This summer’s weather in New York City, especially August, has been astonishingly pleasant. And then September hit.
I Knew It Couldn’t Last (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I was right with my weather suspicions;
We’ve reverted to dreadful conditions.
High humidity, heat,
Heavy T-storms compete,
As we weather their juxtapositions.
My Unreasonable Complaint (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m not hot. There’s no sweat on my brow.
I’m not cold. Yes, I’m forced to allow
That the last sev’ral days
Have had moderate rays.
So what will I bitch about now?
Sunny Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I confess that I’m really not one
To use sunscreen, but please don’t make fun.
My skin’s still protected;
The scheme I’ve selected
Is hide and stay out of the sun.
Happy Sun Screen Day! (May 27)
UPDATE: “Don’t Fry Day” falls on the Friday before Memorial Day.
In a recent Washington Post Style Invitational contest, we were challenged to invent and define weather-related terms. You can read the excellent winning entries here.
And here are my losing entries:
Snow-Brawl: Two arctic storms battle it out.
Frizzly: Just damp enough to frizz your hair.
Withering Heights: Too miserably hot out to leave the house.
Itticane: Gender neutral term for hurricane, favored by most feminists. (Some feminists prefer Himmicane.)
Bellweather: Sunny forecast.
Rain Cower: Hide from a storm, usually under storefront awnings.
Cold and Bothered (Quatrain)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I live in a town where it’s pleasant to stroll.
We do most of our errands on foot.
But it’s frightfully cold. “Let’s stay home,” I cajole.
Forget milk! Let’s be smart and stay put.
(January 11 is National Milk Day.)
Spring? You’re Kidding, Right? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Spring is legally set to begin,
Which in light of the weather’s a sin:
Last night we had snow,
Sleet, and ice here and so
There’s a seasonal mix-up herein.
Limerick Ode To Groundhog Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There’s an animal hogging the news
And casting a shadow on views.
It’s the groundhog, of course:
Our annual source
Of featherbrained seasonal clues.
Happy Groundhog Day! (February 2nd.) And for more groundhog poetry, visit DVerse Poets.
Weathering New York Weather
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The weather outside isn’t nice,
And the walks are all covered with ice.
I seem to recall
That it’s technic’ly fall.
Would I leave New York City? No dice!
(You can find more of my seasonal (and holiday) humor here and more of my New York humor here.)
There’s nothing quite like a tough mental challenge. And I sure had a good time with this one, prompting me to write something (in my case, a limerick) using these three words: phone, stumbled and windy.
The Joys Of Winter
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It was windy and snowy. I stumbled.
Then I fell and my keys and phone tumbled
And slid down the ice.
I yelled words not so nice.
“How rude!” an old passerby grumbled.
And speaking of winter, it’s almost time to start worrying about your office Christmas party.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
