Archive for the ‘Health Satire’ Category
Saturday, October 31st, 2009
One of the silliest Republican (and Fox News) talking points is that the Democratic health reform bill is too long. Fox News Live Desk’s Trace Gallagher seems especially fond of it, making repeated (and inaccurate) comparisons to Tolstoy’s War and Peace. (Well, we always knew that Fox is fond of fiction.)
“Short On Facts” Fox (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When on substance your grasp just ain’t strong,
Simply bitch that the health bill’s too long.
“War and Peace is much shorter,”
Rants Trace (Fox “reporter”),
And even on that Fox is wrong.
Tags: Fox News, Health Reform, Law Satire, Legislation Satire, Leo Tolstoy, Literature Humor, Media, Russian Novels, Talking Points, Trace Gallagher
Posted in Fox News Humor, Health Satire, Legislation Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Television (TV) Satire | Comments Off on “Short On Facts” Fox
Thursday, October 29th, 2009
Traitor Joe Lieberman is back to his old tricks, once again trying to undermine Democrats. So how’s Joe rewarding Obama and Harry Reid’s excessive generosity in letting Lieberman caucus with the Dems and chair the Homeland Security Committee? By threatening to help Republicans filibuster health reform over the public option.
Joe Lieberman’s latest misanthropic behavior reminds me of the single saving grace in Bush v. Gore: The election was stolen from Lieberman too.
I’ve already written Joe a song parody, so now it’s time for a limerick:
A Limerick For Traitor Joe
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Joe Lieberman’s meanness runs deep.
He’s a back-stabbing, Dem-screwing creep,
Who’s determined to kill
The health reform bill.
But at least he will never be VEEP.
Tags: Bush v. Gore, Filibuster, Harry Reid, Health Reform, Homeland Security, Joe Lieberman, Public Option, Traitors
Posted in Barack Obama, Filibuster Humor, Harry Reid, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Joe Lieberman, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Washington | 6 Comments »
Tuesday, October 20th, 2009
Recent comments by Sen. Jay Rockefeller and others indicate
that a strong public option could become a reality, if only President Obama stopped being a Bystander President.
Bystander President? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Public option’s at stake — tock, tick, tock.
Please step up to the plate, Dear Barack.
Though the sidelines were cool
For a while, you’re a fool
If you fail to ensure it’s a lock.
Related Posts: Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg; Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Health Care Reform, Jay Rockefeller, Legislation Satire, Obama Verse, Public Option
Posted in Barack Obama, Health Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, White House | Comments Off on Bystander President?
Saturday, September 19th, 2009
Wendell Potter, the former health insurance industry executive-turned-whistleblower, presents a scathing analysis of the Max Baucus health reform plan.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Balking At The Baucus Bill
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Baucus, your health plan’s so bad,
Can’t decide if you’re dim or a cad.
Cuz the garbage disposal
Befits your proposal.
You’re driving us real Dems quite mad.
Related Posts: Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg; Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Health Reform, Insurance Reform, Max Baucus, Wendell Potter
Posted in Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Max Baucus, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Senate Satire | 1 Comment »
Monday, September 14th, 2009
Just when you thought it was safe to take a shower, here’s a health scare that would make Alfred Hitchcock turn pale:
Bathing In Bad News (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Are health reports making you glower?
Is the swine flu bug making you cower?
Then get ready to frown
At the new scare in town:
Deadly germs in the head of your shower.
Tags: Bacteria, Disease, Health Humor, Immune Systems, Mycobacterium Avium, Shower Safety, Showerheads, Swine Flu
Posted in Health Satire, Scary News, Science Verse | 4 Comments »
Thursday, September 3rd, 2009
New Hampshire’s Senator Judd Gregg, a big “majority rules” fan back when Republicans held the majority, has suddenly become a minority rights advocate. I just can’t imagine why.
Way back when, Gregg was enthused about using filibuster-proof reconciliation rules to pass ANWR drilling legislation:
… “The point, of course, is this: If you have 51 votes for your position, you win,” Gregg told his Senate colleagues on the floor.
He added, “Reconciliation is a rule of the Senate (that) has been used before for purposes exactly like this on numerous occasions… Is there something wrong with majority rules? I don’t think so.”
