Posts Tagged ‘Stress Humor’
Wednesday, March 27th, 2013
Happy anniversary to the corkscrew! On March 27, 1860, New Yorker M.L. Byrn patented a corkscrew design. “It was T-shaped, based on gadgets that had long been used to extract bullets stuck in the muzzles of guns. Corkscrews had been around before Byrn’s invention, but his design became the standard in America for decades.”
Limerick Ode To The Corkscrew
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Make a toast to a corking invention–
An aid in removing our tension.
Does your life feel screwed up?
Need some sips with your sup?
Then give praise for the corkscrew’s ascension.
Tags: Alcoholic Poems, Drinking Limerick, Inventions Poem, M. L. Byrn, March Holidays, New York, Odd Holidays, Patent Humor, Stress Humor, Tension Humor, Wine Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Inventions Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | 19 Comments »
Tuesday, April 17th, 2012
Are you all ready for National Pet Owners Independence Day?
A gal who’d been cleaning was jarred
By some leaves just dragged in from her yard.
Displaying a broom,
She yelled, “Sweep up this room!”
To her dog. (Guess she’s working too hard.)
Tags: Animal & Pet Humor, Animal Verse, April Holidays, Backyard, Dog Verse, Dogs Humor, Household Chores, Household tools, Pet Owners, Pet Owners Independence Day, Spring Cleaning, Stress Humor
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Chores Humor, House & Home Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, April 4th, 2012
In-Box Overload (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My in-box is filled to the brim.
The sight of it’s making me grim.
And my virtual box
Is likewise a pox.
Mail has stamped out my zip and my vim.
(Prompted By One Single Impression’s “Inbox.”)
Related Post: Email Hell
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Email Humor, Energy Verse, In-Box, Mail Limerick, One Single Impression, Snail Mail Limerick, Stress Humor, Techno-Stress, Technology Verse
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor | 10 Comments »
Thursday, September 22nd, 2011
Regular readers know that Facebook’s News Ticker has been driving me mad! It’s also driven me to write three anti-Facebook limericks.
If you share my problem, or if you simply feel sorry for me, you’ll be pleased to know I’ve uncovered a solution: Google Chrome has an extension that makes Facebook’s annoying Ticker vanish.
I’ve installed it and the extension works great. No more News Ticker. Yippee!
Time to celebrate with a limerick:
No Longer Tickered Out
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My outlook is better today
Cuz I’ve sent Facebook’s Ticker away:
Yes, a cool Chrome extension
Does Ticker prevention.
To Google, big thanks and hooray!
Tags: Chrome Extensions, Computer Verse, Facebook Limerick, Google, News Feed, Scrolling, Social Media Poetry, Stress Humor, Technology Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Google, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, September 21st, 2011
I’ve been trying to find something good to say about Facebook’s new News Feed, and here it is: It’s very inspirational! Last night it inspired me to write this dizzy limerick. And now I’ve written two more:
If you like things that constantly flicker,
You’re sure to enjoy Facebook’s ticker.
As for me, I must flee:
My sore brain needs Chablis,
So I’m off for some Advil and liquor.
*****
I am not one to bitch and to bicker,
But I hate Facebook’s stupid new ticker.
It makes my brain ache!
How much more can I take?
Enough with the scrolling and flicker!
*****
(Here’s a fun post about limericks, where you can submit your own.)
UPDATE: Good news! I’ve found a solution to Facebook’s terrible News Ticker problem. You can read all about it here, including a celebratory limerick.
Tags: ADD Humor, Attention Deficit Humor, Computer Verse, Drinking Limerick, Facebook Limerick, Liquor Humor, News Feed, Scrolling, Social Media Poetry, Stress Humor, Technology Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 21 Comments »
Monday, April 25th, 2011
First off, this limerick (despite its name) has nothing to do with macaroni. I’m not suffering from Passover pasta-withdrawal. Nor do my dreams (or nightmares) ever feature anything of a noodle nature.
So why the title? I just learned, from the delightfully informative Miss Rumphius, about the rare and usually comic form called macaronic verse. What the heck is macaronic verse? We’re told that it’s a usually absurd and nonsensical “poem in a mixture of two languages, one of them preferably Latin,” and that “the poet usually subjects one language to the grammatical laws of another to make people laugh.”
So naturally I had to try it, mixing legal terms (mostly Latin) in with standard limerick English:
Macaronic Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The corpus is AWOL. Oh my!
I attest that I left it hereby.
What a bona fide mess.
My mentis has stress.
It’s de facto I mortemed that fly.
(Linked at We Write Poems pairings prompt.)
Tags: April Holidays, Insect and Bug Humor, Jewish Holidays, Law Humor, Legal Jargon, Legal Limerick, Light Verse, Macaronic Verse, Passover, Poetry Forms, Stress Humor
Posted in Holiday Humor, Insect Humor, Light Verse, Limericks, Macaronic Verse, Poetry Forms, Poetry Rules | 32 Comments »
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2011
The task at hand over at Three Word Wednesday is to write a poem using these three words: Figure, Juicy, and Stress. I enjoyed the mental exercise and wrote this limerick:
If Only Life Were That Simple
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When I’m feeling a bit under stress
And I figure my life’s in a mess,
If I read something juicy
Or play some Debussy,
My problems are quick to egress.
