Said the coach to the batter, “The fray
That you started ain’t going away:
Remember the gurneys?
Those ‘fans’ got attorneys
Who’ve sued us for batt’ry today.”
Posts Tagged ‘Sports Humor’
The Fray (Limerick)
Saturday, May 18th, 2024Balls! (Limerick)
Friday, April 5th, 2024It is National Volleyball Day.
Will I celebrate? No! Never! Nay!
I’ve a life-long approach
To all balls that encroach:
Duck and hide, if one’s coming my way.
My Unathletic Career (Limerick)
Saturday, March 16th, 2024My endurance in gym class was poor.
I was slow, klutzy, small, and what’s more,
The mere sight of a ball
Made me duck. After all,
My two goals were “Break nothing! Don’t score!”
Mini-Golf Madness (Limerick)
Saturday, April 22nd, 2023Last weekend, we took a short stroll
To a mini-golf range — a fun goal,
Though I CAN’T aim at all;
Ended up with no ball,
Its location, alas, a black hole.
Unadventurous Limerick
Monday, March 13th, 2023An adventurous person? Hee-hee!
I’m a bit of a coward, you see.
So to physical risks,
I say “No!” All my discs
And my bones seem essential to me.
Sports-Challenged Limerick
Saturday, February 11th, 2023I am NOT up on sports — not at all,
Though I’m guessing most sports use a ball.
Many don’t? Goes to show
How little I know!
Please forgive me my terrible call!
An Age-Old Story (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 26th, 2022Although her great-uncle was old,
He still loved to play sports; he was bold
And he gave it his all
When he lunged for a ball.
He’d but ONE worry: Catching a cold!
Limerick Ode To The Eagles
Monday, January 10th, 2022“Save The Eagles Day” — that’s today’s brand.
It’s a national day in our land.
Lest there be some confusion
Or even delusion,
I don’t mean the team or the band.
(“Save The Eagles Day” is celebrated each year on January 10.)
Happy Golf Lovers Day! (October 4) (Limerick)
Monday, October 4th, 2021Though I’m no fan of golf, I couldn’t resist writing a Golf Lovers Day limerick:
As a golfer swigged beer in a pub,
He bitched and he gobbled his grub:
“I’ve been flubbing my putts.
Being drubbed drives me nuts!”
The response to that putz? “Join the club!”
Self-Assessment (Limerick)
Tuesday, July 27th, 2021At athletics I’m sorely pathetic.
I’m noetic; I guess it’s genetic.
Writing rhyme’s more my speed.
Lim’ricks rule! That’s my creed —
My addictive aesthetic poetic.
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: ICE at the end of any one line
Sunday, November 27th, 2016It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using ICE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SHOPPING, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SHOPPING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on December 11, 2016, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 10, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
I’m a klutz who used FIGURE skates twice.
Would I try again? Never! No dice!
I kept fretting I’d fall,
Hit the wall, and then sprawl,
As I skated on very thin ice.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Limerick Ode To Golf
Wednesday, May 18th, 2016Since it’s Golf Day, I thought I’d address
My embarrassing lack of finesse
Playing golf; Any game
That requires an aim
Leaves me minimal chance of success.
Limerick Ode To Bowling
Thursday, February 25th, 2016A woman who never had bowled
Married into that sport-loving fold.
Forced to play — what a pickle!
But luck is so fickle;
Once beleaguered, she’s relishing gold.
(February 25 is Go Bowling Day, and the second Saturday in August is National Bowling Day.)
Open Limerick to Super Bowl Fans
Sunday, February 7th, 2016If the game goes from boring to worse,
Don’t bother to sob or to curse.
Sublimation works well.
Be creative as hell:
Snap some photos, sketch, paint, or write verse.
PS: My latest Limerick-Off challenge has just begun. You can find it here.
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: ROE or THOREAU or ROW (which MUST use ROE Pronunciation) at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, August 1st, 2015It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using ROE or THOREAU or ROW (which MUST use ROE pronunciation) at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
My husband went out for a row–
Not a fight but a boat ride, although
I suppose while he works
Those oars, jet ski jerks
Could cause him to go toe to … tow.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Fair Game
Monday, April 6th, 2015Fair Game
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I would never purport
to engage in a sport
unless mockery counts;
I do massive amounts.
I make comments in sport
that make some people snort.
I’m unsporting, some claim,
When at pols I take aim.
But those pols are fair game.
Their behavior’s to blame,
And they reap what they sow.
So it’s on with the show.
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BEAM at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, March 21st, 2015It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using BEAM at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
The gymnast got high scores on beam,
But was hurled off the vault with a scream.
Seems some slippery foe
Had greased it — a blow
That pummeled the ranks of her team.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Sundry Super Bowl Verse
Sunday, February 1st, 2015I’ll be drinking at home,
but not watching the game.
My disint’rest in football
is largely to blame.
As for Mark, he’ll be here
mostly viewing the ads
And enjoying the half-time
like “Katy Cat” lads.
*****
If the Super Bowl’s boring or worse,
There’s no need to complain or to curse.
Let your rhyme juices flow
While you’re watching the show;
Write a lim’rick – take solace in verse.
The Role Of Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, February 17th, 2013It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman was playing a role…*
or
A fellow was playing a role…*
or
A woman was eating a roll….*
or
A fellow was eating a roll….*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
The Role of Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman was playing a role,
Pretending she golfed and could bowl.
But the sports-loving guy
She was out with could spy
And pin down her claim’s obvious hole.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
My Super Bowl 2013 Wrap-Up (Limerick)
Monday, February 4th, 2013My Super Bowl 2013 Wrap-Up (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Rumor has it, the game’s fin’ly ended,
Long delayed till the lighting was mended.
Someone lost. Someone won.
Watchers surely had fun.
As for me, my TV — unattended.
(Okay, this is technically a lie: My TV was attended by hubby Mark.)
