Archive for the ‘Election Satire’ Category
Wednesday, January 25th, 2012
According to Newt Gingrich, his serial wife-cheating makes him “normal,” better able to relate to the problems of average people, and more electable. You’ve got to give that fellow Brownie-points for creativity. Who else could turn multiple affairs into a plus?
In an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network this afternoon, Newt Gingrich picked up Rick Perry’s torch in the so-called “war on religion,” promising that he would fight back against judges who are “trying to drive God out of life.” The thrice-married Speaker then defended his personal marital history, claiming his multiple affairs “make me more normal than somebody who wanders around seeming perfect” because he can understand “the human condition and challenges of life for normal people.”
Limerick Ode To “Normal” Newt Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My affairs make me “normal,” says Newt.
As defenses go, Newt’s is a beaut:
Seems perfection is bad,
And unless you’re a cad,
Your empathy skills are minute.
Tags: Affairs, Campaign Satire, CBN, Christian Broadcasting Network, Electability, Election Humor, Empathy, God, Infidelity, Newt Gingrich, Religion Humor, Speaker
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Excuses Satire, Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To “Normal” Newt Gingrich
Tuesday, January 24th, 2012
Newt Gingrich seemed way off his game at last night’s Florida debate. And at first, I attributed this to Mitt Romney’s new, improved debating style.
But Newt apparently needs the adrenalin rush that comes with cheers and applause. And last night’s NBC debate rules precluded such a rush: Audience feedback was limited, in the interest of using the time for actual debating.
So now Newt (always on the outlook for another excuse to bash the media) is petulantly threatening to boycott any debate that limits the audience’s free speech:
Mr. Gingrich’s performance in the debate in Tampa on Monday night was far more muted. Critics noted that he seemed to be off his game. The National Journal, which co-hosted the NBC debate, compared Gingrich to “a stand-up comedian whose routine suffers without echoes of laughter egging him on.”
Mr. Gingrich clearly noticed something was off, too. “We’re going to serve notice on future debates,” he told Fox. “We’re just not going to allow that to happen. That’s wrong. The media doesn’t control free speech. People ought to be allowed to applaud if they want to.”
Hmmm…., I wonder how Newt feels about boos.
Limerick Ode To Newt’s Latest Temper Tantrum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
No cheering at last night’s debate!
This has Gingrich quite peeved and irate.
He says cheers from the crowd
Simply must be allowed.
Without cheers, will Newt Gingrich deflate?
Tags: Campaign Humor, Debate Limerick, Election Humor, First Amendment, Florida, Free Speech, Media Bashing, Media Humor, Mitt Romney, NBC, Newt Gingrich
Posted in Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 9 Comments »
Monday, January 23rd, 2012
Newt Gingrich demolished Mitt in South Carolina. Newt’s surging in Florida. And Romney’s large national lead is collapsing. Needless to say, the Republican establishment is starting to panic:
To the extent Newt threatens the Establishment, it’s because of his electability–or lack thereof. The GOP’s mandarins see Gingrich’s nomination as a sure way to blow their chance of deposing Barack Obama. They see Gingrich as the political equivalent of a Fukushima nuclear plant worker, with polls showing him to be lethally irradiated by his negative approval ratings. Whereas Mitt Romney is running about even with Barack Obama in head-to-head polling, Newt loses by double-digit margins. Sure, those numbers could change if Gingrich beats Romney and wins the nomination, with all the accolades it entails. On the other hand, his grandiosity syndrome may kick in, as it has before, and render him a laughing stock. Hence the many Establishment Republicans now saying things like, “Newt means losing 45 states.”
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Limerick Ode To Republican Panic
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican powers-that-be
Are scared of a Newt-nominee:
Newt’s grandiose ways
Could trigger malaise,
As voters to Democrats flee.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Florida, GOP, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Polls, Republicans Humor, RNC, South Carolina, Voting Limerick
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Polls, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor, Voting Satire | 6 Comments »
Friday, January 20th, 2012
The South Carolina primary is tomorrow, and Newt Gingrich’s poll numbers are picking up steam.
Mitt Romney’s South Carolina Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It appears that Newt Gingrich may win
Tomorrow, to Romney’s chagrin.
Just imagine the gloating
Right after the voting!
If this happens, will Mitt take to gin?
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Polls, Presidential Campaign Humor, Republican Primary, South Carolina
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 8 Comments »
Thursday, January 19th, 2012
In case you’re asking
why Rick Perry has dropped out:
Donors talked Turkey.
*****
My head is spinning
from Republican debates.
I’m begging — please stop!
*****
View pols with caution.
Review records and viewpoints.
Behold all the lies.
*****
Brilliance from pols?
No reason to expect it.
Saneness would be nice.
