A man whose deep pockets are boundless
Is hounded by lawsuits, most groundless.
Take the latest; a claim
About dog-bites, whose aim
Is big bucks, but the “dog owner’s” hound-less.
Posts Tagged ‘Money Limericks’
A Dog Of A Claim (Limerick)
Wednesday, September 1st, 2021Money Limerick Contest Results – And The Winners Are…
Thursday, June 28th, 2007Thanks to all of you who participated in this, my third limerick writing contest. (And yes, I’ll be running another contest later this summer.) Once again, your enthusiasm and creativity has made this a fun experience for me and, I hope, for you.
The response to my money-related limerick writing contest exceeded my wildest hopes and set a new record – 94 limericks were submitted. And the overall quality of the entries was very impressive — so impressive, that I’ve decided to expand the prize money pool enough to award an extra prize.
And speaking of prizes, I’m awarding a First Prize ($25 in PayPal cash), a Second Prize ($15 in PayPal cash), a Third Prize ($10 in PayPal cash), and six Honorable Mentions. And the winners are…
FIRST PRIZE goes to Max Gutmann (author of There Was a Young Girl from Verona: A Limerick Cycle Based on the Complete Dramatic Works of Shakespeare) for a limerick that made me laugh out loud, no matter how many times I re-read it:
Can the money you’ve got be called loot?
Here’s a test: did a guy in a suit
Grunt “Da big guy sez T’anks”?
Did you “find” it in banks?
Did a lady say, “Take it, don’t shoot”?
SECOND PRIZE goes to Shawn McBurnie for this very amusing (and all too true) limerick:
Let me tell you, it’s not what you know.
I work hard, but I’ve reached a plateau.
I’ve a dozen degrees,
Which astounds the trustees—
Would you like that for here or to go?
THIRD PRIZE goes to mephistopheles for this funny limerick:
A drunk who was drowning his sorrow
Had requested some cash he could borrow,
And polite as can be,
Bowed and thanked both of me,
And avouched he’d repay us tomorrow.
And six HONORABLE MENTIONS go to (listed in submission order):
Jesse Frankovich:
The more of my money I bet,
The more in return I shall net!
But, of course, should I lose,
I’ll be singing the blues
As each bet, I regret, becomes debt.
Chris Young:
There’s a dieting guru called Valerie
Who garners the healthiest salary.
Her food range (extensive)
Is so darn expensive,
It works out as £10 per calorie.
Stephen Gold:
This accrued lunch expense is so high…
Do you think that your limit’s the sky?
To the counters of beans
All your bean-feasting means
It’s a fine time to bid you goodbye.
Chris Doyle:
A Switzerland bank says I’ll earn
All the interest with little concern
That the Feds can acquire
The date of my wire,
So soon I’ll have money to Bern.
Doug Harris:
“Being rich = happy”. Not I!
My disposable income’s run dry.
Some say that great wealth
Is just bad for your health
Maybe so, but I’d give it a try!
Rebecca Zugor:
My credit card spending is vast –
Not sure how much longer I’ll last.
To help pay these bills
Leave me lots in your wills.
I need cash in a flash, please die fast!
Congratulations to all the winners, and thanks again to everybody who participated. (You can read all of the entries right here.)
And please stay tuned — I’ll be announcing another limerick contest very soon right here in this blog. And if you have any contest topic suggestions, feel free to post them in a comment to this post.
Limerick Writing Contest With Money Prizes … and the Topic Is…
Tuesday, June 12th, 2007If you’ve followed my previous limerick contests, you know that it’s just about time for another one.
So here’s my challenge: Write a money-related limerick (earning it, spending it, saving it, investing it, winning it, wasting it, being taxed on it, etc.) and post it here in a comment to this post, no later than Wednesday, June 27, 2007. (You may enter as many limericks as you’d like.) I’ll announce the winners on Thursday, June 28, 2007.
The first prize will be $25. The second prize will be $10. Both prizes will be paid via PayPal.
So, what exactly is a limerick? It’s a five line poem with an AABBA rhyme scheme and a very specific meter exemplified by these winning entries. (For more information about limericks check out these fine sites: Encyclospeedia Oedilfica and OEDILF.)
I’m looking forward to reading your entries!
Update: This contest is now closed, and the names of the winners and their winning entries are here. Thanks so much for your many excellent submissions.