Responding to the argument that it’s wrong to use reconciliation on a domestic oil drilling measure, Gregg concluded, “We are using the rules of the Senate as they are set up to be used, and that happens to be the rule of the Senate.”
Of course now that there’s a Democratic majority, Gregg has a rather different opinion and is leading the Republican fight against passing health care reform under reconciliation rules:
Sen. Judd Gregg has hundreds of procedural objections ready for a healthcare plan Democrats leaders want to speed through the Senate.
Gregg (N.H.), the senior Republican on the Budget Committee, told the Hill in a recent interview that Republicans will wage a vicious fight if Democrats try to circumvent Senate rules and use a budget maneuver to pass a trillion dollar healthcare plan with a simple majority. […]
Gregg said that Republicans could file “hundreds” of points of order objections to the bill, each one requiring 60 votes to waive.
“We are very much engaged in taking a hard look at our rights under reconciliation,” Gregg said. “It would be very contentious.”
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Majority rule is just great,”
Said Gregg in the drilling debate.
“You’ve got 51 votes,
Then you win.” Check his quotes.
Yet 51 Dem votes don’t rate.
Related Posts: Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: ANWR Oil Drilling, Filibusters, Health Care Reform, Health Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Majority Rules, Minority Rights, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, August 18th, 2009
Watching Republicans out-maneuver President Obama on “bi-partisan” health care reform has been so painful, I sometimes feel forced to avert my eyes. So I’ve written this open double limerick to President Obama:
An Open Limerick To President Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Obama, the GOP’s clear:
Won’t support any health reform. Hear?
You can whittle the bill
Down to bupkis — you still
Won’t get votes. Yes they’ve duped you, I fear.
Your naivety’s hurting our cause.
And so how about taking a pause?
Work with Dems on the Hill
To create a fresh bill
That has nary a GOP clause.
Related Posts: Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Bipartisanship, Democrats Humor, GOP Lies, Health Care, Health Reform, Legislation Satire, Negotiations, Obama Verse, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 7 Comments »
Sunday, August 16th, 2009
Republican hypocrisy is stunning. Almost everyone who’s been throwing around the “death panel” epithet used to have a very different opinion of end-of-life-care planning:
1) Back in her half-term as Alaska governor, Sarah Palin spoke out for advance healthcare directives in her 2008 Healthcare Decision Day Proclamation.
2) Rush Limbaugh enthusiastically read ad copy championing LegalZoom.com, whose services include do-it-yourself living wills.
3) Newt Gingrich recently advocated for advance directives (end-of-life planning) in his July 2nd Washington Post column.
4) Most Senate and House Republicans voted to fund counseling for end-of-life issues and care in George W. Bush’s 2003 Medicare prescription drug bill.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Sarah and Limbaugh and Newt,
Put your “death panel” nonsense on mute.
Cuz you once were big fans
Of end-of-life plans.
Were they “death panels” too? Now please scoot!
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Death Panels, End-of-Life Care, Health Care Reform, Health Humor, Healthcare Directives, Living Wills, Medicare Satire, Newt Gingrich, Republican Hypocrisy, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin Limerick
Posted in GOP Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin | 3 Comments »
Thursday, August 6th, 2009
Planning to attend a local town hall meeting about health care reform? Hoping to learn something and to express your opinion?
Well, be sure to bring a pair of ear plugs. Because the only thing you’re likely to hear is an enraged, screaming mob. And the only thing you’re likely to learn is that it’s frustrating and possibly dangerous to be a Democratic Congressperson.
Here’s my limerick about the right-wing scheme to stifle intelligent discussion of the issues by inciting angry mobs to shout down these meetings.
Tantrum Politics
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If reform can’t be fought using facts,
Simply give civil discourse the ax.
Block discussion with mobs
Packed with morons like Dobbs.
That’s the path of Republican hacks.
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Congress Humor, Health Care, Insurance Reform, Lou Dobbs, Mobs, Scare Tactics, Tantrums, Town Hall Meetings
Posted in Congress Humor, Democracy Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, August 4th, 2009
Back in July, South Carolina Senator Jim DeMint bragged about Republican plans to “break” Obama. How? By killing health care reform, turning health care into Obama’s “Waterloo.”