*****
Tags: Campaign Funds, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Fund Raising, Political Haiku & Senryu, Politicians, Republican Debates, Rick Perry, Turkey
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, January 18th, 2012
You’ve probably heard that Rick Perry’s idiotic debate remarks, claiming Turkey is run by Islamic terrorists, led to a diplomatic incident. But did you know it inspired George W. Bush to send Rick Perry this limerick?
Limerick Letter From George W. Bush To Rick Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Rick, I’ve been meaning to write,
Cuz I watch you debate with delight.
And your Turkey faux pas:
What a laugh — Ha! Ha! Ha!
Thanks for making me look really bright!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Diplomatic Incidents, Election Humor, Foreign Relations, George W. Bush, Presidential Debate, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, State Department, Turkey
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry | Comments Off on Limerick Letter From George W. Bush To Rick Perry
Friday, January 13th, 2012
Mitt Romney is fluent in French. Finally, something to like about him!
But not so fast! According to a Newt Gingrich ad, French fluency’s a non-non:
Limerick Ode To Newt “J’accuse” Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s a message from Newt’s latest ad:
Mitt Romney speaks French and that’s bad.
What an odd thing to knock:
Mitt sounds like a Jacques,
And bilingual is suspect. How sad!
Oddly enough, there’s ample evidence that Newt Gingrich pouvait comprendre cette phrase.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Foreign Languages, French Fluency, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Ads
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Language Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Newt “J’accuse” Gingrich
Wednesday, January 11th, 2012
According to Mitt Romney, people who challenge Wall Street and economic unfairness are driven by “envy.”
Limerick Ode To Mitt “They’re All Just Jealous” Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Distribution of wealth on your mind?
Take exception to it and you’ll find
That according to Mitt
You’re an envious twit.
To inequities, Romney is blind.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Class Envy, Class Warfare, Distribution Of Wealth, Election Humor, Envy Humor, Financial Inequity, Income Tax, Jealousy Humor, Mitt Romney, Wall Street
Posted in Campaign Humor, Economy Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, January 10th, 2012
By now you’ve surely seen Mitt Romney’s “I like being able to fire people” video clip.
Ode To Mitt “I like being able to fire people” Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“I like … to fire people,”
Said Mitt Romney, with a smile.
This quote, while out-of-context,
Will be sure to irk and rile.
And well it should: The pleasure
Mitt conveys with eyes aglow
Reveals that Mitt seems happy
Telling people, “Time to go.”
No doubt he’ll claim unfairness:
He meant those who’d earned his boot,
And ads that use this sound bite
Are misleading. What a hoot!
Mitt Romney’s out-of-context ads
Are packed with sneaky bile,
Defaming his opponents,
And misleading by a mile.
It’s Mitt who set the standard:
Once a word’s been said, it’s game.
So if context doesn’t matter,
Here’s to treating Mitt the same.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Dishonesty Humor, Election Humor, Employment, Employment Humor, Mitt Romney, Political Ads, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Speeches Satire | 2 Comments »
Saturday, January 7th, 2012
During a Laconia, New Hampshire campaign stop, Newt had the audacity to say “I’m not rich.” And his wife Callista helpfully added, “We have one home.” Apparently Newt and I don’t share the same definition of rich:
This past summer, Gingrich had to file the financial-disclosure form required of presidential candidates. It revealed that he has a net worth of at least $6.7 million and that his income was at least $2.6 million in 2010. That’s about 65 times the income of the average family of four in the United States.
Limerick Ode To Newt “I’m Not Rich” Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Newt Gingrich would like to be king
And is part of the wealthy right-wing.
He denies that he’s rich.
Just “one home” — what a bitch!
He should shorten his surname to “Ging.”
Tags: Callista Gingrich, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Financial Disclosure, New Hampshire, Newt Gingrich, Wealth Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Newt “I’m Not Rich” Gingrich
Saturday, January 7th, 2012
If you’re middle class or poor, and think you’ll fare better under Romney, this independent analysis of Mitt Romney’s proposed tax plan from the nonpartisan Tax Policy Center should surely change your mind.
But if you don’t have time to read the story, this limerick should give you the gist:
Limerick Ode To Romney’s “Robin Hood In Reverse” Tax Plan
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Want the rich to get richer? Vote Mitt.
Want a deficit increase? Mitt’s it.
Want things to get worse
For the middle class purse?
Then vote Romney — his tax plan is shit.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Deficit, Election Humor, Fiscal Humor, Middle Class, Mitt Romney, Tax Policy Center, Taxes, Wealth Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 3 Comments »
Friday, January 6th, 2012
Rick Santorum must think we’re stupid. He’s claiming that his racist reference to “black people” and welfare was really a reference to “blah people.”
