Trump Tweet: “PRESIDENTIAL HARASSMENT!”
Donald whines both on Twitter and cable:
“I am being harassed!” (That’s a fable.)
Yet his base seems to buy
Trump’s self-branded “Tough Guy!” —
A strange label for one so unstable.
Archive for the ‘Republicans Humor’ Category
Whiner-In-Chief (Limerick)
Thursday, May 23rd, 2019Grassley’s Gonna Sit Right Down and Write The Prez a Letter
Tuesday, May 14th, 2019From the Washington Post, re Trump’s tariffs:
“Senate Finance Committee Chairman Charles E. Grassley (R-Iowa) said he planned to write a letter to Trump to explain the concerns of farmers because he felt the argument he had repeatedly made to the president in person was not registering.”
I apologize to Ahlert and Young for these song parody lyrics:
I’m gonna sit right down and write the Prez a letter
And make believe that Trump can read.
I’m gonna write words, oh, so sweet.
They’re gonna help guys growing wheat.
A lotta kisses on Trump’s bottom.
He’ll be glad he got ’em.
I’m gonna smile and say I hope he’ll end his tariffs.
Then I’ll close with love the way I do.
I’m gonna sit right down and write to help the farmers.
And pray my letter helps me too.
Don Jr. Is Lucky It’s JUST A Subpoena (Limerick)
Sunday, May 12th, 2019Like Rachel Maddow, I think Don Jr. is lucky it’s JUST a subpoena. (He could have been hit with a perjury indictment referral like other such liars.)
Poor Donald Trump Jr. is mad;
A subpoena’s been served on the lad.
But he’s dodged a referral
For perj’ry — demurral?!?
He should THANK Richard Burr and be glad!
Trump’s Tariff Whopper (Limerick)
Sunday, May 12th, 2019Donald Trump likes to brag and enthrall,
By claiming his tariffs are all
Paid by China — a LIE
That his base seems to buy…
Just like Mexico’s paid for the wall.
“Case” Not So “Closed” (Limerick)
Thursday, May 9th, 2019“Members of President Trump’s inner circle are frustrated that the Republican-led Senate Intelligence Committee subpoenaed Donald Trump Jr.,” according to CNN.
It’s over and done, so “case closed,”
Says McConnell, yet Burr has imposed
A subpoena on one
Of Trump’s sons. (NOT so done!)
Here’s hoping Don Jr. is hosed.
I Dislike Likability (Limerick)
Sunday, May 5th, 2019Headline: “Is ‘Likability’ Biased Towards Men?”
“Likability” — what a odd word;
It appears that most any male turd
Can be deemed by the press
As more likable — yes —
Than a non-turd-like female. Absurd!
Whiner-In-Chief (Limerick)
Sunday, May 5th, 2019Headline: “Trump: 2 years of my term were ‘stollen’”
The first half of Trump’s term has been “stollen,”
Complains Donald by tweet; he is all-in
On his claim of harassment.
His Twitter amassment
Of gripes shows the guy can’t stop bawlin’.
Trump Testy Over Mueller Testimony (Limerick)
Sunday, May 5th, 2019Headline: “Trump Objects to Mueller Testifying Before Congress”
Donald Trump is beginning to panic
Over threats to a long reign, tyrannic:
What has roused Donald’s fear?
Mueller’s said he’ll appear
Before Congress. (Cue terror volcanic.)
Our Lawless President (Limerick)
Wednesday, April 24th, 2019Trump delays and defies and he sues;
His flawed policy’s thwart and refuse.
Tell him “Follow the law,”
And he’ll yell or guffaw.
Don’t believe it? Try reading real news.
Republicans Scan Mueller Report … And Shrug (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 23rd, 2019Have Republican consciences shrunk
To the point where the GOP’s sunk?
Donald’s Senator/flunkies
Scan Mueller like junkies
Who (strung out on Trump) deem it bunk.
Trump Tweets Out Notre-Dame Fire-Fighting Advice (Limerick)
Monday, April 15th, 2019Apparently, Trump is all-knowing;
“I’m an expert,” he’s constantly crowing.
Be it fires or war,
Don’t ask pros; Trump knows more!
For the Donald’s sole gift is horn-blowing.
Mayor Pete v. Pence (Limerick)
Friday, April 12th, 2019There’s a Mike Pence/Pete Buttigieg feud
Cuz the Veep is an anti-gay dude,
Who pretends to be pious
To justify bias…
As he praises a Prez, crude and lewd.
Limerick Ode To Roger Stone’s Woes (Two-Verse)
Friday, April 12th, 2019Headline: “Roger Stone’s woes: He’s broke. Donald Trump doesn’t call. And his wife broke her ankle.”
Poor Roger — he claims that he’s broke.
Are we s’posed to feel bad for that bloke?
He’s been gagged and is under
Indictment; his blunder
Is breaking the law. What a joke!
Roger Stone also whines that he misses
Good pal Donald. (No calls, hugs, or kisses?)
What a horror he paints;
Roger’s full of complaints.
But I find it quite easy to diss his.
Trump’s Fiendish, Foolish, Fullness Ploy (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 9th, 2019Headline: “Trump Says the U.S. Is ‘Full.’ Much of the Nation Has the Opposite Problem.”
Says the Donald, the U.S. is “full!”
As always, Trump’s trying to pull
A fast one, to stir
Up his base and deter
Immigration — Trump’s typical bull.
Kirstjen Nielsen, Buh-Bye! (Limerick)
Monday, April 8th, 2019Donald’s infamous Child-Caging Queen
Has been fired by Trump. Some might glean
That the caging is why
She’s been dumped, but (oh, my!)
Seems the Sec’s insufficiently mean.
Trump’s “Complete And Total Exoneration” (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 2nd, 2019New York Magazine Headline: “Trump Aides Fear He Is Overselling His ‘Exoneration’”
Trump lies, as he brags to our nation
That he’s gotten complete vindication
From the Mueller Report,
While some staffers exhort:
Don’t distort please, in worried frustration.
Trump Ruins Another Holiday (Limerick)
Monday, April 1st, 2019I have failed, despite numerous tries
To concoct some good holiday lies
For April the First.
But with Donald we’re cursed,
And the President’s lies take the prize.
Meaner Than Mean (Limerick)
Thursday, March 28th, 2019The Donald is meaner than mean.
His venom is base and obscene.
He’s perniciously vicious
And cruelly seditious…
Wreaking havoc while venting his spleen.
