Archive for the ‘Constitution Humor’ Category
Friday, December 14th, 2012
I’ve been meaning to write a serious limerick about gun violence for a long time. Today’s tragic Newtown Connecticut school shooting prompted this verse:
Massacre Message (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mindless murder and mayhem in schools.
U.S. mall assaults — gun wielding ghouls.
We seek a solution,
But hear: “Constitution!”
We need leaders — not NRA tools!
Tags: Adam Lanza, Cowardly Politicians, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, Leadership Humor, Newtown Connecticut School Shootings, Sandy Hook, Second Amendment, U.S. Constitution
Posted in Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, July 25th, 2012
Roger Simon says it all about gun baloney, but I still have to write this limerick:
Outgunned By Cowardice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Both Obama and Mitt are distressed,
By the movie house murders depressed.
But those gun lobby fears
Beget action-free tears:
Tighten gun control? Surely you jest!
(Cross-posted on Limerick Debate.)
Tags: Aurora Colorado Shootings, Barack Obama, Colorado Theater Shooting, Cowardly Politicians, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, Leadership Humor, Mitt Romney, Second Amendment, U.S. Constitution
Posted in 44 Humor, Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 4 Comments »
Monday, July 2nd, 2012
Open Limerick To Chief Justice John Roberts
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Justice Roberts, your allies are mean,
And their attitude’s often obscene.
When they hate one decision,
Their answer’s derision:
Your meds fried your brain. No more sheen!
With people like that in your camp,
Perhaps it is time to revamp
Your views and opinions.
Dump low-lives as minions.
Convert! Be a working man’s champ.
Tags: ACA, Affordable Care Act, GOP Humor, Health Care Reform, Health Reform, Justice John Roberts, Law Humor, Legal Verse, Obamacare, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court Limerick, U.S. Constitution, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court | 10 Comments »
Friday, June 29th, 2012
Republicans are in shock over the U.S. Supreme Court’s “Obamacare” decision. They’d been so sure they had Justice John Roberts in their pockets, that they’re behaving like betrayed lovers: How dare he side with the liberal wing of the court on the constitutionality question!
Many of them are enraged to the point of irrationality. In fact, even Justice Roberts seems to have noticed the GOP’s “what have you done for me lately” nastiness. He actually joked about going into hiding.
GOP Falls Out Of Love With Roberts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The decision John Roberts just penned
Has sent ACA foes round the bend.
Up till now he’d promote
All their views with his vote.
Has their Roberts’ romance reached an end?
Tags: ACA, Affordable Care Act, GOP Humor, Health Care Reform, Health Reform, Justice John Roberts, Law Humor, Legal Verse, Obamacare, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court Limerick, U.S. Constitution, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court | 2 Comments »
Thursday, April 5th, 2012
Wow! When I wasn’t looking, President Obama apparently mugged the U.S. Supreme Court:
To the fainting couch! Obama attacked the Supreme Court and threatened it with a backlash, should it strike down his tyrannical scheme to impose a government takeover of health care on the nation!
That’s what many conservative writers and even some centrist ones are arguing. They are saying that Obama’s words about the Court yesterday were “unsettling” and a “witch-hunt,” and they’re likening them to F.D.R.’s efforts to pack the Court in retaliation for decisions striking down New Deal initiatives.
Please. If what Obama said yesterday is an “attack,” it’s pretty timid stuff indeed.
SCOTUS-Scolding Scandal? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The very same wingnuts who blast
So-called “activist courts” are aghast
And are faulting Obama
With petulant drama:
“He’s attacking the Court,” they lambaste.
Seems those wingnut Supremes need a hug,
Cuz Obama’s a meanie and “thug.”
His complaint, although mild,
Is driving them wild.
Those guys are sure easy to bug.
Tags: Activist Courts, Activist Judge, Barack Obama, Federal Courts, Health Care Reform, Judicial Review Humor, Judiciary Satire, Legal Verse, Litigation Humor, Obamacare, SCOTUS, Supreme Court Humor, Wingnuts
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, Constitutional Crisis, Health Satire, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court, Wingnuts | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, April 3rd, 2012
Chances are, you’ve heard about the latest Supreme Court travesty:
In a 5-4 decision, the court ruled against a New Jersey man erroneously arrested during a 2005 traffic stop for a fine he had already paid. Today’s ruling holds that even people arrested for minor offenses can be subjected to strip searches.
Supreme Indecency (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Thanks to Kennedy, Roberts, Scalia,
And their pals, cops can strip ya and see ya.
They don’t need any reason:
It’s strip searching season.
Our privacy’s gone! Mama mia!