Limerick Ode To Rick “Blah” Santorum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If you’re black, Rick Santorum’s a fan.
That’s true, be you woman or man.
But to folks who are “blah”
Rick Santorum says “Nah!”
It’s the “blah” people Ricky will pan.
Tags: Black People, Blah People, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, John King, Racism, Rick Santorum, Welfare
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | 5 Comments »
Thursday, January 5th, 2012
In case you were wondering, Rick Santorum still thinks states have the right to outlaw contraception. Why? Because it’s “a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”
Limerick Ode To Sex-Obsessed Santorum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Contraception’s immoral, says Rick,
Cuz it licenses sex with a chick
To whom you ain’t wed.
So ban it instead!
Vote Santorum: Stop sex that is sick.
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Campaign Satire, Constitution Verse, Contraception Humor, Election Humor, Rick Santorum, States Rights
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Sex-Obsessed Santorum
Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012
I think Democrats should adopt Barney Frank’s slogan suggestion, which I paraphrase in this limerick:
Limerick Ode To Barney Frank
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I will surely miss Barney Frank’s guts
And his humor, no ifs, ands, or buts.
Take his slogan suggestion.
It’s witty — no question:
“We’re not perfect, but [those guys] are nuts.”
Tags: Barney Frank, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Lawrence O'Donnell, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Republicans Humor | 3 Comments »
Monday, January 2nd, 2012
A Cautionary Election Year Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
At long last, a new year is upon us,
And the fate of our land hinges on us.
Pay attention to news
And beware of skewed views.
Time to stop letting evil pols con us.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, GOP Lies, Politicians Limerick, Pols, Voter Apathy, Voting Limerick
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Voting Satire | Comments Off on A Cautionary Election Year Limerick
Tuesday, December 27th, 2011
The headline of this story says it all: “Newly recovered court files cast doubt on Gingrich version of first divorce.”
Newt Still Lying After All These Years (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Newt, on your web site you claim
That divorce was your wife Jackie’s aim.
But the County Clerk files
Show you’re lying by miles.
You brought suit. She objected to same.
Tags: Divorce, GOP Lies, Jackie Gingrich, Newt Gingrich
Posted in Election Satire, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 4 Comments »
Monday, December 19th, 2011
Rick Perry’s latest “oops” moment reminds me of this old SNL parody debate line: “It was my understanding that there would be no math.”
I’m referring to Perry’s “impressive” U.S. budget cut pledge:
Rick Perry made another slip on Saturday when he pledged to cut a whopping $5 trillion from President Barack Obama’s proposed budget – a number which is $1.3 million higher than Obama’s total budget, CBS News reported.
Limerick Ode To Math-Challenged Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Perry’s “oops” lines continue to mount.
Of wisdom the guy ain’t a fount:
Touts a huge budget cut
Which exceeds the whole nut.
Guess we don’t need a prez who can count.
Tags: Budget Limerick, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Saturday Night Live, SNL
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Math-Challenged Perry
Wednesday, December 14th, 2011
Mitt Romney told the New York Times that Newt Gingrich is too “zany” to be U.S. president.
Mitt Critiques Newt (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Newt Gingrich is “zany,” says Mitt,
Which makes him for prez quite unfit.
I’m no Mitt devotee,
But I can’t help agree.
“Zany’s” best saved for toons or a skit.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Mitt Romney, New York Times, Newt Gingrich
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, December 13th, 2011
Confessed serial adulterer Newt Gingrich has taken the Family Leader no-adultery pledge, which includes this statement: “I also pledge to uphold the institution of marriage through personal fidelity to my spouse and respect for the marital bonds of others.”
Apparently, the following limerick was stricken from an earlier draft:
Newt’s Pledge (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
No adult’ry for me, pledges Newt.
I’ve given my cheating the boot.
I’ve confessed and repented.
My soul’s reinvented.
And I can’t get it up, so it’s moot.
Tags: Adultery Humor, Campaign Satire, Defense Of Marriage Act, Election Humor, Family Leader Pledge, Marriage Satire, Newt Gingrich, Religion Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor | 12 Comments »
Sunday, December 11th, 2011
In the wake of Mitt Romney’s misplaced $10,000 bet, the “Intrade political futures market shows Mitt Romney’s chances of winning the GOP presidential nomination dropping to 40% today, while Newt Gingrich’s chances have surged to 37%.”
Mitt’s Losing Bet (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mitt’s ten-thousand dollar faux pas
Makes Republican voters say, “Bah!”
So betting is strong
That Romney’s gone wrong,
And that Newt will get voters’ “Hurrah!”
Tags: $10000 Bet, Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Election Humor, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Presidential Debate, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Mitt’s Losing Bet (Limerick)
