Posts Tagged ‘Immigrants’

Donald’s Just-Pretend Emergency (Limerick)

Friday, January 11th, 2019

Trump’s attempting a blackmail-insurgency:
“I’ve the right to declare an emergency.
But I WON’T do it yet.
Right now it’s a threat!” …
Which proves that there’s really no urgency.

Ben Carson’s No Slave To Accuracy (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 7th, 2017

When HUD Secretary Ben Carson was criticized for conflating slaves and immigrants, he complained that his words had been misconstrued. Unfortunately, however, Carson has a long history of referring to slaves as immigrants. So he’s earned himself this limerick:

Slaves forcibly shipped to our nation
(Per Ben Carson’s REPEATED conflation)
Were immigrants. Wow!
Offensive? And how!
Has his brain suffered O2 privation?

Limerick Ode To Ben Carson

Thursday, August 20th, 2015

Limerick Ode To Ben Carson
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Carson’s soft-spoken drone is misleading.
To extremists, there’s nothing he’s ceding:
As prez he would order
Drone strikes at our border.
My prescription? Ben’s brain could use treating.

Ode To Mark Krikorian

Friday, May 29th, 2009

The National Review’s Mark Krikorian is having problems with Judge Sonia Sotomayor’s name. Apparently, its pronunciation doesn’t sufficiently conform to Krikorian’s Anglo standards. So what’s his solution? He pronounces it any old way he feels like it. And he thinks the rest of us should do the same.

Krikorian argued that the proper pronunciation, preferred by the judge and her family, is “unnatural in English,” and “something we shouldn’t be giving in to.” It wasn’t clear which group of people constituted “we.”

Krikorian added that “newcomers” should “adapt” to how “countrymen say your name.” To do otherwise would be a failure of “multiculturalism.” He knows how to pronounce the Supreme Court nominee’s name, but he doesn’t like it, and would like others to join him in pronouncing it incorrectly.

After catching some well-deserved flack about these comments, Krikorian further embarrassed himself with this:

While in the past there may well have been too much social pressure for what sociologists call Anglo-conformity, now there isn’t enough. I think that’s a concern that most Americans share at some level, which is the root of the angst over excessive immigration, bilingual education, official English, etc.

If anyone deserves a limerick, it’s Mark Krikorian:

Ode To Mark Krikorian
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Pronouncing some names can be tough.
When they’re foreign they’re weird and they’re rough.
Yes, Krikorian’s right.
Krik, they’re really a blight.
So one syllable’s surely enough.

Seeing Red Over Rep. Betty Brown

Saturday, April 11th, 2009

I’m a bit late on the “Asians should change their names” story. But I do have the “on vacation” and “under the weather” excuse.

Texas state representative Betty Brown (R-Terrell, in North Texas) caused a ruckus on Tuesday by saying, during testimony about voter ID legislation, that Asians would have an easier time of getting along if they simply changed their names.

“Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese — I understand it’s a rather difficult language — do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?”

If anyone deserves a double limerick, it’s Rep. Betty Brown:

Seeing Red Over Rep. Betty Brown
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If your name hails from Asia, it’s hard.
So don’t bitch if your ballot is barred.
Said Rep. Brown, “Change your name,”
Cuz your name is to blame
For confusing us. What a canard!

Please take heed if your name’s Cho or Wu,
And here’s what I think you should do:
Simply pity Rep. Brown.
She’s a prejudiced clown.
La femme est chauvine et sans clue.