Archive for the ‘Election Satire’ Category

Dear Barack Obama: Last Night Is What Happens When You Drink Your Own Kool-Aid

Thursday, April 17th, 2008

What did we learn from last night’s debate?  That (unlike Hillary Clinton) Barack Obama falls apart when he finally encounters a hostile press. 

As the Philadelphia Inquirer’s Dick Polman observes, Obama was “shaken, rattled and rolled” at the ABC debate.  So, is this the kind of candidate you want opposing John “Media Pal” McCain in the general election? 

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Dear Barack Obama: Last Night Is What Happens When You Drink Your Own Kool-Aid
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The man with the tongue made of gold
Under pressure last night seemed to fold.
His supporters excuse him—
Claim press guys abuse him.
Words matter. Barack’s? Oversold![tags]ABC Pennsylvania Presidential Debate, Senator Obama, Election Humor, Campaign Satire, Senator Clinton, Hostile Press, Senator McCain[/tags] 

Hey Obama Sycophants, Don’t Say We Didn’t Warn You

Sunday, April 13th, 2008

They were warned, but they refused to listen. And now they’re paying the price.

I’m referring, of course, to the Pro-Obama bloggers who delight in anti-Dem media bias, so long as it’s directed at Hillary Clinton.

But a funny thing happened on the way to the election: Now that the press is giving Obama a hard time over his condescending bitter-small-town-America faux pas, these press bias-enablers are suddenly horrified by media bias. Why? Because it’s their candidate whose ox is being Gored. 

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Hey Obama Sycophants, Don’t Say We Didn’t Warn You!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“The press is unfair to Barack,”
Whines the Cult of Obama with shock.
Loaded questions, contortions
Of words, and distortions
Now wrong, cuz it’s their guy they mock.[tags]Media Bias, Press Bias, Media Humor, Senator Obama, Senator Clinton, Presidential Election Campaign Satire[/tags]

McCain’s New Campaign Slogan

Saturday, April 12th, 2008

John McCain has been having a tough time raising campaign money lately.  So I thought I’d help out with a McCain campaign slogan haiku — gratis. Aren’t I generous?

Remember Bush’s
Humble foreign policy?
Vote McCain for more. [tags]Senator McCain, Presidential Campaign Verse[/tags]

Biased Journalists And Bloggers, Heal Thyselves!

Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

Hey, cable honchos. Before lambasting Hillary for “failing to fact check,” you might consider dabbling in some fact checking yourselves.

I’m referring, of course, to the media’s dead hospital patient mock-fest and, more broadly, to the “Gore-ing” of Hillary Clinton.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Biased Journalists And Bloggers, Heal Thyselves
By Madeleine Begun Kane

In cov’rage quite sloppy at best,
The press attacked Hill’ry with zest,
Disputing her facts.
But ’twas they who were lax.
Cuz if Clinton says east they say west.[tags]Biased Bloggers, Sloppy Journalists, Senator Clinton, Press Fact Checking, Presidential Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Health Humor, Media Limerick[/tags]

Ode To Randi “Queen of Obscene” Rhodes

Friday, April 4th, 2008

As you surely know by now, Air America host Randi Rhodes has been suspended for calling both Geraldine Ferraro and Hillary Clinton “whores” and describing Hillary with more f-words than I could manage to count in this clip of her performance.  Just one question: This was supposed to be comedy?

Ode To Randi “Queen of Obscene” Rhodes
By Madeleine Begun Kane

That performance by Randi ain’t pretty.
Calling Hill’ry a whore’s hardly witty.
Hurling f-bombs galore
About Hill.  What a bore!
She’s suspended? This blog has no pity.[tags]Randi Rhodes, Air America Radio, Randi’s F-words, Senator Clinton, Geraldine Ferraro, Rhodes Suspension, Tasteless Humor, Media Humor, Presidential Campaign Verse[/tags]

An Ode To Lefty Bloggers Who Hate Hillary Clinton (Updated)

Sunday, March 30th, 2008

An Ode To Lefty Bloggers Who Hate Hillary (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama supporters proclaim
That Clinton must quit, hurling blame,
Shrieking “Stop this damn fray!”
Dems love fighters, they say.
But not if the fighter’s a dame.

