Posts Tagged ‘GOP Humor’
Monday, March 2nd, 2015
Most Want President to Have a High School Diploma
A new Public Opinion Polling survey finds that 62% of voters think it’s important for the President to have a high school diploma, compared to only 31% who think it doesn’t matter.
Interesting: “There’s a large partisan divide on the issue: Democrats by an 81%-14% spread think it’s important, while Republicans are evenly divided on the matter at 45%-45%.”
When asked to respond to this poll, Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker said, “Only elitists and ISIS supporters would buy into that requirement, whereas Senator Rand Paul said, “Have I mentioned that I’m a doctor?”
Former Texas Governor Rick Perry, a fellow presidential hopeful, disagreed with both men, saying “Don’t glasses make me look smart?”
*****
UPDATE: I was chagrined to learn that my column has fallen afoul of Poe’s Law. What the heck is Poe’s Law? The “literary adage which stipulates that without a clear indicator of an author’s intended sarcasm it becomes impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.”
So for anyone who read this and accepted the poll as real and/or any of the quotes as real, this is hundred percent parody. It was inspired by an actual poll related to whether people believe a U.S. President should have a college degree.
UPDATE 2:
Poe’s Law compressed into a haiku:
In extremist times
reality/parody
appear to have merged.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Education Humor, Election Humor, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parody, Parodies, Poe's Law, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parodies, Political Limericks, Politics Satire, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker, White House | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, September 30th, 2014
Open Limerick to Charlotte Clinton Mezvinsky
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Charlotte, I hope you’re prepared
For attacks, because war’s been declared.
Though you just got your name,
You’re a Clinton — fair game!
Newborn Hillary-heirs won’t be spared.
Tags: Charlotte Clinton Mezvinsky, Chelsea Clinton, GOP Attack Dogs, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Open Limerick to Charlotte Clinton Mezvinsky
Tuesday, August 12th, 2014
This could very well be the silliest limerick I’ve ever written. But when the focal point of a political ad appears to be a horse with a huge penis, I can’t help myself. And if you don’t know what I’m referring to, you simply must take a gander at Gary Kiehne and his well-hung horse.
Horse’s Ass Of A Candidate (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a horse who was mad
Cuz his penis was used in an ad.
“How dare you imply
I’m endorsing that guy!
Scratch my likeness. That candidate’s bad!”
Tags: Advertising Humor, Arizona, Campaign Satire, Conservatives Satire, Election Humor, Gary Kiehne, GOP Humor, Horse Limerick, Political Ads, Political Advertising, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, July 30th, 2014
Impeachment “Scam” (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John Boehner appears to be riled.
Dem impeachment talk’s driving him wild:
How dare Dems boost their brand
When impeachment ain’t planned
For that Oval defiler, reviled!
***
Yesterday, John Boehner called the impeachment notion a “scam” invented by Democrats to excite their base and raise money.
No doubt that will remain Boehner’s claim … right up to the moment the House starts the process to impeach.
Tags: Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Impeachment, John Boehner, Republican Humor, White House
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, House Satire, Impeachment Humor, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 1 Comment »
Thursday, June 5th, 2014
Limerick Ode To World Environment Day (June 5)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
World Environment Day has arrived,
Though “Deniers” insist it’s contrived:
This science contention
That sans intervention,
Global warming will leave us short-lived.
Tags: Anti-Science, Climate Change, Climate Science, Deniers, Global Warming, GOP Humor, June Holidays, Odd Holidays, Republicans Humor, Science Humor, World Environment Day
Posted in Global Warming, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Satire, Science Verse | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To World Environment Day
Saturday, May 31st, 2014
My 2-verse limerick “celebrates” John Boehner, who certainly knows how to be cowardly, evasive, and stupid all at once. Here’s Boehner responding to a question about climate change:
Asked by reporters yesterday if he accepts the scientific consensus that greenhouse gas emissions contribute to global warming, John Boehner demurred on the curious but increasingly familiar grounds that he is not a scientist. “Listen, I’m not qualified to debate the science over climate change,” the House Speaker said. Boehner immediately turned the question to the killing of jobs that would result from any proposal to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, which he asserts with unwavering certainty. (On this question, Boehner is not held back by the fact that he is also not an economist.)
