Archive for the ‘Economy Humor’ Category
Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010
It’s getting hard to keep track of all the Republican “trash and cash” Recovery Act hypocrisy. But Steve Benen has a stimulus hypocrisy update, and I have a limerick:
Ode To GOP Stimulus Hypocrisy
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“The stim bill was bad. Voted no,
Cuz it won’t the economy grow.”
That’s the GOP rant
As they privately chant,
“Now give me more stimulus dough.”
Tags: Economy Satire, GOP Humor, Recovery Act, Republican Hypocrisy, Stimulus Bill, Trash and Cash
Posted in Congress Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, January 26th, 2010
Responding to his political crisis, President Obama is doing precisely the wrong thing. As Paul Krugman said,
A spending freeze? That’s the brilliant response of the Obama team to their first serious political setback?
It’s appalling on every level.
Something tells me that Obama’s State of the Union address is going to be jam-packed with pandering double talk.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Ode To Barack Hussein Hoover
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Prez Obama, once shaker and mover,
Is reduced to a pand’ring maneuver.
Dealt a setback, his plan
Is a spending freeze? Man!
We’ve elected a latter-day Hoover.
********
Congratulations to my good friend Don Davis of Satirical Political for taking top prize in this year’s HumorFeed contest and being named The Best Satire of the Year. Don won for his hilarious A Real War On Christmas: Outrage Grows Over Excessive Bonuses To Santa’s Elves. Congrats, again Don. Well deserved!
(Full disclosure: I was a member of the four judge panel. However, the contest submissions were anonymous, so there was no need to disqualify myself.)
Tags: Economy Satire, Herbert Hoover, Obama poem, Pandering, Paul Krugman, Political Setbacks, Recession, SOTU, Spending Freeze
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, White House | 5 Comments »
Thursday, June 4th, 2009
Republicans have no shortage of things to fulminate about. One of their favorites? The General Motors bankruptcy:
Bankrupt Values (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
An auto co known as GM
In the past was considered a gem.
It’s in bankruptcy now.
Will that hurt? Yes, and how!
But the GOP’s goal? Blame the Dem!
(You can find my lighter car humor columns and limericks here.)
Tags: Automobiles, Bankruptcy, Blame, Cars, Democrats, Economy, Finance, General Motors, GM, GOP, Law Satire, Money, Obama, Republicans Humor, Values
Posted in Automobiles Satire, Barack Obama, Blame Game, Business Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Bankrupt Values
Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
It sounds like Texas Congressman Pete Sessions could use some … uh … sessions on somebody’s couch.
… Representative Pete Sessions of Texas, may indeed face an uphill fight with his argument that Mr. Obama is not trying to create jobs. In an interview, Mr. Sessions cited rising unemployment in asserting that the administration intended to “diminish employment and diminish stock prices” as part of a “divide and conquer” strategy to consolidate power.
Ode To The Wingnutty Pete Sessions
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Texas Republican Sessions
Likes to conjure up lib’ral transgressions:
Claims Barack to build power
Made stocks and jobs sour.
Pete needs help from the head-shrink professions.
Tags: Employment, Obama, Pete Sessions, Republicans Humor, Stocks, Texas
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Pete Sessions, Political Limericks, Republicans Humor, Texas Humor, Wingnuts | 5 Comments »
Sunday, March 29th, 2009
I, for one, thoroughly enjoyed the House Republicans’ number-free budget. And I’m looking forward to the expanded version they’ve promised for next week — the one that won’t have any letters in it either.
Republican Road To Remedial Math (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The purported Republican budget
Has no numbers, so how can we judge it?
There’s no dollars or sense
In this PR offense.
It appears they decided to fudge it.
Tags: Budget, GOP, PR, Remedial Math, Republicans Humor
Posted in Congress Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 1 Comment »
Thursday, March 19th, 2009
I practiced law for over a dozen years and negotiated lots of contracts. And, unlike the Bush administration, I always kept my poker face. Why? Because if you want the best possible deal, you must make the other party think that he needs you more than you need him.
So, for example, when you tell banks that they’re too big to fail, you disincentivize them from cooperating, or even telling you the truth. That’s why I’m not surprised that 13 of the “top 23 private recipients of taxpayer-funded bailouts under the $700 billion program” enacted by the Bush administration “owed more than $220 million in unpaid federal taxes” and that they lied about it on their TARP contracts.
