I couldn’t resist using the new-to-me word “guttle” in a limerick. (It means “to eat or drink greedily and noisily.”)
Said a gal to her husband, “You guttle!”
She entreated him, “Try to be subtle
When drinking and chewing.
It’s rude what you’re doing!”
“Well at least I don’t fart!” — his rebuttal.
How NOT To Butter Up Your Waiter (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When given some butter — a dollop,
She said “More, and don’t loll! Hurry! Lollop!”
On the waiter’s return
With a butter-filled urn,
She threw the urn, earning a wallop.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal who looked young for her years…
Here’s mine:
Unassailable Logic
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal who looked young for her years
Was often assaulted by leers.
“That is rude,” pals opined,
But she said, “I don’t mind.
Soon enough they’ll replace them with jeers.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
What’s with prominent celebrities and pols whose last names begin with “W”? Joe Wilson, Kanye West, and Serena Williams have all made unspeakably rude public asses of themselves during the last few days. And so the worlds of politics, entertainment and sports have all come together in a sad celebration of awful behavior followed by inadequate apologies.
Here’s my limerick tribute to their unseemly public tirades:
Ode To Incivility
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Must pols and celebs be so rude?
And display a despicable ‘tude?
Misters Wilson and West
And Ms. Williams, it’s best
To attempt not to act so unglued.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
