Headline: “Trump denies Pelosi military aircraft for war zone trip”
Speaker Pelosi’s Limerick Response:
Rumor has it, dear Trump, you were scared
I’d be harmed. “Stop her trip!” you declared.
Using all of your might,
You cancelled my flight.
How sweet! I did NOT know you cared.
Dear Donald, I see that the state
Of our Union is closed, so the date
That you’re set to appear
In my House (nearly here)
Isn’t great. “Speak” in writing … or wait.
Trump’s attempting a blackmail-insurgency:
“I’ve the right to declare an emergency.
But I WON’T do it yet.
Right now it’s a threat!” …
Which proves that there’s really no urgency.
The self-described deal-maker fails
To close deals. Donald’s thwarted? He bails.
Nancy ties him in knots,
And whenever he spots
Her he’ll plotz, as his orange skin pales.
I’ll tell you, to me, the second-most important thing after love what you do is never, ever give up. Don’t give up. Don’t allow it to happen. If there’s a concrete wall in front of you, go through it. Go over it. Go around it. But get to the other side of that wall.
There’s a wall of concrete? Then go through it;
That’s the way that the Donald once drew it.
Are walls MEANT to be crossed?
Or built at great cost:
My conclusion is Donald Trump blew it.
Headline: “Trump storms out of meeting as shutdown careens toward fourth week”
The Donald stormed out of the meeting
Cuz his wall scheme was taking a beating.
The Speaker was “mean,”
So he vented his spleen
In a petulant act of retreating.
Headline: “White House Did Not Understand Shutdown Implications”
The Donald did not comprehend
The great damage a shutdown could send.
This is not a surprise;
Trump’s the inverse of wise,
And his couns’lors kiss Donald’s butt end.
Dear Donald, you’ll need more than luck
With your efforts at passing the buck;
You could crawl on all fours,
But the shutdown blame’s yours:
You’re the schmuck who’s inflicted this muck.
The shutdown, dear Donald, is yours.
You broke it; you keep it. The doors
Of the gov have been shut
By YOU! Get your butt
Down to Congress. Concede … on all fours.
Donald’s wall-pledge is clearly “absurd!”
Don’t take it from me; that’s a word
Mick Mulvaney once used
To describe it. Confused?
So’s the staff-chief now leading Trump’s herd.
The news keeps delivering shocks:
There’s a daily new low for our stocks;
James Mattis resigned;
Trump (as usual) whined;
And we seem to be governed by Fox.
There is plenty more bad news to list,
And the thought of it all makes me pissed.
The government’s closed,
And our nation’s been hosed
By a felon. (Well, you get the gist.)
A promise from Mitch makes me twitch.
Who would bet against glitches or hitch?
Yes a DACA vote pledge
Is worth caca; a hedge
Could turn Schumer from champ to Mitch-bitch.
As Disrupter-in-Chief, Trump’s an ace,
And he certainly seems right on pace
To delib’rately cause
A government pause;
A shut-down to placate his base.
For he promised his fans he’d make waves,
Shake things up and then topple the knaves
Who keep government going
And tax money flowing,
Enforcing each reg that enslaves.
But he finds himself deep in a pickle.
His accomplishments? Not worth a nickel
So he needs a big drama;
A gov-shut-down trauma —
Even gullible fans can be fickle.
Most press coverage about the “cleaning the barn” two-year “budget deal,” negotiated by Boehner as he was handing off his Speaker gig to Paul Ryan, is unduly optimistic. It tends to lull us into thinking that the opportunity for House wingnuts to wreak havoc has been largely eliminated for a substantial period of time.
But that really isn’t true. Why not? Because, generally speaking, there are three broad opportunities for Tea Party types to threaten or cause shutdowns.
1: Budget bills.
2: Debt ceiling crises.
3: Appropriation bills.
And, alas, only the first two items on that list were resolved, leaving ample opportunities for essential appropriation bills to be saddled with unacceptable riders. For instance, riders eliminating Obamacare or defunding Planned Parenthood, to name just two. In other words:
Right-wing Republicans can still pursue their goals through riders on appropriations bills—and, if they don’t get their way, shut down the government.
With Ryan as Speaker, don’t think
That we aren’t stuck right on the brink
Of Tea Party trouble.
It still can cause rubble
Through spending bills yet to gain ink.
The fact that the budget’s resolved
And the ceiling on debt ain’t involved,
Should not make you relieved.
If you are, you’re deceived,
Cuz the poison pill risk isn’t solved.
The House must appropriate cash,
Via bills which the wingnuts can trash
Through riders from guys
With Tea Party ties,
Turning programs we need into ash.
If that happens, then what can be done?
Only vetoes, and those aren’t fun.
But the blackmailing Hill
Can’t prevail on such bill!
Are there any good choices? Nay! None.
Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown sounds sordid,
And I’m hoping it’s somehow aborted.
But the House GOP
Views the dangers with glee;
They assume they’ll again be rewarded.
Exchangeable Views (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican stance is still no:
“Obamacare’s bad and must go.”
So explain why they bitch
That something they’d ditch
Does things they don’t want way too slow.
The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Most experts seem to think the U.S. Supreme Court will strike down DOMA, thereby ending the federal ban on benefits to gay spouses. The question is: Will they do it based upon equal protection, or states’ rights? The former (seemingly supported by the four liberal Supremes) is vastly preferable, but the later appears more likely; the perennial swing judge, Justice Anthony Kennedy, is more of a states’ rights kinda guy.
Limerick Ode To DOMA’s Demise
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m GLAD to hear DOMA’s in trouble.
But will Justices safe in their bubble
Concede that it’s wrong,
Beat the gong, say so long
To treating gay couples like rubble?
Doomed Limerick
Thursday, October 17th, 2013The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
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