Why bother being honest? After all, it’s not as if Bush’s Treasury Department made them back up their statements with actual tax records. Of course not — they were too big to fail.
This brings me to my latest limerick:
Tough Negotiators, Those Bushies!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear bank, we can not let you fail.
You’re too big. Pay no mind if we wail
That you owe us back tax.
Do not worry. Relax!
Cuz that huge bailout check’s in the mail.
Tags: Bailout Humor, Banks, Bush, Contracts, Law Satire, Legal Humor, Lies, Negotiating, Paulson, TARP, Taxes, Taxpayers, Treasury
Posted in Banking Humor, Ben Bernanke, Business Humor, Corruption Humor, Crime, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, George Bush Satire, Henry Paulson, Law Satire, Paulson Plan, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, TARP Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, Tim Geithner | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, March 17th, 2009
The AIG bonus fiasco has been very enlightening. Giving incompetent employees huge bonuses, so they won’t resign? And with taxpayer cash yet? What a concept!
I think all of us who still have jobs should send our bosses a letter like this:
Dear Boss, Where’s My Bonus? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear boss, where’s my bonus and raise?
I expect lots of cash — no delays.
Though my work surely sucks,
I deserve all those bucks.
Ain’t it great that incompetence pays?
Tags: AIG, Bailout, Bonuses, Economy, Employment, Incompetence, Money, Workplace
Posted in Banking Humor, Business Humor, Corruption Humor, Economy Humor, Federal Reserve, Fiscal Policy, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Social Satire, Tax & Budget Humor | 7 Comments »
Monday, March 16th, 2009
The Bush-Cheney spinmeisters refuse to go away. Last week it was Ari Fleischer, and this week it’s Dana Perino on CSPAN’s Washington Journal.
Perino actually said Bush should get some credit for last week’s stock market upswing. And she falsely claimed for the gazillionth time that Bush inherited a recession from Bill Clinton.
U.S. economy as of January 20, 2001. U.S. economy as of January 20, 2009. Exactly the same, right?
Sigh… It’s time for a limerick:
Go Away Already, Bushie Spinmeisters!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Blame Barack when the stock market drops.
When it rises say Bush deserves props.
That’s Perino’s approach.
(Bush deserves no reproach.)
Yes, at double talk Dana is tops.
Tags: Ari Fleischer, Bill Clinton, Bush, CSPAN, Dana Perino, Economy, Inauguration, Media, Obama, Recession, Spinmeister, Stock Market, Washington Journal
Posted in Barack Obama, Dana Perino, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Spin Humor, Stock Market Humor, Washington, White House | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, March 11th, 2009
Republicans love to attack Obama’s initiatives by claiming they’re distractions from his “fix the economy” job. Apparently, if the economy continues to tank, it’s because he wasted all that time signing an executive order opening up stem cell research.
Can’t Win An Argument On The Merits? Just Use The “Distraction” Gambit.
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Obama’s distracted. His plate
Is too full,” his detractors berate.
“His attention’s dispersed.
Put economy first.”
The problem is nothing can wait.
But Republicans don’t like his plans
And they often use indirect pans.
So research and health
Don’t relate to our wealth?
Boosting science and health — they ain’t fans.
Tags: Distraction, Economy, Full Plate, GOP, Health Care, Obama, Republicans Humor, Science Humor, Science Research, Stem Cells
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Verse | Comments Off on Can’t Win An Argument On The Merits? Just Use The “Distraction” Gambit.
Monday, March 9th, 2009
Finally, An Up Side To Filing Tax Returns (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When paying my taxes great pains
Always shoot through my muscles and veins.
But for once there’s relief
From an oft taxing beef:
Schedule D won’t show capital gains.
Tags: Capital Gains, Finances, Income Tax, Money Humor, Tax Limerick
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Stock Market Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
Saturday, February 28th, 2009
“The great irony of where we are today is that we had a Bush-Obama big-spending program that was bipartisan in its nature. We got big spending under Bush, now we’ve got big spending under Obama.” (Newt Gingrich as quoted by the New York Times)
Funny, but I could have sworn that Dick Cheney was Bush’s Veep.