Limerick Ode To John Boehner
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John Boehner, it seems, knows the score;
He’ll be kicked by his “team” out the door
Should he ever concede
What folks know (if they read)
That our climate is changing full-bore.
So Boehner will simply rebuff
Any queries re climate change stuff.
“Can’t debate it he claims;
His “not qualified” aims
To dodge facts, cuz his pals prefer guff.
Tags: Climate Change, Climate Science, Global Warming, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Republicans Humor
Posted in Climate Change, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Verse | 1 Comment »
Thursday, December 5th, 2013
According to a Politico story, Republicans pols and staffers are being given remedial sensitivity training to avoid further Todd Akin-style gaffes and to contend with the party’s gender gap.
Those Sensitive Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republicans, fearful of gaffes,
Are coaching both Congress and staffs
How to talk to a dame.
(Non-offense is their aim.)
How ’bout policy change, just for laughs?
Tags: Feminism, Gender Gap Humor, GOP Humor, Politico, Republican War On Women, Republicans Humor, Todd Akin
Posted in Congress Humor, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 11 Comments »
Monday, August 5th, 2013
Repellent Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“DC’s broken right through to the core,”
Yell Republican pols as they pore
Through old laws they’d repeal
(Who needs the New Deal?)
Determined to break it some more.
Tags: GOP Humor, GOP Idiocy, Legislation Humor, Medicaid, Medicare, New Deal, Nihilism Humor, Obamacare Repeal, Repeal Humor, Republicans Humor, Social Security, Washington DC
Posted in GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington | 33 Comments »
Friday, June 28th, 2013
Ohio State Sen. Nina Turner’s proposed bill regulating men’s reproductive health inspired this multi-verse limerick:
A Modest Men’s Reproductive Health Reg Proposal (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Republican men who insist
On controlling gals’ bodies, we’re pissed.
Since what’s good for the goose
(It’s plain to deduce)
Suits the gander, I’ve drawn up this list:
Viagra henceforth is restricted
To those who can prove they’re afflicted
Via sex partner swearing
You’re impotent, sharing
Your plight through oath uncontradicted.
You must also sex therapy seek
To help you reach sexual peak.
And we’ll force you to take
A stress test, you rake,
And prove that your heart isn’t weak.
In addition, your doc must advise you
About celibacy and apprise you
It’s a “viable choice.”
Yes your doc must give voice
To your options, cuz some may surprise you.
Only then, will the state let your doc
Prescribe any meds for your cock.
After counsel advising
Of side effects rising
From ED pills — nothing to mock.
From then on, you’ll be monitored too
To make sure that your heart ain’t askew.
You’ll be checked and re-tested.
The state is invested
In protecting you guys when you screw.
If you think that such regs are intrusive,
Insulting, and even abusive,
All these rules don’t compare
To what women must bear:
Female freedom is gravely elusive.
Tags: Abortion Rights, Birth Control Limerick, ED, Erectile Dysfunction, Feminism, Feminist Limerick, Gender Humor, Gender Inequality, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Impotence Humor, Legislation Humor, Men's Health, Nina Turner, Ohio, Reproductive Health Humor, Reproductive Rights, Republicans Humor, Viagra Humor, Women's Health
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Constitution Humor, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 19 Comments »
Monday, May 6th, 2013
Enough With The Lame Questions! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s a question that’s making me weary:
“Is Barack a lame duck?” — that’s the query.
Pundits ask this with drama,
While blaming Obama.
The true culprits (like Boehner) ain’t teary.
