Headeline: “No Big Macs for Putin as McDonald’s Halts Russia Operations”
(Which probably puts the kibosh on Trump’s visit to pal Putin)
*****
Yesterday temps got to 67 in NYC. Tomorrow they’re predicting snow.
I’m not sure what’s more erratic these days, weather or mail.
Seasoned Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s spring and the weather is mild.
Now it’s summer. The heat has me riled.
Autumn leaf-peaking thrills me,
And winter’s cold chills me.
All once true — now the weather’s just wild.
(My verse about global warming and climate change was prompted by “Time Counts” at We Write Poems.)
Congratulations to Dictionary.com for its excellent 2012 Word of the Year selection — Bluster. (Needless to say, its luster inspired a limerick.)
2012 saw the most expensive political campaigns and some of the most extreme weather events in human history, from floods in Australia to cyclones in China to Hurricane Sandy and many others. Man-made disasters spiraled as the European Central Bank continued to hem and haw over bailouts and austerity, and Greeks went to the polls after years of uncertainty. Even after many spilled words, the stability of the Euro fuels debate around the world. So what one word conveys these dominant trends of 2012? Bluster.
Limerick Bluster
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The wordies have managed to muster
An apt word for the year: It is “Bluster.”
Windy pols and big storms
Are Two-Thousand-Twelve norms—
Not to mention a big budget buster.
We’ve abused the earth,
so nature’s taking revenge–
naturally.
I don’t always make fun of politicians. I sometimes mock weathermen.
And no, heavy snow storms don’t turn global warming into a myth.
(The link goes to my other blog, where I post my non-political humor.)
Last week I managed to avoid the Balloon Boy media frenzy. Reality show participants with an endangered child on an AWOL helium balloon? Yeah … right. Then again, I don’t spend my time watching kids being rescued from wells either.
In any event, I’m not surprised that Wife Swap participants (and reality TV series pitchers) Richard and Mayumi Heene may be arrested for “concocting a publicity stunt by pretending that their young son [Falcon] had climbed aboard a homemade helium balloon and was hurtling through the skies above Fort Collins, Colo.”
The Heenes’ lawyer David Lane expects the Larimer County Sheriff’s Office to file charges this week, and Denver man Robert Thomas says Richard Heene gave him advance word of a media stunt.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Heinous Heenes?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Two publicity mongers named Heene
Are accused of a hoax quite obscene:
Claimed their wayward balloon
Held their child. Opportune
For a shot at “reality” green.
Update: I’ve heard the Heenes’ name pronounced three different ways, two of which screw up my rhyme scheme. Since I’m not sure which pronunciation is correct, I guess I’ll leave my limerick up as written.
Life in Washington, D.C. must be great! Otherwise, the D.C. Council would surely have better things to do than passing laws that require drivers to remove snow from their cars.
I’m not kidding. The D.C. Council has “unanimously approved emergency legislation that will require drivers to remove frozen snow and ice from their vehicles.”
But the good news is there’s no fine … yet … just a warning. A last minute amendment eliminated the fine “until a hearing can be held and council members can study laws in other jurisdictions.”
I love “Nanny State” laws, don’t you?
D.C. Snow Job
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I am guessing D.C. is crime free,
And that cops there are bored as can be.
How else to explain
A new law that’s insane:
Auto-snow is illegal debris.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her non-political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
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