Tags: Budget, Bush, Cheney, CPAC, Economy, Gingrich, GOP, Hypocrisy, Obama, Republicans Humor
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Commentary, Quote Of The Day, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Quote of the Day
Thursday, February 26th, 2009
Rep. Jeb Hensarling (R-TX) spouted these enlightening remarks on C-SPAN today:
I don’t think we can figure out how to outlaw recessions any more than we can outlaw tornadoes or outlaw hurricanes. … Economic growth has never gone in one straight line up. It goes in a zigzag line. It’s a part of freedom. Sometimes freedom can be messy. Sometimes freedom has reversals. But it certainly beats the alternative.
Just three questions for Rep. Hensarling:
1. Are non-democracies recession-proof?
2. Are you trying to make Governor Jindal look insightful?
3. If we fight to end the recession, do the terrorists win?
Oh, and please tell me who exactly is trying to outlaw recessions. Because that phantom person may just be the only living being who out-idiots Rep. Hensarling.
Tags: Don Rumsfeld, Economy, Freedom, Jeb Hensarling, Jindal, Recession, Terrorists
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Rep. Hensarling Channels Rumsfeld
Monday, February 9th, 2009
I never thought Barack Obama’s post-partisan unity shtick would work. So I’m not surprised that no matter how much Obama reaches out to Republicans, they abuse the privilege.
So, is Obama finally wising up? The good news is he’s beginning to make more aggressive use of the presidential bully pulpit to promote the fiscal stimulus bill.
On the other hand, Obama seems to be in triangulation mode, apparently buying into GOP “centrists'” proposed tax and spending cuts.
Somebody please clue the President into this fundamental precept:
Give Republicans an inch and they’ll take you — hard.
Tags: Aphorisms, Bipartisanship, Bully Pulpit, GOP Humor, Negotiations, Obama, Republicans Humor, Stimulus Bill
Posted in Barack Obama, Congress Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Mad Thoughts, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Twisted Aphorisms | 2 Comments »
Sunday, February 8th, 2009
Are Republicans insane? Their bombastic rants and stimulus bill obstructionism could easily lead to that conclusion.
But I think there’s a more basic explanation. Republicans are simply being consistent with their long-held GOP credo:
If at first you don’t succeed, make sure your successors don’t either.
Tags: Aphorisms, GOP, Obstructionism, Republicans Humor, Stimulus Bill
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Mad Thoughts, Political Commentary, Political Jokes & One-Liners, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Twisted Aphorisms | Comments Off on Mad Thought Of The Day
Thursday, January 29th, 2009
I was glad to see that at least some House and Senate Democrats want to take back the economic stimulus package concessions they gave Republicans in return for what turned out to be a grand total of zero votes. After all, as my latest limerick says, “No Quid? No Quo!”
No Quid? No Quo!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The stimulus bill was jam-packed
With concessions the GOP backed.
Yet the whole GOP
Nixed the bill. Seems to me
That the Dems should those changes redact.
Tags: Concessions, Democrats, Economic Stimulus Package, House Satire, Quid Pro Quo, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Stimulus Bill, Votes
Posted in Congress Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 3 Comments »
Monday, January 12th, 2009
Mary Pilon, of the Wall Street Journal, wrote a delightful article about financial poetry entitled Fannie, Freddie, Bear & Hard Times: Wall Street’s Collapse, Told in Rhymes. And I was delighted and honored to be one of several financial poets Ms. Pilon profiled in her article.
Tags: Financial Poets, Mary Pilon, Media Mentions, Money Poetry, Wall Street Journal
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Political Verse, TARP Humor | Comments Off on Wall Street Journal Profiles Financial Poets … Including Me
Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008
Rachel Maddow says “We should all become banks.” Why? Because all it takes for banks to get lots of taxpayer TARP money is a simple two page application. And the best part is that banks don’t have to account for the cash. (Bush’s Treasury Department requires no transparency or accountability.)
That calls for a limerick, don’t you think?
Banks To Taxpayers: Drop Dead!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Where’s your money? You’ve no right to know.
Banks account for your dough? Ho! Ho! Ho!
We are rich and white collar —
Won’t help if you holler.
Go pester a unionized co!
Tags: Accountability, Banking Satire, Banks, Hank Paulson, Maddow, MSNBC, TARP Application, Taxpayers, Transparency, Treasury, Unions, White Collar
Posted in Banking Humor, Business Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Henry Paulson, Paulson Plan, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Rachel Maddow, TARP Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
According to the GAO, TARP (the gazillion dollar Troubled Asset Relief Program) is seriously lacking in oversight. Why? Because of a single Senator’s anonymous block on the program’s IG (Inspector General) nominee.
