Archive for October, 2008
Wednesday, October 29th, 2008
Whenever John McCain is asked about Sarah Palin’s qualifications, he falls back on the paternal-sounding (and condescending) “I couldn’t be more proud” of Palin response. But something tells me he doesn’t use the word “proud” in private:
McCain & Palin: The Not Ready For Prime Time Duo
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There’s a ticket that can’t get along
Cuz the chemistry’s totally wrong.
John may claim to be proud
Of Gov. Palin out loud.
But his eyes say, “Give Sarah the gong!”
Tags: Campaign, Election, GOP, Humor, Limericks, McCain, Palin, Presidential, Prime Time, Republicans Humor, Satire, Verse
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 27th, 2008
I’m a bit late on this. But I was amused to read that Joe Klein has suffered the same fate as Maureen Dowd — banishment from the McCain / Palin planes:
Just Call It The McPettiness Express
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Beware of the wrath of McCain.
If you’re mean you’ll be barred from his plane.
You’ll join Klein and Mo Dowd —
That non-patriot crowd.
Wave goodbye to the “straight talk” campaign.
Tags: Campaign, Election, Humor, Joe Klein, Maureen Dowd, McCain, Media, Patriots, Pettiness, Planes, Press, Satire, Straight Talk Express, Transportation
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Sarah Palin | Comments Off on Just Call It The McPettiness Express
Thursday, October 23rd, 2008
It’s hard to believe, but Sarah Palin told People Magazine that she’s an “intellectual.” Sorry, Governor Palin, but I’ve known some intellectuals, and you ain’t no intellectual:
Does Sarah Palin Even Know What Intellectual Means?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin’s astonishing claim?
She’s a smart, “intellectual” dame.
That gal may be bright
And quite tough in a fight,
But her intellect’s woefully lame.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Governor Palin, Intellectual, People Magazine
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 2 Comments »
Thursday, October 23rd, 2008
After seeing Sarah Palin prance around in so much stylish, pricey-looking apparel, I wrongly assumed Alaska was so sort of fashion Mecca. But sorry, Alaska. It turns out that Palin’s $150K wardrobe hails from Saks Fifth Avenue in St. Louis and New York and Neiman Marcus in Minneapolis, all courtesy of the RNC and personal shopper Jeff Larson.
So here’s what I want to know: Does John McCain’s tax plan provide a $150K tax credit for personal shoppers?
Where’s My Personal Shopper?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin, you’re taking some heat
For your clothing which, granted, is neat.
But with budgets austere
Why wear clothing so dear?
And just who are you calling elite?
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Elite, Governor Palin, Jeff Larson, Neiman Marcus, Personal Shopper, Pricey Clothing, Republican National Committee, RNC, Saks Fifth Avenue, Sarah Palin Wardrobe, Senator McCain, Tax Credit
Posted in Campaign Humor, Economy Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, RNC Humor, Sarah Palin, Tax & Budget Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
Cool news! Nearly 4000 people submitted haiku to the McPalin Haiku Hysteria contest held by People For The American Way and The Nation Magazine. And I’m one of the twelve finalists!!! So I’d really appreciate your voting for my haiku here. The three winning haiku will be published in The Nation.
We were allowed to submit up to three haiku, and here are the three I submitted. (The first one is the haiku that made the finals.)
Palin knows nothing
About the Constitution.
Puppets don’t have to.
An anti-choice veep
Who opposes free rape kits?
Thanks, John, but no thanks.
Would Palin court picks
Destroy the Constitution?
You betcha! Wink, wink.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Constitution Verse, Election Humor, Haiku Contest, Nation Magazine, Palin Haiku, People For The American Way, PFAW Contest
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
What on earth is the matter with Republicans like Rep. Michelle Bachmann and Rep. Robin Hayes? Not only do they say insane things, but they deny saying them, as if recording devices had never been invented:
Is GOP Idiocy Real, Or Is It Memorex?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When Republicans get in a scrape,
Having said something bad their “escape”
Is to blithely deny
That they said it and lie.
Someone please tell these liars, there’s tape.
Tags: Dishonesty Humor, GOP Idiocy, GOP Lies, Liars, Memorex, Michele Bachmann, Recording Devices, Robin Hayes
Posted in Congress Humor, GOP Humor, House Satire, Michele Bachmann, Political Limericks, Political Verse | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
Sarah Palin has a very strange relationship with geography. Who else do you know who:
1) Keeps an eye on Russia from her Alaska bedroom window;
2) Thinks Afghanistan is “our neighboring country;”
3) Describes New Hampshire as being part of our “great Northwest;” and
4) Tells crowds how much she enjoys visiting “pro-America areas” of America.
Come to think of it, that last one does make some sense to me: Palin’s marriage to a (presumably reformed) secessionist, must surely make meeting pro-America Americans refreshing, indeed.
However, I do remain concerned about Palin’s Afghanistan and New Hampshire problem:
Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin’s geography gap
Is appalling. Please give her a map.