So it’s no surprise that the President’s foes are wielding the Big Lie in their non-stop efforts to block reform. Or that their lies target the elderly, scaring them into thinking Democrats intend to mandate elder-euthanasia.
This brings me to my latest limerick, Waterloo Lies:
Waterloo Lies
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP’s spreading big lies
To ensure that our health reform dies:
“The bill will kill gran —
Shorten seniors’ life span.”
Their goal? Cut Barack down to size.
Update: Check out the interesting and informative Health Wonk Review.
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Tantrum Politics
Tags: Big Lie, Elderly, Euthanasia, Health Care, Insurance Reform, Jim DeMint, Obama, Reform, Republicans Humor, Scare Tactics, South Carolina, Waterloo
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, James DeMint, Legislation Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, South Carolina Humor, White House | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009
Life would be ever so much easier, if only RNC Chairman Michael Steele had Barack Obama’s gig. For instance, we’d be able to solve our health care problems in a nanosecond:
STEELE: So if it’s a cost problem, it’s easy: Get the people in a room who have the most and the most direct impact on cost, and do the deal. Do the deal. It’s not that complicated.
If it’s an access question, people don’t have access to health care, then figure out who they are, and give them access! Hello?! Am I missing something here? …
And so it’s time for yet another Michael Steele limerick:
Steeley Plan For Health Care
By Madeleine Begun Kane
U.S. health reform’s easy, says Steele.
Simply get in a room — do the deal.
Whether access or cost
Is the problem, accost
Those involved, do the deal, and get real.
Tags: Health Reform, Negotiation, RNC, Steele
Posted in Health Satire, Michael Steele, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor | 3 Comments »
Sunday, April 26th, 2009
For such a fan of secession, Texas Gov. Rick Perry sure is quick to ask for federal bucks. Hurricane disaster assistance? Check. Antiviral medications to combat swine flu? Check.
Now I live just two miles from the Fresh Meadows, Queens, New York swine flu outbreak at St. Francis Prep School. And I’m all for sending swine flu meds to needy areas like Texas. I just wish Texas didn’t have such a hypocrite for a governor.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Secession? Did I Say Secession?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My Texas is quite independent,
Said Rick Perry — secession-defendant.
Then he called for the feds
To send anti-flu meds.
With hypocrisy Perry’s resplendent.
Tags: Antiviral Medications, Disaster Assistance, Flu Vaccine, Fresh Meadows, Health, Hurricane, Hypocrisy, New York, Queens, Rick Perry, Secession, St. Francis Prep, Swine Flu, Texas
Posted in Health Satire, New York Politics, Political Limericks, Rick Perry, Texas Humor | 11 Comments »
Monday, February 2nd, 2009
First Tim Geithner, and now Tom Daschle. Anyone else getting tired of rich, powerful people failing to pay taxes, saying “Oops! Sorry! My bad!” and getting away with it?
Geithner’s already gotten his big promotion to Treasury Secretary in Obama’s Cabinet. And I’m betting that after pretending to give Tom Daschle a hard time, the Senate will soon give its former Majority Leader his Health and Human Services Secy gig too.
Just one question: May I join the Tax Defaulters Club, if I promise to pay up in the event I’m ever tapped for high office?
I didn’t think so.
Only Peons Have To Pay Taxes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m so sick of political sleaze
Who think they can do as they please.
Pay their taxes? Not them!
Be they right-wing or Dem,
With big friends their promotion’s a breeze.
Update: Daschle has withdrawn. Good! How about Howard Dean?
Tags: Daschle, Geithner, Health Secretary, Obama's Cabinet, Treasury
Posted in Barack Obama, Democrats Satire, Health Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Tim Geithner, Tom Daschle | 5 Comments »
Thursday, October 16th, 2008
Sarcastic air-quotes around “health” in “health of the mother”? Who the hell uses sarcastic air-quotes anymore … let alone when referring to women’s health? Big mistake, Senator McCain!
Which reminds me — during last night’s debate I had a revelation about the gravitas-test versus the guy-you’d-enjoy-having-a-beer-with-test. In this year’s election, gravitas-guy (Obama) is also the fellow I’d enjoy having a beer with … if only I liked beer:
Ode To John “Air-Quotes” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Many voters ask: Whose views are best,
As opposed to the drinking-pal test.
But whichever the measure,
Obama’s my pleasure.