Tags: ACLU, Arrests Limerick, Chief Justice John Roberts, Constitution Verse, Crime & Punishment, Criminal Justice, Invasion of Privacy, Justice Anthony Kennedy, Justice Antonin Scalia, Justice Clarence Thomas, Justice Samuel Alito Jr., Law Humor, Legal Verse, New Jersey, Privacy Humor, Strip Searches, Supreme Court Limerick, Traffic Stop, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Constitution Humor, Constitutional Crisis, Crime, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Privacy Humor, Supreme Court | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, February 21st, 2012
When I see a title like this, I pretty much have to write a limerick: Santorum Good for Chastity-Belt Sales? Manufacturer Says, “We’ve Had a Boost”
The Chastity Chase (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s good news for Republican men:
You can guard against gals with a yen
For sex you deem evil
With something primeval:
Yes chastity belts — Curb your hen!
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Campaign Humor, Chastity Belts, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, Feminist Limerick, GOP Humor, Health Care, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum, Sexist Humor
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | 2 Comments »
Monday, February 20th, 2012
Over the years, I’ve met many post-feminist women — gals who think the struggle is over, and who see no further need for feminism. I wonder what they think of the Republicans’ rampant, re-energized War On Women.
Limerick Ode To Feminism
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’ve met women far younger than I
Who’ve never quite understood why
We need feminist gals.
It seems they and their pals
See no ceiling of glass — just the sky.
They think gender-based battles are done,
And the feminist fight has been won.
Yet in merely a flash,
Rights can turn into ash:
Once again, we are under the gun.
(Related Posts: Dear Bedroom-Invading Republicans, More Contraceptive Madness, Feminist Humor Category)
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Contraception Humor, Feminist Limerick, Health Care, Republicans Humor, Sexist Humor
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Feminism Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, February 15th, 2012
What century is this? The aggressive anti-contraception GOP stance makes me wonder whether I bought the wrong calendar.
Rick Santorum, a man who’s dangerously close to snatching the Republican presidential nomination away from Mitt Romney, apparently wants to preside over an antediluvian America: Here’s Santorum explaining why he wants to fight “the dangers of contraception:”
It’s not okay because it’s a license to do things in the sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.
And Rick is far from the only bedroom-obsessed Republican. GOP over-reach regarding contraception is approaching epic proportions:
Last week, Freshman Senator Roy Blunt (R-MO) filed legislation to allow any employer, religiously affiliated or not, to refuse to cover any essential or preventive health service, not just contraceptives, based on the “religious belief or moral conviction” of the employer. Word from DC is that Blunt and allies will attempt to add the provision as an amendment to other legislation now moving through the Senate….
The fact that American voters are overwhelmingly pro-birth control is apparently irrelevant to Republican politicians.
Perhaps a limerick might help Republican pols get the message:
Dear Bedroom-Invading Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Republican pols, please abstain
From ent’ring my bedroom domain.
And also stay out
Of my bathroom. Don’t pout!
If you’re truly “small gov,” you’ll refrain.
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Campaign Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Humor, Employers, Feminist Limerick, Health Care, Missouri, Mitt Romney, Religion Humor, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum, Roy Blunt, Sexist Humor, Small Government
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Campaign Humor, Congress Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum, Roy Blunt Humor | 3 Comments »
Thursday, January 5th, 2012
In case you were wondering, Rick Santorum still thinks states have the right to outlaw contraception. Why? Because it’s “a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”
Limerick Ode To Sex-Obsessed Santorum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Contraception’s immoral, says Rick,
Cuz it licenses sex with a chick
To whom you ain’t wed.
So ban it instead!
Vote Santorum: Stop sex that is sick.
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Campaign Satire, Constitution Verse, Contraception Humor, Election Humor, Rick Santorum, States Rights
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Sex-Obsessed Santorum
Wednesday, August 3rd, 2011
I’m constantly running into Tenth Amendment states’ rights hypocrisy, most often concerning abortion rights and same sex marriage. Texas Governor Rick Perry is but the latest example: He’s now calling for a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage and abortion.
Limerick Ode To 10th Amendment Hypocrisy
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Perry’s a fan of states’ rights:
10th amendment — he loves its delights.
But gay marriage? Abortion?
Please brace for contortion:
He’d smite them through federal fights.
Tags: Abortion Rights, Constitution Verse, Gay Marriage, Presidential Campaign Humor, Rick Perry, Same Sex Marriage, States Rights, Texas Humor, U.S. Constitution
Posted in Abortion Rights, Constitution Humor, Election Satire, Gay Rights, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Texas Humor, Wingnuts | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, October 20th, 2010
By now you’ve surely heard about Delaware Republican Senatorial candidate Christine O’Donnell’s astonishing screw-up in her debate against opponent Chris Coons. I’m speaking, of course, of her First Amendment gaffe. In her now infamous exchange (in a law school, yet) Tea-Partier O’Donnell “appeared to be aggressively ignorant of the fact that the First Amendment requires the separation of church and state.”
