Archive for the ‘Firearms & Guns Humor’ Category
Monday, May 1st, 2023
We the Dems must show full solidarity
To counter the loathsome barbarity
Of Republican stances,
Whose fright’ning advances
Account for this lack of hilarity.
Tags: Abortion Rights, Birth Control, Book Banning Limerick, Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election 2024, Election Humor, Election Satire, Feminism, Feminist Limerick, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Presidential Election 2024, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court
Posted in Abortion Rights, Anti-Semitism, Bill Barr, Birther Humor, Campaign 2024, Censorship Satire, Climate Change, Congress Humor, Constitution Humor, Constitutional Crisis, Contraception Humor, Corruption Humor, Crime, Donald Trump, Economy Humor, Election 2024, Energy Humor, Entitlements Humor, Environment Satire, Family Values Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, Fiscal Policy, Florida, Fox News Humor, Free Speech, Gay Rights, Gender Politics, Global Warming, GOP Humor, House Satire, Judiciary Satire, Kevin McCarthy, Legislation Humor, Lindsey Graham, Marco Rubio, Mike Pence, Mike Pompeo, Mitch McConnell, NRA Limerick, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Racism Limerick, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor, Rudy Giuliani, Science Verse, Tax & Budget Humor, Women's Rights | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Solidarity
Wednesday, October 26th, 2022
You think women have too many rights
And that MORE guns will somehow stop fights.
You’ll vote for a liar;
A guy you’d not hire
To baby or dog-sit. That bites!
Tags: Abortion, Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Humor, Election Satire, Feminism, Gun Control, Hypocrisy, Liars, Republicans Humor, Trump, Voting
Posted in Abortion Rights, Corruption Humor, Democracy Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, Gender Politics, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Voting Satire | Comments Off on You KNOW Who You Are!
Wednesday, November 3rd, 2021
Headline: “Supreme Court appears skeptical of New York’s restrictive gun-control law”
New York gun control’s likely to slip,
Cuz the highest Fed Court lacks a grip
On our big city needs
To forestall deadly deeds.
I just hope it won’t shoot from the hip!
Tags: Firearms, Gun Bans, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Gun Limericks, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Law And Order, New York Limerick, NRA, Supreme Court, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Crime, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Law Satire, New York Politics, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court, White House | Comments Off on An Out-Of-Control U.S. Supreme Court? (Limerick)
Thursday, January 28th, 2021
It would be hard to think of a worse candidate for the House Education Committee than Marjorie Taylor Greene. Yet, here we are:
NBC News: “House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif., on Thursday denounced House Republican leaders for appointing Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, R-Ga., to the committee overseeing education after she has questioned the legitimacy of mass shootings and harassed student survivors.”
The Speaker is angry, you’ll glean;
Education Committee for Greene?
Greene’s a pol with no scruples:
Mass shooting of pupils
Was mocked by her – cruelly obscene!
Tags: Committee Assignments, Education Committee, Firearms, Georgia, Gun Violence, House Republicans, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Mass Shootings, Nancy Pelosi, School Shootings, Speaker Pelosi
Posted in Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Nancy Pelosi, Nancy Pelosi Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Students Verse | Comments Off on Demon-Greene (Limerick)
Sunday, May 20th, 2018
Headline: “Texas shooting renews debate about American school design”
The gun-loving NRA faction
Creatively thwarts gun-law action.
Students down on all fours
Dodging death? It blames doors:
Prevent murder by entrance contraction.
Tags: Gun Bans, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Lobby, NRA, School Safety
Posted in Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, NRA Limerick, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Guns Don’t Kill People; Doors Kill People (Limerick)
Monday, April 30th, 2018
USA Today headline: “NRA draws fire from backers, foes for gun ban at event with Vice President Pence”
“Lots of guns make you safer in schools.”
That’s the NRA’s stance — greedy tools!
So they’d arm ev’ry teach,
But when Pence gives a speech
At their meeting — NO GUNS!!! — them’s the rules.
Tags: Gun Bans, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Lobby, Mike Pence, NRA, School Safety
Posted in Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Mike Pence, NRA Limerick, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Gun Ban Hypocrisy (Limerick)
Tuesday, February 27th, 2018
The Donald’s a cowardly fella,
Who has bravery fantasies stella.
He’d save kids, he’ll maintain,
Though (I guess) not from rain:
Watch him hogging his big-ass umbrella.
Tags: Bravery, Crime Humor, Donald Trump, Education Humor, Florida, Florida Massacre, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, NRA, Parkland Florida, School Safety, Schools, Teachers, Trump Bragging, Umbrella
Posted in Crime, Donald Trump, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Trump’s Bravery Claims Are All Wet (Limerick)
Monday, February 26th, 2018
This CNN headline cries out for a limerick: “Trump on Florida shooting: ‘I really believe I’d run in there, even if I didn’t have a weapon'”
Dear Donald: How lovely to know
That you’d bravely and willingly go
T’wards a gunman to save
High school students! You knave,
How’re those bone spurs of yours? What a schmo!