This isn’t a test,
But New Hampshire? Northwest?
On our “neighbor” Afghanistan’s lap?
Tags: Afghanistan, Alaska, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Geography Humor, Governor Palin, Maps, New Hampshire, Russia
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Foreign Policy, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Sarah Palin | Comments Off on Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin
Thursday, October 16th, 2008
Sarcastic air-quotes around “health” in “health of the mother”? Who the hell uses sarcastic air-quotes anymore … let alone when referring to women’s health? Big mistake, Senator McCain!
Which reminds me — during last night’s debate I had a revelation about the gravitas-test versus the guy-you’d-enjoy-having-a-beer-with-test. In this year’s election, gravitas-guy (Obama) is also the fellow I’d enjoy having a beer with … if only I liked beer:
Ode To John “Air-Quotes” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Many voters ask: Whose views are best,
As opposed to the drinking-pal test.
But whichever the measure,
Obama’s my pleasure.
McCain? He’s a cranky old pest.
Tags: Air Quotes, Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Drinking Pals, Election Humor, McCain Verse, Mother's Health, Obama poem, Presidential Election, Sarcasm, Women's Health
Posted in Abortion Rights, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, Health Satire, John McCain, Social Satire | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
My mother-in-law
Thinks Obama is Muslim —
Likes McCain. Oy vey!
Tags: McCain Verse, Mothers-in-law Humor, Muslim Haiku, Obama Haiku, Relatives Humor, Yiddish Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, General Humor, John McCain, News Haiku & Senryu | Comments Off on Vetting My Relatives (Haiku)
Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
David Frum, infamous for fathering (or at least taking credit for fathering) the phrase “Axis of Evil,” took on the wrong person last night. I’m referring, of course, to Rachel Maddow.
Frum (without any provocation) insulted Maddow several times during his interview on Rachel’s MSNBC show. And the classy and brilliant Maddow let him have it in such a gracious manner, Frum didn’t seem to know what hit him. Bravo Rachel!!!
The contrast between Frum’s rude, condescending behavior and Maddow’s calm, graceful, yet powerful take-down was a beautiful thing to watch. (You can see the Maddow/Frum clip here.)
I thought I’d celebrate with a limerick:
Ode To David Frum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a fellow named Frum
Who made a mistake rather dumb:
He started a fight
With Ms. Maddow one night.
When she finished, he looked like a bum.
Tags: Axis of Evil, David Frum, Frum Verse, Interviews, Maddow Limerick, Media Humor, MSNBC, Rachel Maddow
Posted in David Frum, Media Satire, Rachel Maddow | Comments Off on Ode To David Frum
Sunday, October 12th, 2008
A bipartisan legislative panel in Alaska finds Sarah Palin guilty of abusing her executive power. So is Palin contrite? Hahahahaha!
Actually, I’m find it tough to get my head around Palin’s response. (Unlike so many Republicans, I’ve never been any good at holding two contradictory positions at the same time.)
Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin this weekend disregarded an ethics investigator’s finding that she had abused her executive power as Alaska’s governor and instead embraced a second finding in the report to say that she had been cleared of wrongfully firing her state public safety commissioner. …
In a Saturday conference call with Alaska journalists, Palin said she was “pleased to be cleared of any legal wrongdoing … any hint of any kind of unethical activity there.” She denounced the investigation, calling it “a partisan circus.” …
Okay, I’m not positive, but here’s what seems to be the McCain campaign’s official response to the Troopergate ethics violation report:
1) It exonerates her; and
2) If it hadn’t been an Obama-controlled hit job, it would have exonerated her.
My head hurts.
Sarah In Wonderland
By Madeleine Begun Kane
So what is Gov. Palin’s excuse
For the finding of power abuse?
She pretends it ain’t there,
While she claims it ain’t fair,
With the facts playing games, fast and loose.
Tags: Abuse of Executive Power, Alaska Ethics Violation, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Governor Palin, McCain Campaign, Presidential Election, Troopergate
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Commentary, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Thursday, October 9th, 2008
Team Of Liars
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The McCain/Palin team now is rife
With liars, including John’s wife.
So it’s surely no shock
They’re defaming Barack.
As McCain might say: John, get a life!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Cindy McCain, Defamation, Election Humor, Governor Palin, Obama Verse, Presidential Campaign Humor, Senator McCain
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 8 Comments »
Wednesday, October 8th, 2008
Here’s what I learned from the second presidential debate: If (heaven forbid) Election 2008 has to be resolved in court, the title of the case will be McCain v. That One.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Debate Snark, Election Humor, McCain Temper, Obama Debate, That One
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Uncategorized | Comments Off on What I Learned From Last Night’s Obama / McCain Debate
Tuesday, October 7th, 2008
It’s not easy to make Rudy Giuliani look like a class act. But both McCain and Palin have managed to do it quite handily. While Rudy (on at least one occasion) had the decency to chide an audience member for connecting Democrats with terrorists, McCain and Palin apparently feel no such compunction. Why do I say that? Because they greet anti-Obama audience-shouts like “Treason,” “Terrorist!” and “Kill!” with silence.
