Posts Tagged ‘Oboe Humor’

*****UPDATE: CURRENT LIMERICK-OFF DEADLINE EXTENDED INDEFINITELY***** (See Details Below in my May 29th Comment.) Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SLIP or SLIPPED at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: New Date TBA)

Saturday, May 4th, 2024

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SLIP or SLIPPED at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DECEIT, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DECEIT-related limerick.

And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.

Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
BOTTLE, DARK, GUITAR, RELEASE, SCOLD.

(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa, and use any other variant of the random words. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on June 2, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 1, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SLIP or SLIPPED-Rhyme Limerick:

The young oboist tried not to slip
While adjusting her reed; a small snip
Was essential — that’s all!
The reed cracked! Did she bawl?
No, she still kept a stiff upper lip.

And here’s my DECEIT-Themed Limerick:

You have taken advantage of me,
Yet again, said a gal to “pal” Leigh.
I’m feeling abused,
Betrayed and misused,
And I’m betting a court will agree.

You’ve frequently borrowed my spouse
To repair things that break in your house.
It appears that “repair”
Is code for “affair.”
How dare you have sex with that louse!

And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:

Do not bottle up feelings, we’re told,
But that sort of advice leaves me cold.
Were my feelings released
I’d turn into a beast;
An express-it-all, ornery scold.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Why I Write Limericks (Limerick)

Saturday, October 9th, 2021

Writing lim’ricks meets some of my needs:
To create, vent my spleen, avoid screeds.
Written wordplay’s a ball!
And the best part of all?
It doesn’t entail making reeds.

When It Comes To Knives, I’m Not The Sharpest Tool (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 24th, 2021

Some people shouldn’t be trusted with knives… and I’m one of them.

Happy National Knife Day. (August 24)

For decades I wrangled with cane;
Cutting, carving, and whittling — my bane.
Wielding knives in my hands
As the oboe demands,
I made reeds — time (and blood) down the drain.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SCREEN at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: July 13, 2019)

Saturday, June 29th, 2019

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SCREEN at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WIND INSTUMENTS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WIND-INSTRUMENT-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on July 14, 2019, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 13, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SCREEN-rhyme limerick, which happens to be an acrostic limerick:

She is tiny; at barely five feet,
Her heels swing from a normal-sized seat.
Oh those movies, unseen;
Rangy men block the screen.
Theater’s hopeless; home-viewing is sweet.

And here’s my WIND-INSTRUMENT-themed limerick, which is also an acrostic limerick:

Oh the sound of the oboe is great,
But the reed making makes me irate.
Often reeds that seem fine
End up trashed. (Most of mine!)
So I envy the flute player’s fate.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: STICK at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5 (Deadline: April 18)

Saturday, April 4th, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using STICK at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner on April 19, right before I post the next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 18 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

The conductor was wielding his stick,
While screaming: “The strings are too quick,
And the woodwinds are slow.”
This made double reeds blow;
Yelled the oboe, “You don’t know a lick!”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Musical Haiku Quintet

Saturday, February 26th, 2011

String quartet concert
missing one violinist—
time to improvise.

*****

Cruising musician
garners Carnegie Hall gig—
fantasy at sea.

*****

Distracted jazzer
misplaces his melodies—
loses audience.

****

Clueless conductor
hurls baton at oboist—
finally a cue.

*****

Billy Joel said:
We Didn’t Start The Fire.
Maybe we need to.

*****

(My first and third haiku were inspired by The Writer’s Island improvise prompt. My second haiku was inspired by Haiku Wednesday’s fantasy prompt. My late addition 5th haiku was inspired by Sunday Scribblings’ fire prompt.)

Limerick Ode To Ted Alexandro

Sunday, February 14th, 2010

As I’ve mentioned previously, Comix is one of my favorite New York City comedy clubs. And it sure didn’t disappoint Friday night when we saw the hilarious Ted Alexandro and “Friends” Pete Dominick, Joe Derosa, and Morgan Murphy.

Headliner Alexandro, a former elementary school music teacher, was the highlight of the evening. I love his comic sensibility, his pacing and his fearless use of silence. But hubby Mark and I also enjoyed the other comedians, especially Morgan Murphy, who somehow manages to sound both depressed and funny at the same time.

Getting back to Alexandro, in one segment of his routine Alexandro waxes funny about teaching little kids the recorder (presumably the children’s version, known as a flutophone.)

This comedy bit inspired me (an oboe performance major who once taught the oboe) to write a limerick in honor of Alexandro’s transition from music teacher to standup comic:

Limerick Ode To Ted Alexandro
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A funny young fellow named Ted,
Who majored in musical ed,
Taught kiddies recorduh.
An instrument? Sorta.
But now he’s a comic, instead.

UPDATE: Ted Alexandro inspired me to write him another limerick when he joined the Wall Street protests.

Give Me An “A!” (Limerick)

Saturday, November 25th, 2006

Give Me An “A!”
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When symphony instruments tune,
They’re not matching the flute or bassoon;
It’s the first oboe’s “A”
That the strings must obey.
If they don’t, be prepared for High Noon.

On a more serious … uh … note, here’s some info that might make this limerick a bit more meaningful to some of you: Symphony orchestras tune to the first oboist, who generally gives his fellow musicians an A-440. Many string players prefer a slightly sharper pitch, an A-442 or A-444, believing that it gives their sound a more desirable brightness. This can lead to lots of bickering.

You can find more of my music related humor here.