts to be dealt with.” …

For that outrageous deception alone, Sean Hannity deserves a limerick:

Hannity Insanity
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There once was a fellow named Hannity
Who strutted and showed off his vanity.
From his Fox chair he lied,
Took his fans for a ride,
And showed utter disdain for humanity.

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Posted in 9/11 Satire, Foreign Policy, Fox News Humor, Media Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Sean Hannity Verse, Terrorism | 6 Comments »

Hark! The Disgraced Former Speaker Speaks.

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

It’s simple enough to avoid Judge Sonia Sotomayor smear-tweets like these:

White man racist nominee would be forced to withdraw. Latina woman racist should also withdraw.

Imagine a judicial nominee said “my experience as a white man makes me better than a latina woman” new racism is no better than old racism.

Just be sure not to follow Newt Gingrich’s Twitter feed.

If only it were as easy to dodge Newt on TV, in print, and on the Net.

And that brings me to my latest song parody, which you can sing to Hark! The Herald Angels Sing:

Hark! The Disgraced Former Speaker Speaks.
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Hark! The former Speaker speaks.
Headlines, Speaker Gingrich seeks.
News cos eagerly come through.
They don’t care his claims ain’t true.

Gleefully he airs his lies,
Spreading venom, media buys.
Watch the ousted Newt proclaim,
Sonia is just a racist dame.

Darkly, Gingrich spews his views.
Can’t avoid him on the news.

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Posted in Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Media Satire, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Sonia Sotomayor Verse, Supreme Court, Twitter | 8 Comments »

Ode To The Deceitful Cheneys

Monday, May 25th, 2009

The omni-presence of Dick and Liz Cheney on (as Rachel Maddow loves to call it) “the TV machine” is nearly enough to get me to toss out my televisions. Of course, to have even a shot at avoiding their tortured lies, I’d have to cancel my Net connection, throw out my radios, and avert my eyes in the unlikely event that I encounter a newspaper.

Ode To The Deceitful Cheneys (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There once was a daughter named Liz
Who joined in the family biz.
The business was lying,
With all members vying
For liar-in-chief — each a wiz.

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Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, Family Values Humor, Foreign Policy, Gitmo Humor, GOP Humor, Liz Cheney, Media Satire, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Rachel Maddow, Republicans Humor, Torture Humor | 8 Comments »

My Homage To Feigned Outrage

Thursday, May 14th, 2009

Republicans (and Joe Lieberman) have been staging yet another temper tantrum. What’s their grievance du jour? Speaker Nancy Pelosi said CIA leaders misled Congress about interrogation techniques.

My Homage To Feigned Outrage
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The CIA’s under attack
By the Speaker who gave it a smack.
She accused it of lying.
The GOP’s crying:
She’s mean and must take it all back.

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Posted in CIA Satire, Congress Humor, GOP Humor, House Satire, Iraq War Humor, Joe Lieberman, Pelosi Verse, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Torture Humor | 2 Comments »

Tough Negotiators, Those Bushies!

Thursday, March 19th, 2009

I practiced law for over a dozen years and negotiated lots of contracts. And, unlike the Bush administration, I always kept my poker face. Why? Because if you want the best possible deal, you must make the other party think that he needs you more than you need him.

So, for example, when you tell banks that they’re too big to fail, you disincentivize them from cooperating, or even telling you the truth. That’s why I’m not surprised that 13 of the “top 23 private recipients of taxpayer-funded bailouts under the $700 billion program” enacted by the Bush administration “owed more than $220 million in unpaid federal taxes” and that they lied about it on their TARP contracts.

Why bother being honest? After all, it’s not as if Bush’s Treasury Department made them back up their statements with actual tax records. Of course not — they were too big to fail.

This brings me to my latest limerick:

Tough Negotiators, Those Bushies!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear bank, we can not let you fail.
You’re too big. Pay no mind if we wail
That you owe us back tax.
Do not worry. Relax!
Cuz that huge bailout check’s in the mail.

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Posted in Banking Humor, Ben Bernanke, Business Humor, Corruption Humor, Crime, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, George Bush Satire, Henry Paulson, Law Satire, Paulson Plan, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, TARP Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, Tim Geithner | 4 Comments »

Ode To Ari Fleischer

Friday, March 13th, 2009

The stream of deceit that came pouring out of Ari Fleischer’s belligerent mouth during his Chris Matthews’ interview must surely have set some sort of record. And his calling Matthews’ “shameful” gives new meaning to the word chutzpah. Then, of course, there’s the 9/11 lie:

Fleischer: “After September 11th having been hit once how could we take a chance that Saddam might strike again? And that’s the threat that has been removed and I think we are all safer with that threat removed.”

Matthews: “I’m proud that we no longer have an administration that uses that kind argument…and the American people are too.”

This brings me to my latest limerick:

Ode To Ari Fleischer
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Ari, your lies just keep flying.
But sorry, we still are not buying.
That nine-one-one hit
Was not Saddam, you twit!
And to say so is shameful. Stop lying!

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Posted in 9/11 Satire, Ari Fleischer, Chris Matthews, Hypocrisy Humor, Media Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Spin Humor | 2 Comments »