My damn email spam’s out of control!
My attempts at a fix? A black hole!
Unsubscribing with zeal
Simply proves that I’m REAL,
A great target — a gullible soul.
Posts Tagged ‘Spam Humor’
My Losing Battle With Spam (Limerick)
Saturday, May 11th, 2024Bot Attack (Limerick)
Thursday, February 22nd, 2024My poor stomach is tied up in knots,
Cuz I’m being assaulted by bots.
They are clogging both blogs,
Email’s gone to the dogs,
And I’m drowning in spam. (Hence the trots.)
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: PLOT at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: May 1, 2021)
Saturday, April 17th, 2021It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using PLOT at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DRONES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DRONE-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 2, 2021 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, May 1, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my PLOT-rhyme limerick:
A woman at work on a plot
For a book that she hoped would be hot,
Read an excerpt aloud
To a writers’ group crowd.
Someone scoffed: “Is the author a bot?”
And here’s my DRONE-themed Two-Verse limerick:
“I do NOT want to own a damn drone,
No matter how easily flown.
It’s the last thing I’d buy,
And I can’t fathom why
You keep spamming me. Leave me alone!“How I got on your list, I don’t know.
Was my email supplied by a foe?
May your sales and drones crash!
And here’s a hot flash:
Do NOT hold your breath for my dough!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Spammer Correspondence
Tuesday, October 9th, 2018Dear Nicco (or Flora; you appear confused about your name.)
Thanks for your email offering to “optimize” my site and fix its “technical errors.”
But since your missive begins “Hi Nicco,” (you’re also befuddled by MY name) I’m pretty sure you aren’t the Nicco/Flora for the job.
Captured By CAPTCHA
Monday, May 21st, 2007If you’ve ever registered for a site or an email list, you’re surely familiar with those frustrating anti-spam CAPTCHA forms. CAPTCHA, which is an acronym for “Completely Automated Public Turing test to tell Computers and Humans Apart,” generally does a really good job of blocking … me:
Captured By CAPTCHA (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The CAPTCHA form used on their site
Quickly conquered computerized blight,
Because bots can’t decode
Any image it showed.
But then neither can I—there’s my plight.
(You can find more of my technology humor here.)
A Spam Filter That Really Works Would Be Nice
Saturday, March 10th, 2007A Spam Filter That Really Works Would Be Nice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My filters should block them, but nay!
Spam emails beset me each day,
Pushing stock, naked boys,
Drugs for sex, naughty toys—
All ad nauseam. Please, go away!