Tags: Barack Obama, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Lame Duck, Media Humor, Pundit Humor, Republicans Humor, Talking Heads
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, April 3rd, 2013
As long as the GOP’s packed with headline-grabbing wingnuts like Michele Bachmann, the Republican reboot’s going nowhere:
Attention, GOP: Your rebranding attempts are being undercut by a segment of your party getting big headlines and lots of airtime — a segment symbolized by the Minnesota quote-machine, Rep. Michele Bachmann. Due to a series of gaffes, she is again on the receiving end of criticism, including from Fox News powerhouse Bill O’Reilly. The congresswoman is also, as reported by The Daily Beast’s John Avlon, “embroiled in a litany of legal proceedings related to her rolling disaster of a presidential campaign — including an Office of Congressional Ethics investigation into campaign improprieties.”
…She speaks in apocalyptic terms about President Obama and Democrats. She has never met an inaccuracy or exaggeration she didn’t like in her thirst to negatively define the other side. (Fact-checkers following her speeches may soon have to seek workmen’s compensation.)…
Rebootus Interruptus (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP wants to reboot—
Switch its image from crazy old coot
To something appealing,
More meanness-concealing—
A change that its zealots refute.
Tags: Congress Humor, Fox News, GOP Humor, Michele Bachmann, Minnesota, Religious Zealotry, Republican Hypocrisy, Republican Reboot, Republican Rebranding, Wingnuts
Posted in GOP Humor, Michele Bachmann, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 3 Comments »
Thursday, March 14th, 2013
I sure hope you aren’t falling for the Republicans’ pretense of reforming themselves. Although they’ve been pretending to moderate themselves in order to attract women and Latinos, their policies are more brutally extreme than ever:
Don’t be fooled. On the ground, a very different reality is unfolding: In the Republican-led Congress, GOP-dominated statehouses and even before the nation’s highest court, the reactionary impulses of the Republican Party appear unbowed. Across the nation, the GOP’s severely conservative agenda – which seeks to impose job-killing austerity, to roll back voting and reproductive rights, to deprive the working poor of health care, and to destroy agencies that protect the environment from industry and consumers from predatory banks – is moving forward under full steam.
Limerick Ode To Republican “Reformers”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP’s steaming ahead
With plans that most people should dread.
Though they speak of reform,
They’re reverting to norm,
Thus ensuring we’re bled and unfed.
Tags: GOP Humor, Reform, Republicans Humor
Posted in GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, February 28th, 2013
Michael Kinsley is amused by the Republicans’ conflicting complaints about Democrats. So am I.
Limerick Ode To Republican Whiners
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Since Dems are so often maligned
As wimpy, I’m startled to find
A new GOP gripe:
Dems are meanies, they snipe.
Please Republicans, make up your mind.
Tags: GOP Humor, Michael Kinsley, Republican Humor
Posted in GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 4 Comments »
Friday, February 22nd, 2013
John Boehner’s 2011 PowerPoint presentation provides ample proof that sequestration originated with the Republicans.
But even if we didn’t have that smoking gun slide show, the GOP’s attempt to label it “Obama’s sequester” wouldn’t pass the straight-face test. Here’s Andrew Sullivan making that powerful point:
…I simply cannot see how a political party that has branded itself in favor of drastic spending cuts can somehow win a public debate in which they are now apparently opposing drastic spending cuts, and “blaming” them on Obama. And their branding means that the slow government shutdown we will almost certainly now face will surely stick more to them than to Obama.
Sequestration Blame Game (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What’s the key to the GOP brand?
Budget cuts that our land can’t withstand.
So it’s laughably lame
That they’re trying to claim
The sequester’s Obama’s scheme grand.
Tags: Andrew Sullivan, Barack Obama, Blame Game, Budget Cuts, Defense Spending, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Obama's Sequester, Republican Rebranding, Republicans Humor, Sequestration
Posted in Barack Obama, Blame Game, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
Monday, February 11th, 2013
As Obama’s State of the Union address draws nearer, the press (thanks to GOP prodding) has become obsessed with one question: Why the focus on a liberal agenda, instead of jobs and the economy?
