Posts Tagged ‘Judiciary Satire’

Liz Cheney’s Song

Monday, June 8th, 2009

When Judge Sonia Sotomayor was first nominated for the U.S. Supreme Court, I started writing this Mike Huckabee-related song parody:

Maria,
I’d swear that her name was Maria.

Unfortunately, I got distracted and never finished it. However, I did find another use for this Leonard Bernstein West Side Story tune. My latest song parody concerns the ubiquitous Liz Cheney:

Liz Cheney’s Song
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Liz Cheney.
You just can’t avoid Lizzie Cheney.
The former Veep’s to blame.
Their surnames are the same, you see.

Liz Cheney.
I sure would not miss Lizzie Cheney,
If suddenly I found
Liz Cheney unrenowned. Yippee!

Liz Cheney.
Say it loud and her lies are playing.
Make her stop, I confess I am praying.

Liz Cheney.
She’ll never stop fibbing.
Liz Cheney.

The most terrible lies I’ve ever heard.
Liz Cheney.

Ode To Mark Krikorian

Friday, May 29th, 2009

The National Review’s Mark Krikorian is having problems with Judge Sonia Sotomayor’s name. Apparently, its pronunciation doesn’t sufficiently conform to Krikorian’s Anglo standards. So what’s his solution? He pronounces it any old way he feels like it. And he thinks the rest of us should do the same.

Krikorian argued that the proper pronunciation, preferred by the judge and her family, is “unnatural in English,” and “something we shouldn’t be giving in to.” It wasn’t clear which group of people constituted “we.”

Krikorian added that “newcomers” should “adapt” to how “countrymen say your name.” To do otherwise would be a failure of “multiculturalism.” He knows how to pronounce the Supreme Court nominee’s name, but he doesn’t like it, and would like others to join him in pronouncing it incorrectly.

After catching some well-deserved flack about these comments, Krikorian further embarrassed himself with this:

While in the past there may well have been too much social pressure for what sociologists call Anglo-conformity, now there isn’t enough. I think that’s a concern that most Americans share at some level, which is the root of the angst over excessive immigration, bilingual education, official English, etc.

If anyone deserves a limerick, it’s Mark Krikorian:

Ode To Mark Krikorian
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Pronouncing some names can be tough.
When they’re foreign they’re weird and they’re rough.
Yes, Krikorian’s right.
Krik, they’re really a blight.
So one syllable’s surely enough.

Hark! The Disgraced Former Speaker Speaks.

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

It’s simple enough to avoid Judge Sonia Sotomayor smear-tweets like these:

White man racist nominee would be forced to withdraw. Latina woman racist should also withdraw.

Imagine a judicial nominee said “my experience as a white man makes me better than a latina woman” new racism is no better than old racism.

Just be sure not to follow Newt Gingrich’s Twitter feed.

If only it were as easy to dodge Newt on TV, in print, and on the Net.

And that brings me to my latest song parody, which you can sing to Hark! The Herald Angels Sing:

Hark! The Disgraced Former Speaker Speaks.
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Hark! The former Speaker speaks.
Headlines, Speaker Gingrich seeks.
News cos eagerly come through.
They don’t care his claims ain’t true.

Gleefully he airs his lies,
Spreading venom, media buys.
Watch the ousted Newt proclaim,
Sonia is just a racist dame.

Darkly, Gingrich spews his views.
Can’t avoid him on the news.

Karl’s Roving Standards

Sunday, May 3rd, 2009

Nothing brings out Republican hypocrisy like a nice, juicy U.S. Supreme Court vacancy. Take Karl Rove, for instance, on Obama’s potential nominees to replace Justice David Souter:

Karl Rove rails against the possible nomination of Judge Sonia Sotomayor because “her opinions…have been very liberal.” But when Sandra Day O’Connor retired, Rove said the opposition has a responsibility to approve judges who are qualified, even if they disagree with their views.

And that brings me to my latest double limerick:

Karl’s Roving Standards
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Rove’s memory’s certainly short.
Back when dealing with names for the Court,
He said Dems must not nix
Any Bush judgeship picks
Based on views that they failed to support.

But now that the tables are turned,
He says Dem nominees must be spurned
If Republicans think
That their politics stink.
Consistency? Karl? Unconcerned!