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Debussy, Juicy Novels, Mental Health, Music, Simple Life, Stress Humor, Three Word Wednesday
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Minimalist Humor, Poetry & Prompts | 10 Comments »
Friday, February 18th, 2011
Edgy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
His cash flow had put him on edge,
And he needed a day to just veg.
He was stressed to the max
Over real estate tax,
And could not even fund his new hedge.
(Lots Of Laughter edge prompt)
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Cash Flow Humor, Gardening Humor, Hedge Funds, Home Limerick, Money Verse, Real Estate, Stress Humor, Tax Poetry
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, House & Home Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Real Estate Humor, Tax & IRS Satire | 4 Comments »
Sunday, December 5th, 2010
Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A jittery fellow named Fred…
Here’s mine. (It’s a three-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)
Jittery Limerick (Jittery Limerick Audio)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A jittery fellow named Fred
Had problems with sleeping in bed.
He could sleep on a chair
Or a stool — anywhere
But in bed, where things came to a head.
He was haunted in bed by his fears,
Whether sober or after some beers.
He would worry and fret—
Could not snooze on a bet.
And that’s how he lived for ten years.
But then podcasts came into his life.
(He’d heard about them from his wife.)
The discussions and talk
Made sad thoughts take a walk.
Now he slumbers in bed without strife.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Insomnia Humor, Mental Health, Podcasts, Poetry & Prompts, Sleep Poetry, Stress Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 12 Comments »
Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010
Dear Press: Clean Up Your Own Damn Mess! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
We get headlines each March from the press:
“It’s Spring — Time To Clean Up Your Mess.”
Seems they’re too dumb to know
That we’re still getting snow.
Dear journos, stop giving me stress!
Related Post: Guilt Springs Eternal
Tags: House & Home, Household Chores, March Holidays, Media Limerick, Seasonal Verse, Spring Cleaning, Stress Humor, Weather Poem
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Chores Humor, House & Home Humor, Limericks, Media Humor, Seasons Humor, Weather Humor | 2 Comments »
Saturday, June 9th, 2007
I’ve been out of school for far longer than I care to admit. But I still have nightmares that go something like this:
School Daze (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I crammed for the test—studied madly.
But, alas, I’m afraid I did badly
Cause I choke under stress.
I go blank. I’m a mess!
Take a do-over test? Yes, please. Gladly!
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Blank Memory, Education & School Humor, Examinations, Exams, Mind Freeze, School Humor, Stress Humor, Tests
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Education & School Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor | 2 Comments »
Monday, May 14th, 2007
Do you work with anybody like this? I sure hope not!
Bandwidth Blues
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“I’ve no bandwidth for that,” some folks say.
It’s their style of responding, “No way!
I’ve no time. I am beat.
I have deadlines to meet.
I’m maxed out. I can’t help you. Okay?”
Tags: Anxiety Humor, Bandwidth, Deadlines, Maxed Out, Pressure, Stress Humor, Time Pressure, Workplace Tension
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Business Humor, Communication Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Satire, Time Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, August 22nd, 2006
Are you stressed out? A quivering blob of nerves? Are your muscles lodged in a permanent clench? Here’s what not to do:
1. Lie down on the floor with your knees bent and pointed upward. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and exhale slowly. Take another deep breath. Wonder if that smell is gas.
2. Concentrate on your breathing, on releasing that stale, toxic, virulent energy trapped inside you. Feel your body begin to relax. Sense the tension seeping out of your shoulders and toes, your life force beginning to renew. Jump up to check the stove.
3. Resume the position. Resume breathing. Become obsessed by cobwebs on the ceiling.
4. Decide to play a relaxation CD. Your choices are “healing harps,” ocean waves, and whales. Wonder which best suits your persona. Whales remind you of sharks. Decide to go with the harps.
5. Lie down a third time, notice ceiling, slam eyelids shut. Breathe deeply, welcoming the return of your vital juices. I.n.h.a.l.e…t.w.o…t.h.r.e.e…f.o.u.r…E.x.h.a.l.e…t.w.o…t.h.r.e.e…f.o.u.r. Savor the rise and fall of your abdomen. Focus on the harps which remind you of angels which remind you of heaven which reminds you of hell which reminds you that maybe you should listen to something else. … De-Stress Or Distress is continued here.)
UPDATE: August 15th is National Relaxation Day.
Tags: Aromatherapy Humor, August Holidays, Health & Medical Humor, Holistic Humor, How-To Humor, Meditation Humor, Mental Health, National Relaxation Day, New Age, New Age Humor, Relaxation Humor, Self-Help Humor, Stress Humor, Tension Humor
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, How-To Humor, Humor Columns & Humorous Essays, Mental Health Humor, New Age Humor, Self-Help Humor, Social Satire | 1 Comment »