That brings me to my latest Limerick:
Yet Another Limerick Ode To Christine O’Donnell
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Debating our Fed Constitution
Can be tough when your grasp’s Lilliputian:
Hence O’Donnell’s conflation
Of church and our nation.
Her savvy could use evolution.
(Here’s my previous limerick about Christine O’Donnell.)
Tags: Campaign Satire, Chris Coons, Christine O'Donnell, Church and State, Debate Limerick, Delaware, Election Humor, First Amendment, Gaffes, Religion Humor, U.S. Constitution
Posted in Campaign Humor, Christine O'Donnell, Constitution Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Tea Parties, Wingnuts | 8 Comments »
Tuesday, August 17th, 2010
I’m never surprised when Republicans try to trash the U.S. Constitution. But Senator Harry Reid’s position about the proposed Cordoba House — the inaccurately nicknamed “Ground Zero Mosque” — disappointed me.
But then what do I know? I’m just a 1st amendment fan who lives in New York City. And I’d rather see a mosque than a burned out former Burlington Coat Factory store.
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Mosque Mockery
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A “Ground Zero Mosque” — oh how shocking!
Hurray for the folks who are blocking
That mosque to replace
The old coat-selling place.
If perchance you can’t tell — yes, I’m mocking.
Tags: Burlington Coat Factory, Constitution Verse, Cordoba House, First Amendment, Ground Zero, Harry Reid, Islamic Center, Mosque Limerick, New York City, nine-eleven, Religious Humor
Posted in 9/11 Satire, Constitution Humor, Faux Controversies, Harry Reid, New York Politics, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire | 7 Comments »
Friday, August 6th, 2010
The gay-bashers are at it again, freaking out at Judge Vaughn Walker’s pro-gay marriage Proposition 8 decision in Perry v. Schwarzenegger. The attacks claim, among other things, that:
The ruling is a travesty of justice because Walker himself is reportedly gay – and because he’s gay, he should’ve removed himself from the case!
Boy, am I glad I never parlayed my law degree into a judgeship. Because, based on this “reasoning,” I would have been duty-bound to recuse myself from any case involving women, Jews, short people, straights, New Yorkers, satirists, versifiers, lawyers, oboe players, agnostics, and people older than … uh … never mind.
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Judge Walker’s Critics — Divorced From Reason
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Judge Walker’s well-reasoned decision
Has been met with gay-bashing derision:
He’s “reportedly gay,”
So was biased their way.
Oh, just straight guys have unbiased vision?
Tags: Bias Humor, Gay Marriage, Judge Vaughn Walker, Judiciary Humor, Legal Satire, Litigation Humor, Perry V. Schwarzenegger, Proposition 8
Posted in California Satire, Constitution Humor, Gay Rights, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Social Satire | 8 Comments »
Wednesday, May 5th, 2010
My husband Mark and I live in New York City and frequently dine and see plays in the Times Square area. In fact, had the two of us not been so exhausted from our Las Vegas vacation, that’s where we probably would have been Saturday night. Perhaps that’s why I’m especially offended by John McCain’s apparent desire to undermine the prosecution of alleged terrorists.
What am I talking about? McCain said it would be a “serious mistake” if car bombing suspect Faisal Shahzad, a naturalized American citizen, was Mirandized.
I’m sorry, but the only way Mirandizing Shahzad would be a mistake is if your goal is to taint the evidence, get it thrown out of court, and lose the damn case.
And that brings me to my latest two-verse limerick:
John McCain — Ignoramus, Liar, Or Terrorist Sympathizer?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Shahzad was Mirandized. Oh my!
Cue McCain and his pandering lie.
To warn him was wrong—
That’s McCain’s specious song.
He malpractices law on the fly.
For Miranda’s a citizen’s right.
Fail to warn him? You’re in for a fight.
Cuz evidence gotten
That way is deemed rotten.
Acquittal is what you invite.
Tags: Car Bombing, Constitution Verse, Criminal Justice, Criminal Law, Faisal Shahzad, John McCain, Legal Verse, Miranda Rights, Terrorism, Terrorist Trials, Times Square
Posted in Constitution Humor, FBI Humor, John McCain, Law Satire, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Publicity Hounds, Terrorism | 7 Comments »
Friday, March 26th, 2010
Credit where credit is due: When it comes to self-contradiction, Mitt Romney is both fearless and peerless.
Once a staunch advocate of individual health insurance mandates — the Massachusetts governor who ardently defended their constitutionality — Romney has flip-flopped. Now that they’re required by the Democrats’ Affordable Care Act, they’ve magically turned unconstitutional.
Of course, constant flip-flops can be hard on the constitution. So it’s no surprise that Mitt Romney was for individual mandates before he was against them.