UPDATE: After posting this, I went searching for some bloggers who are rational on the subject of Clinton and Obama. Here’s what I found:

Take Your Boobs And Go Home Watch
Heh
Krugman Reads His Hillary
Obama Likes GOP Foreign Policy
Obama To Blame If The Dem Contest Goes To The Convention
Dear Democratic Elite: Back Off
It’s going past Denver
The World Is Watching[tags]Lefty Blogs Humor, Presidential Election Humor, Campaign Satire, Senator Clinton, Senator Obama, Democrats Limerick, Gender Humor, White House Verse[/tags]

Ode To John “Maverick” McCain

Thursday, March 27th, 2008

Apparently, maverick is a synonym for felon.  Who knew?

Ode To John “Maverick” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A law breaker — that’s John McCain,
Treating FEC regs with disdain.
Having championed those rules,
He plays us for fools.
Yet we still hear the mav’rick refrain.[tags]Senator John McCain Humor, McCain Maverick Satire, Election Humor, Campaign Satire, FEC Humor, White House Humor, Media Humor[/tags]

Presidential Election Blues

Monday, March 24th, 2008

Presidential Election Blues
By Madeleine Begun Kane

While pundits bloviate,
Candidates exaggerate,
Flirt with fourth estate
And would-be running mate.

They travel multi-state,
Wooing pools of voter-bait.
Think the Oval’s their fate.
Hardly ever talk straight.

Their resumes inflate.
They claim opponents don’t rate.
Prez debates?  Not great.
November 5th —  can’t wait![tags]Campaign Satire, Presidential Election Humor, White House Poetry[/tags]

Ode To “Foreign Policy Maven” McCain

Wednesday, March 19th, 2008

The left blogosphere has been packed with stories about John “Foreign Policy Maven”  McCain’s serial gaffes, in which he confused Islam’s Sunni and Shiite sects while trying to prove Iran supports al-Qaeda in Iraq. His gaffes were so bad, even über-loyalist Joe Lieberman was forced to correct him.

So, can we expect major media columnists and talking heads to question McCain’s foreign policy prowess?  A small handful of fair-minded, insightful columnists like the Philadelphia Inquirer’s Dick Polman can be counted on at moments like this.   But in the main, I wouldn’t hold your breath.

And that brings me to my latest limerick: 

Ode To “Foreign Policy Maven” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane

John McCain’s expertise ain’t legit:
Sunni? Shiite? He doesn’t know shit.
So the man should be toast.
But the press let’s him coast
Cuz he’s great in a barbecue pit.

(For more humor on this topic, check out Joe Lieberman Has To Remind McCain He’s Not In Vietnam, by Don Davis.)[tags]Senator John McCain, Foreign Policy Expertise, Sunni, Shiite, Islam, McCain Barbecue, McCain Gaffes, al-Qaeda, Iran, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Media Humor[/tags]

Hillary Clinton Derangement Syndrome (Haiku)

Sunday, March 16th, 2008

Smearing Hillary,
Ignoring Barack’s foibles.
Must edit blogroll.