Tags: Bravery, Crime Humor, Donald Trump, Education Humor, Florida, Florida Massacre, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, NRA, Parkland Florida, Police Humor, School Safety, Schools, Teachers, Trump Bragging
Posted in Crime, Donald Trump, Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Our Brave Oval Knave (Limerick)
Wednesday, January 6th, 2016
Ammon Bundy, one of the leaders of the Oregon armed federal-building-takeover, is militantly against the federal government … except when he needs its help:
Ammon Bundy decries and bemoans
Fed’ral rights to the land the gov owns.
Yet he’s pleased to exploit
And extremely adroit
At fed-subsidized small bus’ness loans.
Here’s an excellent Mother Jones article about Ammon Bundy and his SBA loan.
Tags: Ammon Bundy, Anti-Government, Armed Occupation, Cliven Bundy, Domestic Terrorism, Double Standards, Guns, Hypocrisy, Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, Militia Limerick, Money Humor, Oregon Limerick, Protestors Limerick, Ryan Bundy, SBA Loans, Terrorism
Posted in Firearms & Guns Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Money And Finance Humor, Oregon, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, January 5th, 2016
This armed occupation is whack;
The militant Oregon pack
Is called “peaceful” and gets
Kid-glove treatment. All bets
Would be off, were those terrorists black.
Tags: Ammon Bundy, Anti-Government, Armed Occupation, Cliven Bundy, Domestic Terrorism, Double Standards, Guns, Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, Militia Limerick, Oregon Limerick, Protestors Limerick, Ryan Bundy, Terrorism
Posted in Firearms & Guns Humor, Oregon, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Double Standards
Thursday, December 3rd, 2015
Any pol, whether woman or man
Who says shootings are part of God’s plan
Is just shifting the blame,
And for that I say, “Shame!”
“Control gun sales! Your stance doesn’t scan.”
Tags: Assault Weapons, Gun Control, Mass Shooting, Massacres, NRA, Religion In Politics
Posted in Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Yet Another Mass Shooting Limerick
Monday, June 22nd, 2015
I’m NOT Amused, Ted Cruz (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
We can always depend on Ted Cruz
To be tacky in voicing his views;
He tells gun control jokes
After massacres, folks,
Crudely preying on death to “amuse.”
Sen. Ted Cruz apparently finds mass murder amusing. Here’s just one of his campaign jokes uttered just two days after the Charleston church massacre:
“You know the great thing about the state of Iowa is, I’m pretty sure you all define gun control the same way we do in Texas — hitting what you aim at.”
Tags: Campaign Satire, Charleston Church Massacre, Crime & Punishment, Dylann Roof, Election Humor, Gun Control, Hate Crimes, South Carolina, Ted Cruz
Posted in Campaign Humor, Crime, Election Satire, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor, Ted Cruz | Comments Off on I’m NOT Amused, Ted Cruz (Limerick)
Friday, October 3rd, 2014
I’m looking forward to leadership from our Surgeon General, especially now that the Ebola outbreak has reached our nation.
Oh wait … we don’t have one. Why not? Because Vivek Murthy, Obama’s excellent nominee, has the audacity to view guns as a health issue.
What To Do About Ebola? Don’t Ask Our Surgeon General (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though an expert on health would be nice
At this time of Ebola, no dice!
NRA’s GOP
Blocked a great nominee,
And our nation is paying the price.
Tags: Ebola, Epidemics Limerick, Health Limerick, NRA, Obama Verse, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy
Posted in Barack Obama, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, NRA Limerick, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on What To Do About Ebola? Don’t Ask Our Surgeon General (Limerick)
Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
A Not-So-Modest Proposal (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Want to thin out the NRA crowd?
Here’s a concept that’s got me quite wowed:
Pair a gun range and bar,
Cuz those folks won’t get far
When gun-toting drunks are allowed.
(Alas, Combination gun ranges/bars do in fact exist.)
Tags: Alcohol, Assault Weapons, Bars, Firearms, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Range, NRA, Second Amendment
Posted in Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | 3 Comments »
Thursday, March 20th, 2014
Obama’s highly qualified Surgeon General nominee, Vivek Murthy, is in limbo. Why? Because Murthy supports an assault weapons ban and believes guns are a health care issue.
Our Unhealthy Nomination Process (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The move against Murthy ain’t stealth
Cuz gun fans are using their wealth.
Seems his Surgeon Gen. quest
Failed the NRA test:
He thinks guns can be bad for your health.