Open Limerick To The Media
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Where’s your focus on jobs?” asks the press,
As Obama contends with a mess
Of issues galore,
Cuz his job at its core
Is to many dilemmas address.
So dear media, try this new task:
Press Republicans: Tough questions ask!
Like “Just what have THEY done
About jobs. Name just one
Thing they do besides block, bitch, and bask.”
Tags: Congress Humor, Economy Satire, Employment Humor, GOP Humor, Jobs Jobs Jobs, Liberal Agenda, Media Humor, Obstructionism, President Obama, Press, Republicans Humor, SOTU, State Of The Union Address
Posted in 44 Humor, Congress Humor, Economy Humor, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Legislation Humor, Media Satire, Money & Finance Humor, Money And Finance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, December 18th, 2012
In Arizona, at least, the Birthers still haven’t gone away.
Open Limerick To Birthers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Even now, we hear Birthers contest
Barack’s birthplace with zealotous zest.
Though he’s won two elections
Their baseless objections
Persist. They should give it a rest.
Tags: Arizona, Arizona Electors, Barack Obama, Birthers, Don Ascoli, GOP Humor, Obama's Birth Certificate, Presidential Election, Republicans Humor, Tom Morrissey
Posted in Barack Obama, Birther Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Monday, December 10th, 2012
In the “fiscal cliff” negotiations, Republicans are irrationally demanding a hike in the Medicare eligibility age — what Nancy Pelosi refers to as “a trophy that the Republicans want.”
As Ezra Klein explains, this would not save money or help solve the health care cost problem, and it would hurt lots of people. Unfortunately, Republicans seem to favor symbolism over substance, and raising the Medicare eligibility age would be “a signal that they won something big on entitlements.”
Medicare Mishigas (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
GOPers want change that ain’t sage:
Raise the Medicare-el’gible age.
This does harm — won’t address
The health care cost mess:
It’s the fruit of entitlements-rage.
Tags: Entitlements, Ezra Klein, Fiscal Cliff, Fiscal Crisis, Fiscal Humor, GOP Humor, Health Care, Medicare Eligibility, Medicare Reform, Medicare Satire, Nancy Pelosi, Negotiations, Republicans Humor
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Legislation Humor, Medicare Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 4 Comments »
Saturday, November 17th, 2012
I know that I shouldn’t indulge in Schadenfreude, but I can’t help myself: Watching the Republican rats desert Mitt Romney’s sinking ship is immensely entertaining! And in my defense, Gail Collins seems to be enjoying it too.
Mitt Romney’s Sunken Ship Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mitt Romney is now on the outs.
Having lost in a rout, Romney pouts,
Making whiny remarks,
Giving GOP sharks
An excuse for disownership shouts.
Tags: Barack Obama, Bobby Jindal, Election Satire, Gail Collins, GOP Humor, Marco Rubio, Newt Gingrich, Presidential Election, Republicans Humor, Schadenfreude
Posted in Barack Obama, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Marco Rubio, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 6 Comments »
Thursday, November 8th, 2012
When a political party loses big time, the way the Republicans lost on Tuesday, there are two ways to go: 1) Careful introspection; or 2) Blame game. Guess which route the Republicans picked.
Finger Pointing Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican game is “cast blame.”
Faulting somebody else is their aim.
It’s Sandy! It’s Rove!
It’s Chris Christie, by Jove!
But they lost cuz the GOP’s lame.
Tags: Barack Obama, Blame Game, Chris Christie, Election 2012, Election Humor, Finger Pointing, GOP Humor, Hurricane Sandy, Karl Rove, Mitt Romney, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Blame Game, Campaign Humor, Chris Christie, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Karl Rove, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 4 Comments »