(For more on HCDS (Hillary Clinton Derangement Syndrome) read Left Coaster;  Hillary Clinton’s Internet Director Challenges Bloggers To Cover Obama Campaign Tactics;  Sherry Chandler;  Pro-Hillary Writers On Strike At Daily Kos;  Avedon Carol;  Obama News Anchor;  Carpetbagger Report;  Pen-Elayne;  Chalice Chick; and  Gene Lyons)[tags]Election Humor, Campaign Satire, Hillary Haiku, Obama Haiku, Clinton Derangement Syndrome[/tags]

Obama Tries To Paint Over Politics As Usual

Saturday, March 8th, 2008

Barack Obama claims to be battling Hillary Clinton under a new set of political rules. But as Big Tent illustrates, his personal attacks on Clinton sound suspiciously like politics as usual.  And that brings me to my latest haiku:

The new politics,
Courtesy of Obama:
Old rules with feint-job.
[tags]Senator Obama, Senator Clinton, Campaign Satire, Presidential Election Humor, Obama Haiku, Obama Hypocrisy, Political Rules, Personal Attacks[/tags]

Election ’08 Haiku

Sunday, March 2nd, 2008

U.S. middle class
Nickel-and-dimed by George Bush.
Change way overdue.

(Inspired by this change prompt.  And speaking of prompts, there’s still  time to participate in my limerick and haiku prompt. Its theme is walking.)

UPDATE: I just remembered another haiku I wrote about change several months ago:

“People want change,”
Claim presidential candidates.
I’d prefer twenties.[tags]Middle Class Humor, Bush Presidency, Presidential Election, George Bush Haiku, Bush Economy[/tags]

Dear Ralph: Go Away!

Monday, February 25th, 2008

I used to think Ralph Nader keeps running for president because he’s an egomaniac and a blowhard.  But I’m starting to suspect that he suffers from Dubya-disease — he needs to feel relevant. 

And now it’s time for a limerick:

Dear Ralph: Go Away!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ralph Nader has surfaced again
To proclaim he’s a prince among men
And our nation’s salvation.
Give up your fixation,
Ralph. Find a new hobby. Try zen.

For more Ralph Nader humor, check out Ralph Nader, ‘Unsafe At Any Age,’ by Don Davis and Nader Announces Plan To Wreck Election, But Prominent Crackpots Are Cool To Bid, by Andy Borowitz. And for a serious take on the topic, there’s Ralph Nader, Tragedy And Farce, by Dick Polman.

Obama’s Words – A Textbook Case Of Subtle Sexism

Sunday, February 17th, 2008

Some recent Barack Obama comments reminded me of a personal essay on subtle sexism I wrote way back in 1990.  And while that might sound like ancient history, my essay, published under various titles including Gender At Work and My Most Attractive Adversary, is the lead Gender Gap chapter essay in a pair of current (2008) textbooks by Gary Goshgarian:  The Contemporary Reader and Readings For Today.

In his introduction to my essay, Northeastern University English Professor Goshgarian observes:

Women may seem to have made tremendous progress professionally and academically, but they are held back by indirect sexist comments and attitudes. They are caught in a catch-22.  If they react against these seemingly small slights, they appear to be overreacting or too sensitive. But to let them pass may signal that such comments are somehow acceptable.  In the next essay, humorist and self-described “recovering lawyer” Madeleine Begun Kane holds that subtle sexism maintains gender differences.

And that brings me to this subtly sexist Obama comment, made in response to Hillary Clinton attacks:

You challenge the status quo and suddenly the claws come out.

And to this even more offensive line:

I understand that Senator Clinton, periodically when she’s feeling down, launches attacks as a way of trying to boost her appeal.

“Claws come out?” “Periodically?”  “Feeling down?” These words are more subtle than the B-word, I suppose. But they are sexist, nonetheless. 

So where’s the blogger outrage over Obama’s sexism?  Lots of luck finding it among the A-list bloggers — the male ones, at least. They have a much better time of it interpreting everything the Clinton team does as racist. 

Sure, there’s some great commentary about Obama’s sexism over at Taylor Marsh’s blog and at Talk Left. But in the main, Obama’s getting a gender bias-pass.

Meanwhile, many educated young women, who apparently take the accomplishments of feminism for granted, are supporting Obama’s candidacy over Hillary Clinton.

You know what those young women could use?  A good gender studies course.  Because sexism, after all, isn’t ancient history.

