An athlete ran nude down the street
And was caught by the cops — no mean feat.
He explained (all erect)
“‘Twas a test to detect
If detectives on foot can be fleet.”
Posts Tagged ‘Nudity’
An Athletic Test (Limerick)
Monday, November 13th, 2023I Won’t Be Celebrating “Naked Bike Ride Day” (Limerick)
Saturday, June 11th, 2022Riding bikes while you’re naked sounds odd,
No matter the shape of your bod.
If you’re nude and ride past,
Kindly pedal by fast.
And do NOT expect ME to applaud!
(World Naked Bike Ride Day is celebrated each year on the second Saturday of June.)
Happy World Naked Gardening Day (1st Saturday of May)
Friday, May 1st, 2015Happy World Naked Gardening Day (1st Saturday of May)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Naked Gardening Day is tomorrow.
As I write this, I shudder with sorrow.
So I strongly advise:
Stay indoors, avert eyes…
Or give gard’ners some clothes they can borrow.
Light Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, November 16th, 2014It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man who liked traveling light…*
or
A criminal plot came to light…*
or
A woman stopped short at a light…*
or
The snow was supposed to be light…*
or
My husband was out like a light…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Light Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman liked traveling light,
No matter how distant her flight,
Often visiting nudists–
“No clothes” absolutists–
Who took naked delight in their rite.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Foul Limerick
Friday, September 5th, 2014Foul Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man in a very foul mood
Had caught his new wife with some dude —
A handsome young guy.
Her response, when asked why:
“He looks better than you in the nude.”
Limerick Ware (Limerick-off Monday)
Saturday, March 29th, 2014It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
While shopping for fantasy-wear…*
or
A woman appeared unaware…*
or
My break pads have suffered some wear…*
or
I would never buy ready-to-wear…*
or
My wife disappeared — don’t know where…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Ware
By Madeleine Begun Kane
How I wish I could choose what to wear
Without worries that people might stare.
‘Twould be lovely to skirt
The whole issue (no shirt,
Dress, or leggings) and simply go bare.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Chutzpah Laid Bare (Limerick)
Thursday, August 29th, 2013Chutzpah Laid Bare (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal who had chutzpah to spare
Liked to circle her town wholly bare.
“It’s not me you should stop,”
She’d respond to a cop,
“But that pusher. Consider us square.”
Limerick Ode To Olympic Beach Volleyball
Monday, July 30th, 2012Limerick Ode To Olympic Beach Volleyball
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Watch those barely clad women play ball
On the beach, keeping viewers in thrall,
Gals hoping to volley
Olympic wins. Golly!
I’m surprised they wear clothing at all.
Nude Yoga? Yikes! (Limerick)
Thursday, March 29th, 2012Yoga’s been in the news quite a bit lately. Is it good for you? Is it bad for you? Should you purchase some fancy yoga garb and skip the actual yoga?
But the oddest story so far is this one about naked yoga classes in South Park Slope, Brooklyn, New York.
Nude Yoga? Yikes!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Take a yoga class naked? How scary!
I confess that the thought makes me wary.
Yes I’ll gladly condone
Nude yoga alone.
But in public? I’m sorry. Too hairy.
(If you’re in Brooklyn and want to study yoga in a more modest fashion, check out my niece’s Crown Heights Fitness.)
Related Posts: A Fountain Of Face-Yoga Youth? and Yoga For What?
Brooding Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, March 18th, 2012It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman who tended to brood…*
or
A fellow who tended to brood…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Brooding Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman who tended to brood
Was spotted outdoors in the nude.
“I’d forgotten to dress,”
She explained to the press,
Who depressed her by calling her “dude.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Flaring Verse (Limerick and Haiku)
Tuesday, October 4th, 2011Jenn’s haiku theme this week is flare. So I decided to have some homonym fun, writing a flair limerick and a flare haiku:
A woman who dressed with much flair,
Wearing clothes I for one would not dare,
One morning looked odd—
Neither stylish, nor mod—
Alas, she was utterly bare.
*****
When bad tempers flare,
they tend to bare* grievances
best left buried.
*****
*In my haiku, I changed bear to bare after my husband Mark pointed out my error. Since I’m always pointing out his errors, Mark really enjoyed this. :)
Looking Askance (Limerick)
Thursday, July 28th, 2011Looking Askance (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman was looking askance
At a hoofer she spotted by chance.
He danced by the book.
So why the odd look?
The fellow was wearing no pants.
UPDATE: Happy International Dance Day! (April 29th)
Naked Pleasures
Wednesday, December 15th, 2010If you’re reading this, you probably enjoy limerick challenges. So I wanted to make sure you knew about Patrick McGuire’s weekly Unfinished Limerick Contests.
Essentially, Patrick provides part of a limerick — anywhere from two to four lines — and asks you to finish it. And he even declares an actual winner.
They’re lots of fun, and I’m pleased to report that I just won his 24th contest. In that poetry challenge, Patrick provided the first two lines and I added the last three. Here’s the resulting limerick:
I am not really much of a prude
And on other folks’ joys don’t intrude.
No, I’d never play god,
But this one thing seems odd:
Why do folks with bad bods sunbathe nude?
UPDATE: I’m guessing these people have an extra good time on National Nude Day, celebrated each year on July 14th.
Strategic Verse
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009Agency Ode
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was an agent, quite tough,
Who cut all his deals in the buff.
When his clients asked why,
He would give this reply:
“When I’m nude, no one dares give me guff.”
Feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, please join my friends in that same activity in my limerick-offs.
