Trump’s “pussy” apology’s terse!
(The Donald is “sorry” averse.)
“You should give me your votes,”
He shamelessly notes.
“Elect ME, cuz her husband’s done worse.”
Posts Tagged ‘Campaign Satire’
Limerick Ode To A Sorry Apology
Saturday, October 8th, 2016Never Judge A Bloke By His Mild-Mannered Cover! (Limerick)
Thursday, October 6th, 2016Mike Pence is even worse on women’s health issues than I thought: As a Congressman, it was Pence who introduced the first bill to block Planned Parenthood funding. He even fathered the Republican habit of blocking essential bills and threatening government shutdowns over defunding Planned Parenthood. So it’s time for a limerick:
Trump’s a sexist, we rail and we fret,
But here’s something we’d best not forget:
Pence invented the scheme
V. Planned Parenthood. Scream
To the rafters: “Mike Pence is a threat!”
Trump’s True Talent (Limerick)
Thursday, October 6th, 2016Donald brags he’s a “genius” type laddie,
But at bus’ness, he’s naught but a baddie.
With his losses and grift,
What was Donald’s true gift?
Getting bailouts galore from his daddy.
Here’s some excellent investigative reporting from Newsweek’s Kurt Eichenwald: DONALD TRUMP’S TAX RECORDS: A TALE OF BUSINESS FAILURES.
Limerick Ode To Donald “The Genius” Trump
Sunday, October 2nd, 2016The Donald’s a genius? Who knew
That huge losses are great to accrue?
Though I’d be morose
From a deficit close
To one billion, for Trump it’s a coup.
Looking At The Lookist (Limerick)
Thursday, September 29th, 2016Donald swallowed Hill’s fat-shaming bait,
Which made him enraged and irate.
So he keeps lashing back
And confirms with each whack
That at lookism, Donald is great.
Going Mental (Limerick)
Sunday, September 25th, 2016I keep pacing, and ev’rything’s grating.
I barely can handle the waiting.
I’m shaky and dazed.
My mental state’s crazed.
How fortunate I’M not debating!
Open Limerick To The Press (3-Verse)
Thursday, September 22nd, 2016Will the media (including debate moderators) finally do its job during the upcoming presidential debates? My 3-verse open limerick to the press begs the media to do exactly that:
Dear press, that low bar you employ
Judging Trump must be raised. Don’t be coy.
If he hides some bad traits
In these crucial debates,
Don’t applaud Donald’s “pivot” with joy!
If he fails to behave like a clown
And he brings his high lying rate down,
Doesn’t act like a mad man,
Or Trump-bus’ness ad man,
Don’t hand him a pageantry crown.
Stop pretending that Trump’s not an ass.
Stop giving The Donald a pass.
It’s time to admit
That he’s clearly unfit
To be prez. Do your job! Show some brass!
When It Comes To Charitable Giving, Trump’s Favorite Cause Is Himself (Limerick)
Wednesday, September 21st, 2016Trump’s Foundation is largely a slush fund;
An illegal, though not very lush fund.
Although donors had meant
All their cash to be spent
Doing good, it’s a “Keep Donald Flush Fund.”
Don’t believe me? Need some background information? You owe it to yourself to start reading the Washington Post’s David Fahrenthold.
Transparency Madness (Limerick)
Thursday, September 15th, 2016Trump’s demands of opponents are vast;
Full disclosure, or else he’s aghast:
Proof of birth, health, and files
From their schools and huge piles
Of their emails, each speech. Do it fast!
But want data from Donald? You chump!
Don’t expect any document dump
Of his taxes and health
Or his “billions” in wealth;
Full disclosure’s for folks Not-Named-Trump.
Limerick Ode To Putin-Loving Trump
Friday, September 9th, 2016Donald’s concept of leadership’s thuggery
And his chief expertise is skulduggery.
Run our nation? That guy?
Just the thought makes me cry!
Trump belongs in a well-padded snuggery.
Paul LePage Is One For The Books (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 30th, 2016Whenever you read about Maine Governor Paul LePage’s crazy behavior, never forget this Boston.com headline from early August: “Donald Trump just gave Maine Gov. Paul LePage an open job offer.”
Paul LePage, who presides over Maine,
Seems unstable at best, or insane,
Which is probably why
Trump’s a fan of the guy.
They’re a match even hell can’t contain.
Read His Lips: Trump Isn’t A Racist (Limerick)
Wednesday, August 24th, 2016The Donald is mad — seeing red
Over claims that he’s gotten in bed
With supremacist wacks.
Seems his message to blacks
Is “forget each damn thing that he’s said.”
An End To The “Pivot” Spin? (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 16th, 2016Donald’s message: “I don’t want to pivot.”
Such a statement is certain to rivet
The Republican leaders–
Those desperate pleaders–
Will they somehow survive and out-live it?
Trump Wrote Another Limerick!
Sunday, August 14th, 2016The media’s biased, ill-bred,
And in bed with that crook who’s ahead.
If I lose, it’s the press
Who’s at fault for my mess.
How dare they report what I’ve said!
For Trump, Election Rigging is De Rigueur
Saturday, August 13th, 2016Trump Headline of the Day: “I’ll Only Lose With ‘Cheating,’ Asks Supporters To Watch Polling Places.”
As I explain in my 2-verse limerick, Trump’s urging supporters to intimidate Democratic voters:
In a nutshell, here’s Donald’s j’accuse:
“Only cheating can cause me to lose.
“Stop those people (sub-par) —
“You all know who they are —
“From stealing what’s mine.” What a ruse!
Don’t be fooled by the Trumpian spin.
Calls for action like that are a sin;
He’s encouraging fans
To make bullying plans,
Cuz it’s CHEATING Trump NEEDS for a WIN.
The Donald Trump Threat (Limerick)
Thursday, August 11th, 2016The Donald’s behavior is reckless.
It proves without doubt that he’s feckless.
His White House flirtation’s
A threat to all nations,
And I’d wager that Trump is full-deck-less.
Trump’s Killer of a Message (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 9th, 2016Donald Trump in the Oval Office? Imprisonment for threatening a fellow presidential candidate seems more appropriate to me.
Trump’s gun-loving supporters knew exactly what Trump meant, when he said this:
If she gets to pick her judges, nothing you can do folks. Although the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don’t know.
Did you hear the vile message Trump sent?
To the gun owners, here’s what he meant:
If Trump’s beaten by Hill,
Then their gun rights are nil–
Something only her death can prevent.
Delusional Donald (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 9th, 2016Will Delusional Donald debate?
Well of course, so folks see that he’s “great.”
Though he plays hard to get
With “conditions,” I’ll bet
He can’t wait; he’s so sure of his fate.
Trump’s Already Making Excuses For Losing The Election (Limerick)
Monday, August 1st, 2016There’s no end to the lies and abuses
That “The Donald” so often produces.
Here’s his latest deflection:
He fears the election
Is “rigged.” Trump — “Tycoon of Excuses!”