(For the lighter side of gender issues, you can find my feminist humor here.)

Hey Pundits, Stifle Yourselves! (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 16th, 2008

I can’t decide what’s more annoying — when pundits are wrong, or when they insist on finding meaning in the meaningless, deep significance in utter nonsense. Digby provides a fine example of the latter:

Matthews, Olbermann, Norah O’Donnell and David Gregory are sitting around interpreting the Michigan Democratic vote and examining the exit polls to determine meaningful trends about the upcoming primaries.

Michigan means nothing, good or bad, for Democrats. … [CLINTON] WAS THE ONLY ONE OF THE TOP THREE ON THE FRIGGING BALLOT! …

… The primary doesn’t count. …

But they’re out there spewing crap anyway, trying to impact the race, making predictions, being fortune tellers as usual …

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Hey Pundits, Stifle Yourselves!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The pundits opine and expound:
On sheer nonsense they chew and they pound,
Finding meaning in stuff
That means nothing. Enough!
Watch them frown as they wax so profound. [tags]Pundit Humor, Election, Humor, Media Limerick, Campaign Satire, Vacuous Punditry, Michigan Primary, Democratic Primary, Presidential Campaign Poem[/tags]

Is Black The New Teflon?

Sunday, January 13th, 2008

The impression I’ve been getting lately is that every barb and criticism aimed at Obama is almost bound to be characterized as racist by Obama surrogates.

Isn’t there something wrong when a candidate (or commentator) has to fear the racism card each time he/she says something negative about a black candidate? Something that would be just fine to say about a white one?

And shouldn’t Obama be required to meet criticisms on the merits? Everyone else is … or certainly should be. Not only does this better serve the voters, but it also helps candidates prepare for the general election.

By cloaking himself in a coat of black Teflon, Obama belittles genuine racial grievances and stifles real debate. He even demeans himself.

And now, a limerick:

Is Black The New Teflon?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s campaign has an ace:
It’s a joker, that card they call race.  
Every Hill-team critique
Draws their racism-pique.
Can’t attack him: He’s black! That’s their case.[tags]Obama Commentary, Race Card, Election Racism, Racist Accusations, Campaign Satire[/tags]

Hillary Haiku

Wednesday, January 9th, 2008

“Hillary cried,”
The media lied.
Who’s crying now?[tags]Hillary Clinton Verse, Hillary Poetry, Media Humor, Campaign Satire, Election Humor[/tags]

Dear Editor: Enough With The Polls, Already!

Tuesday, January 1st, 2008

Dear Editor: Enough With the Polls, Already!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My int’rest in polling is waning:
Who’s winning, who’s losing, who’s gaining.
Tell me where these guys stand—
Who’s a liar? What’s canned?
Give me substance — not horse race-campaigning.

Update: Don Davis has a fun take on the same topic. And the witty and oh so modest Jon Swift has posted the best blog posts of 2007 as chosen by the bloggers themselves. [tags]Presidential Campaigns, Election Humor, Polls Humor, Horse Race Politics, Media Humor[/tags]

A Liar’s Haiku

Sunday, December 30th, 2007

AP calls Mitt’s lies
A “candor gap,” bypassing
Candor lacuna. [tags]Mitt Romney Satire, Candor Gap, Media Dishonesty[/tags]

Ode To John “You Little Jerk” McCain

Tuesday, December 18th, 2007

Calling audience questioners “jerks,” is far from John McCain’s worse flaw.  But now that he’s done it at least twice, I thought I’d write the testy, warmongering Senator a limerick:

Ode To John “You Little Jerk” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Among John McCain’s irksome quirks
Is his habit of calling guys jerks
For presenting a query
Of which John is leery—
Still less galling than George Dubya’s smirks.[tags]Senator John McCain, Presidential Race Humor, Little Jerk, Campaign Satire, Election Humor[/tags]