Hey guitarists, you need a new axe? You like Trump? You’ll be thrilled to the max, Cuz the grifter’s now selling Guitars. There’s no telling What’s next … though my bet’s on the sax.
Most of my political verse takes the form of limericks or haiku. But this one is a four-liner – a quatrain:
I’m not shocked by Trump’s Cabinet picks. I’m not stunned by each deviant creature. Because sexual crimes against chicks For Trump ain’t a bug, but a feature.
The Dems and the press-folk are keen On playing a blame game, obscene. But they’re missing the point In their haste to anoint A fall guy: Most voters are mean!
On Facebook, wherever I look, I see posts penned by folks who are shook. They’re depressed, just like me. Not one whisper of glee! Well, at least I’ve blocked fans of the CROOK!
Both my heart and my mind can’t stop achin’; Human decency’s vanquished, forsaken. Trump’s so clearly depraved, That I thought we’d be saved, But the virtuous path was not taken.
Dear Trump Voters: You surely must know That he’s ruthless; it’s NOT just for show. Yet despite, or because Of his numerous flaws, You’ve elected Democracy’s Foe.
Election Day’s here and I’m tense. My fear of a Trump win’s immense. I keep telling myself: “Stick your angst on some shelf; Voters surely can NOT be THAT dense!”
Dear Gals: Secret votes are your right! So PLEASE don’t vote “Trump” out of fright. “Yes” your spouse, if you must, But support who you trust… And give voice to your choice in this fight.
“Stay on message,” Trump’s people advise. But its essence is hatred and lies. It’s divisive and crude, Racist, fascist, and lewd– A clear message sane folks should despise.
The great Post has been sullied by fear. Give that cowardly Bezos a jeer! WaPo planned to endorse VP Harris, of course. But Jeff quashed it and kissed Donald’s rear.
The Donald faults China and trade. “Huge tariffs,” he cries, “must be paid.” “They steal jobs from our nation,” He rants to ovation. But THAT’s where Trump’s Bibles are made.
No, I am NOT making this up. Here’s a quote from CBS News:
“Thousands of Donald Trump’s “God Bless the USA” Bibles — sold for $59.99 each — were printed in a country that the former president has frequently accused of engaging in unfair trade practices and stealing American jobs: China.”
My latest 3-verse limerick was inspired by a CNN article that included this paragraph: “Roberts was shaken by the adverse public reaction to his decision affording Trump substantial immunity from criminal prosecution. His protestations that the case concerned the presidency, not Trump, held little currency.”
Poor John Roberts is in a deep funk; His beloved court’s stature has shrunk. And it’s largely his fault For harsh rulings that halt Basic rights. He’s a punk and a skunk.
About justice his court doesn’t care. There’s no effort to ever be fair. It treats stare decisis Like trash. We’ve a crisis; Sound rulings are brutally rare!
So if Roberts is sad, fine by me! For the court must be changed. You agree? Then be sure to vote Dem. No more hawing. Don’t hem! It’s the one way to stem the debris.
Washington Post Headline: “Trump in Pa.: Digressions, threats and vows to be ‘protector’ of women”
The “Protector of Women” — that’s me, Proclaims Trump. Just elect me; you’ll see. Yes, the man who destroyed Roe v. Wade seems annoyed That we long to be Donald Trump-free.
How absurd that a sexual abuser, One who often defames his accuser, Now audaciously claims He’ll protect all the dames If he wins. Let’s make sure he’s the LOSER!
“In Ohio, they’re eating the cats! They are eating the pets,” yell the rats, Known as Donald and Vance, Harming Haitians with rants; Racist lies told by cads in red hats.
When informed it’s not true, they both sneer And continue repeating their smear, Cuz they really don’t care If there’s pet-eating there. Told to cease and desist, they just jeer.
“You’re endangering innocent folk,” They’re advised, but to Trump that’s a joke; Donald’s fans gets their highs From enjoying Trump’s lies. Give up lying? No, THAT would be “WOKE!”
Spoiled brat, cry-baby Trump actually posted this on his money-bleeding, inaptly named Truth Social: “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!”
On Truth Social, The Donald lashed out; A failed effort to weaponize clout. His “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!” Angered Swifties. They’re miffed! Quite the gift for the VEEP from that lout!
Trump’s pretending he won the debate, Citing polls (non-existent) that rate Him the winner by lots. (Were they written by bots?) Dotty Don can’t face up to his fate.
Dear Veep Harris, I thank you for winning And demolishing Trump. I’m still grinning! On the eve of my birthday, You gave me a mirth day… Watching bait-taking Trump lose each inning.
JD Vance has a fabulous plan To reduce childcare costs. What a man! It’s not tax breaks or grants: Just cry “Help!” to the aunts, Uncles, granddads, and each weary gran.
Dear Political Press, please take note: Stop reframing Trump’s rants; use a quote! No more rend’ring coherent His spewings aberrant; Cease helping him skew how folks vote!
So…, you know all those oddball rally rants about wind and bacon, sharks and electrocution, “Alphonse” Capone, and the “late, great Hannibal Lecter?” According to Trump, he’s doing the “weave,” which makes him an oratorical genius:
Trump’s meandering salad linguistic Is (to Donald) a “weave” — his euphuistic, Novel term for confusing And logic-abusing Addresses. (Turns out they’re artistic!)
Trump’s digressions, he says, all make sense; They are woven with brilliance intense. He defies expectations With dazzling orations. Seems the Donald’s a “genius” immense.
So the next time you hear Donald speak, Do not call him off-script or oblique. With his language command, He’s the best in the land; A true maestro of flapping his beak.