Tags: Assault Weapons, Firearms, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Health Humor, Law Satire, Legal Verse, NRA, Obama, Second Amendment, Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy
Posted in Barack Obama, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Our Unhealthy Nomination Process (Limerick)
Sunday, July 14th, 2013
Limerick Ode To Zimmerman’s Florida
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If you’d rather shoot people than skeet,
And enjoy killing folks on the street,
But you don’t want to pay
Any price, come what may,
Then Florida’s (f)laws can’t be beat.
*****
Florida-style “Stand Your Ground” laws encourage the aggressive use of firearms based on vague (often bias-inspired) suspicions. And jury verdicts, like George Zimmerman’s acquittal in the Trayvon Martin murder case, only serve to further encourage and rubber stamp murderous behavior.
Tags: Crime & Punishment, Firearms, Florida, George Zimmerman, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Law Satire, Legal Verse, Racism, Second Amendment, Stand Your Ground Law, Trayvon Martin, Trial Humor, Vigilante, Weapon Humor
Posted in Crime, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Legal Limericks, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | 6 Comments »
Monday, July 8th, 2013
The Kansas legislature, in its great wisdom, recently passed a law allowing gun owners to carry weapons in public buildings. And surprise, surprise, insurance companies think this is dangerous.
The EMC Insurance Cos. insures 85 percent to 90 percent of all Kansas school districts and has refused to renew coverage for schools that permit teachers and custodians to carry concealed firearms on their campuses under the new law, which took effect July 1. It’s not a political decision, but a financial one based on the riskier climate it estimates would be created, the insurer said.
Kansas Gun Law Backfires (Multi-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
In municipal spots, like a school,
Concealed weapons in Kansas are cool.
But the pols that decreed this
May soon have to heed this:
They’ve entered a sky-high risk pool.
“You are too great a risk,” said the co
That insured Kansas schools. What a blow!
“We do NOT mean to screw you,
But just can’t renew you.
It’s financial — a matter of dough.”
Forrest Knox, who’s an NRA shill
And the fellow who sponsored the bill
That started this mess,
Says insurers should bless
Teachers toting their weapons at will.
“This will make us all safer,” he swears.
“What do carriers know about scares,
And dangers and risk
And hazards. Tsk-Tsk!
I know better than they!” he declares.
What’s next? It remains to be seen.
At the least, it will take far more green
To insure any school
Where an NRA tool
Hides a gun in her purse or his jean.
Tags: Custodians, Education Humor, EMC Insurance, Forrest Knox, Gun Humor, Insurance Coverage, Insurance Humor, Kansas, Legislation Humor, NRA, Risk Pool, School Safety, Schools, Teachers, Weapon Humor
Posted in Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | 5 Comments »
Monday, April 29th, 2013
Who’s paying Oklahoma Senator James Inhofe to invent and spread lies about Obama stockpiling bullets to deprive 2nd Amendment huggers of ammunition? The gun industry? The bullet industry? Both? Surely he’s not doing it solely because he’s an idiotic conspiracy theorist. Or is he?
Limerick Ode To James Inhofe
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Buy bullets before there’s none left—
All bought up by Barack — you bereft:
That’s conspiracy loon
Jim Inhofe’s new tune;
At making up lies, the guy’s deft.
Tags: Barack Obama, Conspiracy Theories, Constitution Verse, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Jim Inhofe, Oklahoma, Second Amendment
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, James Inhofe Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 6 Comments »
Monday, April 1st, 2013
If you’re a Colorado spouse abuser, take heart: Republicans have vowed to protect your right to bear arms against Dem meanies, who mean to take it away.
Clueless In Colorado (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Good news for domestic abusers,
Bad news for their victim-accusers:
Colorado is where
The Republicans swear
To guard gun rights for battering bruisers.
Tags: Assault Weapons, Battering Spouses, Colorado, Domestic Abuse, Family Values, Firearms, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, National Rifle Association, NRA, Second Amendment, U.S. Constitution
Posted in Constitution Humor, Family Values Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, February 20th, 2013
I won’t be visiting Jay Laze’s pizza place any time soon:
A Virginia Beach pizza shop owner is showing his support for firearm rights by giving gun owners a 15 percent discount.
The discount is given to anyone who brings a gun or concealed handgun permit to All Around Pizzas and Deli.
The Right To Bear Arms … And Eat Cheap Pizza (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This news from Virginia’s alarming,
Although some may consider it charming:
Bring your gun to Jay’s shop.
Watch your pizza price drop.
I do NOT find this fellow disarming.
Tags: All Around Pizzas And Deli, Assault Weapons, Firearms, Food Humor, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, Jay Laze, National Rifle Association, NRA, Pizza Discount, Second Amendment, U.S. Constitution, Virginia, Virginia Beach
Posted in Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Virginia Humor | 6 Comments »