McCain And Palin Make Rudy Look Like A Class Act
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John McCain, I sure hope that you’re proud:
You and Palin prompt rage in a crowd.
Your supporters shout swill:
“Treason!” “Terrorist!” “Kill!”
Even Rudy would say: Not allowed!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Crowd Rage, Democrats, Election Humor, Giuliani Limerick, McCain Verse, Palin Poem, Presidential Campaign, Senator Obama, Terrorists, Treason
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Rudy Giuliani, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 7th, 2008
Ode To Attack Dog Palin (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Palin proudly proclaims “I don’t blink!”
(Doesn’t count when it’s merely a wink.)
She attacks with a smile,
Throwing lies cross the aisle —
Slimes Barack as a terrorist fink.
Tags: Attack Dog Politics, Blinks, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Obama Verse, Presidential Campaign, Sarah Palin Limerick, Terrorism, Winks
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Political Verse, Sarah Palin, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 7th, 2008
Sarah Palin Passes Her Reading Test
By Madeleine Begun Kane
To those who say Palin was best,
I’ll concede she debated with zest.
But she read off her notes
All night long, so your votes
Are based on an open book test.
Tags: Biden / Palin Debate, Campaign Satire, Debate Notes, Election Humor, McCain's VP Pick, Open Book Tests, Palin Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Sarah Palin, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 6th, 2008
At first, I was amused by John McCain’s bitter-sounding “life isn’t fair” remark.
Asked why Obama has been rising as the Wall Street crisis has dominated attention, McCain said with a chuckle on Fox News Channel: “Because life isn’t fair.”
But on second thought, I’ve decided McCain is right:
Finally, A McCain Statement I Can Agree With
By Madeleine Begun Kane
McCain’s very wrong about war
And on health care and taxes and more.
But he’s right (though it’s rare)
With his “life isn’t fair,”
Cuz what else could explain Bush v. Gore?
Tags: Bush v. Gore, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Health Care, Legal Humor, Life Isn't Fair, Presidential Election, Senator McCain Humor, Senator Obama, Taxes, War
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Law Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court | 5 Comments »
Thursday, October 2nd, 2008
According to Fred Thompson, Sarah Palin’s inability to name a single Supreme Court case she disagrees with wasn’t her fault. Why not? Because Katie Couric didn’t give her a list of cases. I half-expected Thompson to demand a do-over test.
A Do-Over Supreme Court Test For Palin?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
You’re excused, dear Ms. Palin. Rejoice!
Now that Thompson has lent you his voice,
The court case-test you flunked
Has been strongly debunked
As unfair — wasn’t multiple choice.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Do-Over Tests, Election Humor, Fred Thompson, Governor Palin, Katie Couric, Legal Humor, Presidential Campaign, Supreme Court Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin, Supreme Court | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, October 1st, 2008
Sarah Palin, who likes to refer to herself as “Joe Six Pack“, is trying to dupe us into believing she’s “an everyday, working-class American.” Palin even claims that her “Joe Six Pack” status is why “the Washington elite” don’t think she should be running for Veep. (Apparently it has nothing to do with her making Dan Quayle look like a genius and George Bush look coherent.)
Just wondering: How many “everyday, working-class Americans” do you know who own “a single-engine plane, two boats, two personal watercraft and a half-million-dollar, custom-built home on a lake…”?
Sarah deserves another limerick, don’t you think?
Dear “Everyday Working Class” Sarah
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Your custom-built lake house sounds nice,
And your plane, boats, and tanning device.
But kindly don’t claim
You’re a “working class” dame.
We don’t buy it, so sorry, no dice.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Dan Quayle, Election Humor, Governor Palin, Joe Six Pack, Palin Poem, Presidential Election, Washington Elite, Working Class Humor
Posted in Blame Game, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin | 3 Comments »
Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008Sarah Palin has a very strange relationship with geography. Who else do you know who:
1) Keeps an eye on Russia from her Alaska bedroom window;
2) Thinks Afghanistan is “our neighboring country;”
3) Describes New Hampshire as being part of our “great Northwest;” and
4) Tells crowds how much she enjoys visiting “pro-America areas” of America.
Come to think of it, that last one does make some sense to me: Palin’s marriage to a (presumably reformed) secessionist, must surely make meeting pro-America Americans refreshing, indeed.
However, I do remain concerned about Palin’s Afghanistan and New Hampshire problem:
Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin’s geography gap
Is appalling. Please give her a map.
This isn’t a test,
But New Hampshire? Northwest?
On our “neighbor” Afghanistan’s lap?
Tags: Afghanistan, Alaska, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Geography Humor, Governor Palin, Maps, New Hampshire, Russia
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Foreign Policy, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Sarah Palin | Comments Off on Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin