Archive for the ‘Twitter’ Category

Roger Stone’s Bitter About Twitter (Limerick)

Sunday, October 29th, 2017

Why did Twitter suspend Roger Stone?
He sent tweets Twitter cannot condone.
Seems it’s wrong to abuse
Those who bring us the news;
Can’t spew shit-laden threats via phone.

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New Republican Slogan:

“Alms for the Rich and Arms for ALL”

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DeVos cut 72 guidelines for disabled students.

So serving a mentally disabled president hasn’t upped her empathy 4 the disabled.

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Lewandowski: Keep focus on ‘the continued lies of the Clinton administration’

And here I thought Trump was in the Oval. Silly me!

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NBCNews Tweet: “President Trump greets members of the press’ kids in Halloween costumes: ‘I cannot believe the media produced such beautiful children'”

Some day those children will be able to proudly tell THEIR children: “When I was your age, I met the USA’s WORST president ever!”

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Trump Tweet: “It is now commonly agreed, after many months of COSTLY looking, that there was NO collusion between Russia and Trump. Was collusion with HC!”

At the start of your tweet, you seem to have left out a few key words: “In the Trump family.”

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Trump Tweet: “Wacky & totally unhinged Tom Steyer, who has been fighting me and my Make America Great Again agenda from beginning, never wins elections!”

Steyer “unhinged?” You’ve got that backwards. Steyer’s spent $10 million for a TV ad campaign advocating your impeachment because YOU’RE unhinged.

Also, unlike YOU, Steyer’s “REALLY RICH.”

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Headline: “Trump: ‘Really great advertising’ will keep kids off drugs.”

Also from Trump: “If we can teach young people not to take drugs … it’s really, really easy not to take them.”

All this from the purported non-drinker who’s driving the rest of us to drink.

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Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Thursday, October 5th, 2017

Dear Donald, the news isn’t fiction.
So enough with your “made up” depiction!
It’s your tweets that are fake;
You’re a bum, liar, snake!
How I ache for your fel’ny conviction.

Tweeter-In-Chief (Limerick)

Sunday, August 27th, 2017

The Donald’s still busily tweeting
Whiny drivel and self-serving bleating.
I guess “Sheriff” John Kelly
Let Trump keep his telly…
Which means LOTS more Trump Twitter-excreting.

Tweeter-In-Chief Trump Outdoes Himself (Limerick)

Monday, June 5th, 2017

The Donald has once again binged
On tweets, best described as unhinged.
Even folks who support
His positions exhort
Him to stop, having read ’em & cringed.

He’s BACK! (Limerick)

Sunday, May 28th, 2017

The Donald’s back bashing the press
After making a terrible mess
Of his meetings with leaders,
Relieving his readers
Of tweet-storm withdrawal distress.

Trump’s Russian-Probe Freak-Out (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 28th, 2017

The Donald’s been tweeting up a storm over the probe of Trump’s Russia connections.

“Any claims about Russia and me
Are a hoax” — Donald’s latest tweet-spree.
“It’s Hill you should probe!”
Was he wearing a robe
When he threw up this Twitter debris?

Literal Liar-In-Chief? (Limerick)

Monday, March 13th, 2017

Donald’s spokespeople baldly pretend
That the wiretap tweet that he penned
Needs no “Sorry! My bad!”
Seems we’re stark-raving mad;
Misconstruing lies Trump likes to send.

So Much For That Pivot (3-Verse Limerick)

Saturday, March 4th, 2017

At his speech Tuesday night, Trump seemed sane.
His proposals still sucked, but his brain
And behavior looked stable.
(Less time watching cable?)
Fawning pundits were ably inane:

Trump’s “pivot” was praised by the press,
Who perceived “presidential” finesse.
Heavy meds (I assume)
Might explain his brief bloom
Into something much less of a mess.

But his meds have worn off, I conclude,
Based on stark-raving tweets that he spewed
Just today. Yes his feed
On Twitter indeed
Proves our leader’s a bleeping-mad dude.

Trump’s Favorite Outlet (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 15th, 2017

When Donald gets bitter or pissed,
You can bet he’ll be shaking his fist
Via tweet-storming rants
About leakers and plants.
Before Twitter, how DID he exist?

Trump On Exhibit (Limerick)

Saturday, February 11th, 2017

Trump exhibits his madness with ease,
Via speeches and tweet-tantrum sprees.
Donald’s saneness is wee
And he’s vain as can be.
It’s as plain as his gold Trump marquees.

Those Slippery Polls (Limerick)

Monday, February 6th, 2017

“Any negative polls are fake news.
(Trump on Twitter, expressing his views.)
Yet he can’t explain why
When his numbers are high
They’re plumb right, but when low they’re a ruse.

Open Limerick To Donald Trump (2-Verse)

Saturday, December 17th, 2016

Dear Donald: Stop bragging and gloating
And mischaracterizing the voting.
Show some dignity. Preening
And boasting’s demeaning.
And so is your crude self-promoting.

You have pulled off remarkable feats,
So enough with the paranoid bleats.
Think twice before speaking
And enemy-tweaking.
And try NOT to launch wars with your tweets!

For Donald, Pettiness Trumps All (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 6th, 2016

It seems likely that Trump’s fact-free, market-skewing anti-Boeing tweet was spurred by yet another petty vendetta. (How dare Boeing’s CEO criticize Trump’s anti-China bluster!)

Donald tweets without int’rest or care
As to damage he’ll cause with each blare.
Petty grievance-borne views
Spark vendetta-spurred spews.
Spook markets? Start wars? C’est la guerre!

Limerick Ode To Sniveling Donald

Tuesday, November 22nd, 2016

Pre-election, The Donald went wild
With tweets that were petty and riled.
Since he won, there’s no sign
Of a whine-rate decline.
Face the facts: We’ve elected a child.

Trump To The Rescue (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 13th, 2015

Headline of the Day: “Donald Trump Will Live-Tweet CNN’s Democratic Debate.”

Will the Dem debate generate heat?
Will someone go down in defeat?
Well if points aren’t scored,
And you start to get bored,
You can always watch Donald Trump tweet.

Something For Trump To Tweet About (6-Verse Limerick)

Tuesday, August 25th, 2015

Something For Trump To Tweet About (6-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump loves to post petulant tweets,
Whiny diatribes, vengeance-spurred bleats.
So his Twitter feed’s littered
With comments, embittered;
From a feud Donald never retreats.

If anyone else posted guff
Like Trump, (s)he’d be kicked in the duff–
Quickly out of a job
And shamed by a mob–
But when Trump does it, folks say, “Hot stuff!”

Groundless grievances gin up his life.
He thrives on them, loving the strife
He creates every day
With his vicious display.
Just imagine it — being Trump’s wife!

Within what other country could Trump,
A boorish, vindictive old grump,
With “huge” secret plans
Attract so many fans,
Who greet him with cheers on the stump?

I fear for our wonderful nation,
Filled with folks who think Trump’s our salvation;
This man who dispenses
Such daily offenses
Somehow fills them with endless elation.

Please tell me The Donald can’t win,
Cuz the drumbeat for Trump is a sin.
You might as well vote
For “Drunk Unc” or a goat…
And a goat, unlike Trump, has thick skin.

Hillary Clinton Joins Twitter (Limerick)

Monday, June 10th, 2013

Hillary Clinton Joins Twitter (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

@HillaryClinton is here
Right on Twitter, so give her a cheer.
Both witty & classy,
Supremely bad-assy
And fearless – a gal without peer.

#My2k Limerick

Thursday, November 29th, 2012

#My2k Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s new hashtag is meant
2 help middle class taxpayers vent
Via tweets 2 demand
That their tax hike is banned:
#My2k’s needed 4 rent.

(You can find the story about Obama’s social media PR efforts and this “fiscal cliff” related hashtag here.)

Romney and the Blowhard (Limerick)

Friday, June 1st, 2012

This Donald Trump quote sounds fictitious, but it’s real: “I have a very large Twitter.”

Romney and the Blowhard (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump is proud of his “very large Twitter.”
(That’s a quote — not a Mad B Kane titter.)
When The Donald ain’t ragging
The prez, then he’s bragging.
Donald Trump — he’s where Mitt turns for glitter.

A Tale Of Two Kims (Limerick)

Monday, December 19th, 2011

It’s hard not to laugh at the confusion caused by Kim Jong-il’s demise:

Yes, in the wake of the passing of Kim Jong Il, some Twitter users seemingly believe that the female rapper Lil’ Kim had died instead.

On Twitter, amusing confusion—
Lil’ Kim devotees — wrong conclusion.
Kim Jong-il’s death was met
With deep shock and regret.
Seem’s Kim’s music can cause mass delusion.