McCain? He’s a cranky old pest.
Tags: Air Quotes, Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Drinking Pals, Election Humor, McCain Verse, Mother's Health, Obama poem, Presidential Election, Sarcasm, Women's Health
Posted in Abortion Rights, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, Health Satire, John McCain, Social Satire | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, April 8th, 2008
Hey, cable honchos. Before lambasting Hillary for “failing to fact check,” you might consider dabbling in some fact checking yourselves.
I’m referring, of course, to the media’s dead hospital patient mock-fest and, more broadly, to the “Gore-ing” of Hillary Clinton.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Biased Journalists And Bloggers, Heal Thyselves
By Madeleine Begun Kane
In cov’rage quite sloppy at best,
The press attacked Hill’ry with zest,
Disputing her facts.
But ’twas they who were lax.
Cuz if Clinton says east they say west.[tags]Biased Bloggers, Sloppy Journalists, Senator Clinton, Press Fact Checking, Presidential Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Health Humor, Media Limerick[/tags]
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Health Satire, Hillary Clinton, Lefty Blogger News, Media Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, White House | 6 Comments »
Tuesday, October 9th, 2007
At long last, the real reason George W. Bush vetoed SCHIP:
SCHIP HAIKU
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bush vetoed S-CHIP
Cuz he had a better plan:
No Child Left Alive.
(You can find more of my health humor here.)
Update:
Ayn Clouter seasons
Her blog with parody poems,
Inspiring laughter.
Why did I post a haiku about Ayn Clouter? Because she responded to my SCHIP haiku with some haiku of her own. [tags]SCHIP Humor, Children’s Health Insurance Plan[/tags]
Posted in George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, SCHIP Humor, White House | 14 Comments »
Saturday, July 21st, 2007
Requisite Bush colonoscopy snark:
Dick Cheney’s in charge
While George Bush is unconscious.
How’s this day different…?
(You can find more of my news haiku here.) [tags]President Bush, VP Cheney, Bush Colonoscopy, Bush Snark, Politics Haiku [/tags]
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 3 Comments »
Thursday, June 21st, 2007
Bush stem cell veto
Kills the hopes of the ailing,
Says “no” to science.
=========
So, have you entered my latest limerick writing contest yet? The one over at my other (non-political humor) blog? The deadline is June 27, the topic is money, and I’m even awarding a couple of small cash prizes. [tags]Stem Cell Research, Bush Veto, Health Research, Science, Scientific Research[/tags]
Posted in George Bush Satire, Health Satire, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Science Verse, White House | Comments Off on Bush Stems Progress (Haiku)
Tuesday, February 20th, 2007
By now, you’ve surely read the two-part Washington Post story about the abysmal treatment Iraq War veterans are receiving at Walter Reed Army Medical Center:
Why Does George Bush Hate Our Troops?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Where’s the medical aid for our troops?
When they’re injured, they’re treated like dupes.
Those who’ve lost arm or leg
Need our help, yet must beg
Us for care, forced to hurtle through hoops. [tags]George Bush, Troops, Iraq War, Medical Care, Injured Veterans, Walter Reed Army Medical Center[/tags]
Posted in Foreign Policy, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Iraq War Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 6 Comments »
A Limerick For Traitor Joe
Thursday, October 29th, 2009Traitor Joe Lieberman is back to his old tricks, once again trying to undermine Democrats. So how’s Joe rewarding Obama and Harry Reid’s excessive generosity in letting Lieberman caucus with the Dems and chair the Homeland Security Committee? By threatening to help Republicans filibuster health reform over the public option.
Joe Lieberman’s latest misanthropic behavior reminds me of the single saving grace in Bush v. Gore: The election was stolen from Lieberman too.
I’ve already written Joe a song parody, so now it’s time for a limerick:
A Limerick For Traitor Joe
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Joe Lieberman’s meanness runs deep.
He’s a back-stabbing, Dem-screwing creep,
Who’s determined to kill
The health reform bill.
But at least he will never be VEEP.
Tags: Bush v. Gore, Filibuster, Harry Reid, Health Reform, Homeland Security, Joe Lieberman, Public Option, Traitors
Posted in Barack Obama, Filibuster Humor, Harry Reid, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Joe Lieberman, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Washington | 6 Comments »