Archive for the ‘Mark Sanford’ Category
Wednesday, May 1st, 2013
Even though I have no use for porn, I do have a soft spot for Hustler publisher Larry Flynt.
Why?
1: Throughout the George W. Bush administration, he linked to my parody Dubya’s Dayly Diary from the home page of his personal site.
2: Larry Flynt is a lefty who pulls the occasional very amusing stunt.
Larry Flynt’s latest caper is an obviously satirical endorsement of former South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford in his race against Democrat Elizabeth Colbert Busch for U.S. Congress.
He couldn’t possibly have given Elizabeth Colbert Busch a lovelier gift.
Sanford, who gained national prominence in 2009 as governor of South Carolina when he abruptly abandoned his duties for a secret rendezvous with his mistress, is currently running against Democrat Elizabeth Colbert Busch for South Carolina’s 1st Congressional District seat. The election will take place on May 7.
In a statement released today, Flynt calls Sanford “the sex pioneer of our time.” In Flynt’s eyes “no one has done more to expose the sexual hypocrisy of traditional values in America today. Sanford’s open embrace of his mistress in the name of love, breaking his sacred marriage vows, was an act of bravery that has drawn my support.” Chastising the Republican Party for not backing Sanford following his run-off victory, Flynt declared: “I am willing to step in and stand erect for Mark Sanford.”
An Endorsement Mark Sanford Hopes Nobody Will Notice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man known for porn — Larry Flynt
Has endorsed Gov. Mark Sanford in print,
As a “sex pioneer,”
With a glint and a leer.
Endorsements like this you can’t mint.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Congress Humor, Election Humor, Elizabeth Colbert Busch, Endorsements Humor, George W. Bush, Larry Flynt, Mark Sanford, Media Humor, Porn Humor, Republicans Humor, South Carolina
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Mark Sanford, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, September 17th, 2009
South Carolina’s Governor Mark Sanford sure has expensive travel habits for such a “frugal conservative.”
The Not-So-Frugal Traveler (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Making staffers use each Post-It side,
Mark Sanford would wastefulness chide.
Then he’d charter a plane,
Throwing cash down the drain.
Sanford sure took his state for a ride.
Related Posts: Ode to Mark “Sweet Talker” Sanford; Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy; and Mark Sanford — Lost? Or Losing It?
Tags: Conservatives Satire, Frugality, Governor Sanford, Philanderers, Planes, Republican Hypocrisy, South Carolina, Travel Expenses, Womanizers
Posted in GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor, Wingnuts | Comments Off on Mark Sanford, The Not-So-Frugal Traveler
Saturday, July 11th, 2009
Senator John Ensign surely celebrated when Governor Mark Sanford’s soul-mate scandal took Ensign’s sex-capade off Page 1.
But not for long! Ensign’s scandal is back, and it’s better than ever:
Dueling Scandals (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Some scandals appear to be fleeting,
Like Ensign’s with Sanford competing.
But Ensign’s is back
With his pay-off scheme flack.
Guess whose scandal is next — please, no cheating.
Tags: Governor Sanford, Media Humor, Nevada, Philanderers, Republicans Humor, Scandals, Senator Ensign, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, John Ensign, Mark Sanford, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Scandals Humor, South Carolina Humor | Comments Off on Dueling Scandals
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009
South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford shouldn’t resign because he’s an unfaithful, lying, hypocrite … although he’s all that and more. He should resign because he’s a moron! Only a blithering idiot could, in one breath, publicly describe his lover as his “soul mate” and, in the next breath, vow to salvage his marriage and fall back in love with his wife, Jenny.
Ode to Mark “Sweet Talker” Sanford
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Sanford, you need to stay mum
Cuz your statements are dumb as they come.
Tell me: Why would your wife
Take you back in this life,
When your soul mate’s another? You bum!
Tags: Jenny Sanford, Mark Sanford, Philanderers, Scandals, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 3 Comments »
Sunday, June 28th, 2009
I’ve heard some twisted rationalizations over the years. But Rush Limbaugh’s attempt at blaming Obama for Mark Sanford’s failings really takes the cake.
A double limerick, just for Rush Limbaugh:
De-Moralized?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Rush claims that Obama’s to blame
For Sanford’s disgrace and his shame:
The stimulus bill
Destroyed Sanford’s will.
Wow, even for Limbaugh, that’s lame.
When a Democrat strays — no excuse!
Just right-wing attacks and abuse.
But conservative sins
Are spinned — turned to wins.
Try to reason with Rush? It’s no use!
Tags: Democrats, Hypocrisy, Limbaugh, Mark Sanford, Media, Obama, Philanderers, Radio, Republicans Humor, Scandals, Sins, Stimulus, Talk Shows, Womanizers
Posted in Barack Obama, Blame Game, Family Values Humor, Fiscal Policy, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Radio Humor, Republicans Humor, Rush Limbaugh | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, June 24th, 2009
All the explanations for Gov. Mark Sanford’s absence — the recharging, the writing, the catching up on projects, the naked Appalachian Trail hiking — are officially inoperative. Come to think of it, Sanford did take a hike — from his obligations to his wife and family and to his constituents.
A secret Argentinean affair! Wow! You have to give the righteous Republican Brownie points for creativity:
Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The myst’ry of Sanford is solved.
We have learned an affair is involved.
Argentinean tryst!
Now that’s quite a twist.
Say goodbye to his Prez hopes. Dissolved!
Tags: Affairs, Argentina, Governors, Hypocrisy, Mark Sanford, Philanderers, Republicans Humor, Scandals, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009
I don’t know what’s weirder — the fact that South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford’s been missing since Thursday, or that his wife doesn’t seem at all worried.
Mark Sanford — Lost? Or Losing It? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Sanford — oh let’s call him Mark —
Has left his whole state in the dark.
He’s gone missing, they say.
Can they reach him? No way!
Is he nuts, or just lost in some park?
Update: Here’s my favorite rumor about South Carolina’s missing governor: Mark Sanford may have been hiking naked.
Update 2: Now that Governor Sanford’s fessed up to an Argentinean tryst, I’ve written him another limerick.
Tags: Mark Sanford, South Carolina
Posted in Governors Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 2 Comments »
Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy
Wednesday, June 24th, 2009All the explanations for Gov. Mark Sanford’s absence — the recharging, the writing, the catching up on projects, the naked Appalachian Trail hiking — are officially inoperative. Come to think of it, Sanford did take a hike — from his obligations to his wife and family and to his constituents.
A secret Argentinean affair! Wow! You have to give the righteous Republican Brownie points for creativity:
Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The myst’ry of Sanford is solved.
We have learned an affair is involved.
Argentinean tryst!
Now that’s quite a twist.
Say goodbye to his Prez hopes. Dissolved!
Tags: Affairs, Argentina, Governors, Hypocrisy, Mark Sanford, Philanderers, Republicans Humor, Scandals, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 4 Comments »