Sen. Max Baucus, the fellow who made sure the TARP bill provided for an IG, isn’t too pleased. And that brings me to my latest limerick:
I’m never a person to carp,
But nobody oversees TARP.
One anonymous “hold”
Stopped the process out cold
Of confirming an IG who’s sharp.
Tags: Anonymous Blocks, Bailout, GAO, Inspector General, Max Baucus, Senate Satire, TARP
Posted in Ben Bernanke, Business Humor, Congress Humor, Corruption Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, Legislation Humor, Max Baucus, Paulson Plan, Political Limericks, Republicans Humor, TARP Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, October 23rd, 2008
After seeing Sarah Palin prance around in so much stylish, pricey-looking apparel, I wrongly assumed Alaska was so sort of fashion Mecca. But sorry, Alaska. It turns out that Palin’s $150K wardrobe hails from Saks Fifth Avenue in St. Louis and New York and Neiman Marcus in Minneapolis, all courtesy of the RNC and personal shopper Jeff Larson.
So here’s what I want to know: Does John McCain’s tax plan provide a $150K tax credit for personal shoppers?
Where’s My Personal Shopper?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin, you’re taking some heat
For your clothing which, granted, is neat.
But with budgets austere
Why wear clothing so dear?
And just who are you calling elite?
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Elite, Governor Palin, Jeff Larson, Neiman Marcus, Personal Shopper, Pricey Clothing, Republican National Committee, RNC, Saks Fifth Avenue, Sarah Palin Wardrobe, Senator McCain, Tax Credit
Posted in Campaign Humor, Economy Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, RNC Humor, Sarah Palin, Tax & Budget Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, September 30th, 2008
Even The Wall Street Journal’s editorial page thinks Republicans are crybabies about the bailout bill:
House Republicans share the blame, and not only because they opposed the bill by about two-to-one, 133-65. Their immediate response was to say that many of their Members turned against the bill at the last minute because Ms. Pelosi gave her nasty speech. So they are saying that Republicans chose to oppose something they think is in the national interest merely because of a partisan slight. Thank heaven these guys weren’t at Valley Forge.
An Ode To Crybaby Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republican leaders assert
That the plan that attempts to avert
A depression just failed
Cuz Pelosi’s speech nailed
Bush’s failures — their feelings were hurt.
They are patriots first, they proclaim,
But when action’s a must they hurl blame,
Rushing out to condemn
“Hurtful” words from a Dem.
They treat critical bills like a game.
Tags: Crybabies, Economic Meltdown, Economy Satire, Finance Haiku, Financial Verse, Fiscal Crisis TARP, House Republicans, Money Poem, Wall Street Journal, Wall Street Woes
Posted in Ben Bernanke, Business Humor, Congress Humor, Economy Humor, Federal Reserve, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Henry Paulson, House Satire, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | Comments Off on An Ode To Crybaby Republicans
Tough Negotiators, Those Bushies!
Thursday, March 19th, 2009I practiced law for over a dozen years and negotiated lots of contracts. And, unlike the Bush administration, I always kept my poker face. Why? Because if you want the best possible deal, you must make the other party think that he needs you more than you need him.
So, for example, when you tell banks that they’re too big to fail, you disincentivize them from cooperating, or even telling you the truth. That’s why I’m not surprised that 13 of the “top 23 private recipients of taxpayer-funded bailouts under the $700 billion program” enacted by the Bush administration “owed more than $220 million in unpaid federal taxes” and that they lied about it on their TARP contracts.
Why bother being honest? After all, it’s not as if Bush’s Treasury Department made them back up their statements with actual tax records. Of course not — they were too big to fail.
This brings me to my latest limerick:
Tough Negotiators, Those Bushies!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear bank, we can not let you fail.
You’re too big. Pay no mind if we wail
That you owe us back tax.
Do not worry. Relax!
Cuz that huge bailout check’s in the mail.
Tags: Bailout Humor, Banks, Bush, Contracts, Law Satire, Legal Humor, Lies, Negotiating, Paulson, TARP, Taxes, Taxpayers, Treasury
Posted in Banking Humor, Ben Bernanke, Business Humor, Corruption Humor, Crime, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, George Bush Satire, Henry Paulson, Law Satire, Paulson Plan, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, TARP Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, Tim Geithner | 4 Comments »