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Mitt Romney: Constitutionally Confused
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Individual mandates are great,
Said Mitt re Mass. health bill’s debate.
Now he swears that they’re awful
And even unlawful.
Your claims, my dear Mitt — get them straight.
Tags: Affordable Care Act, Constitution Verse, Health Care Reform, Health Insurance, Legal Humor, Legislation Satire, Massachusetts, Mitt Romney, Republican Flip-Flops
Posted in Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Insurance Humor, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Legislation Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 4 Comments »
Monday, January 25th, 2010
There’s nothing funny about the U.S. Supreme Court’s activist ruling in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission. Overruling long-held precedents, it gives corporations free rein to buy political influence, all in the name of “corporate personhood” and “free speech.”
Nor is there anything funny about the hypocrisy of self-described anti-judicial-activism Republicans who laud this calamitous decision.
And, alas, there’s nothing funny about this limerick:
Democracy’s Demise?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Justice Roberts and co are unbound,
Driving precedents precious aground.
Yet Republicans cheer,
And the sobs that we hear
Are the sounds of democracy drowned.
********
Lance Mannion managed to extract some humor from this judicial travesty.
Tags: Campaign Finance Reform, Citizens United, Corporate Personhood, Democracy, First Amendment, Free Speech, Justice John Roberts, Legal Verse, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Constitutional Crisis, Democracy Humor, Election Satire, FEC Satire, Free Speech, Hypocrisy Humor, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Supreme Court | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
President Obama recently used the e-word in connection with his yet-to-be-named U.S. Supreme Court nominee, and the Republicans were (or pretended to be) horrified. Senator Orrin Hatch claimed empathy was a “code word for an activist judge”, while the ever-entertaining Michael Steele said in his inimitable, classy fashion, “I’ll give you empathy. Empathize right on your behind!”
But while many Democrats were outraged by Republican reaction, I’m empathetic enough to appreciate where they’re coming from:
Empathy is such an ugly word:
Injudicious moral flaw.
Empathy is totally absurd
And violates the rule of law.
(With my apologies to Billy Joel)
(My previous (and full length) song parody to this song is here.)
Tags: Activist Judge, Empathy. Republicans, GOP, Judges, Law Satire, Michael Steele, Obama, Orrin Hatch, Supreme Court
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Michael Steele, Music Humor, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Song Parodies, Supreme Court | 1 Comment »
Sunday, April 19th, 2009
My latest double limerick, written in an antibiotic haze and inspired by Texas Gov. Rick Perry’s secession talk brouhaha:
Yet Another Ode To Republican Hypocrisy
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Under Bush left-dissent equaled treason.
So Republicans claimed without reason.
Now Obama is prez
(A commie Chavez)
And secession is righteous — not teasin’.
Yes Gov. Perry and co. say it’s fine —
This unconstitutional whine:
Secede cuz Barack
Is a Europy Jacques.
Then they pray to Ron Reagan. Divine!
Tags: Constitution, Dissent, Obama, Reagan Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Secession, Texas Humor, Treason
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Ronald Reagan, Texas Humor, Wingnuts | 8 Comments »
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
Cool news! Nearly 4000 people submitted haiku to the McPalin Haiku Hysteria contest held by People For The American Way and The Nation Magazine. And I’m one of the twelve finalists!!! So I’d really appreciate your voting for my haiku here. The three winning haiku will be published in The Nation.
We were allowed to submit up to three haiku, and here are the three I submitted. (The first one is the haiku that made the finals.)
Palin knows nothing
About the Constitution.
Puppets don’t have to.
An anti-choice veep
Who opposes free rape kits?
Thanks, John, but no thanks.
Would Palin court picks
Destroy the Constitution?
You betcha! Wink, wink.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Constitution Verse, Election Humor, Haiku Contest, Nation Magazine, Palin Haiku, People For The American Way, PFAW Contest
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 4 Comments »
GOP Falls Out Of Love With Roberts (Limerick)
Friday, June 29th, 2012Republicans are in shock over the U.S. Supreme Court’s “Obamacare” decision. They’d been so sure they had Justice John Roberts in their pockets, that they’re behaving like betrayed lovers: How dare he side with the liberal wing of the court on the constitutionality question!
Many of them are enraged to the point of irrationality. In fact, even Justice Roberts seems to have noticed the GOP’s “what have you done for me lately” nastiness. He actually joked about going into hiding.
GOP Falls Out Of Love With Roberts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The decision John Roberts just penned
Has sent ACA foes round the bend.
Up till now he’d promote
All their views with his vote.
Has their Roberts’ romance reached an end?
Tags: ACA, Affordable Care Act, GOP Humor, Health Care Reform, Health Reform, Justice John Roberts, Law Humor, Legal Verse, Obamacare, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court Limerick, U.S. Constitution, U.S. Supreme Court
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court | 2 Comments »