Posts Tagged ‘Marriage Limerick’
Friday, August 5th, 2022
When a gal switched her major to art,
Her parents’ responses were tart:
“Paying bills is a bitch,
So you’d best marry rich.”
“Are you planning to clerk at the mart?”
Tags: Art Humor, Art Limerick, Career Humor, Career Limerick, Education & School Humor, Education Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Money & Finance Humor, Money Limerick, Parenting Humor, Parenting Limerick
Posted in Art Humor / Verse, Education & School Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 1 Comment »
Sunday, July 31st, 2022
When I starting drafting this limerick, I meant it to be a National Mutt Day verse. But it seems to have turned into something else:
I had many a mutt growing up.
My fav’rite behaved like a pup
Well into old age.
And my husband, who’s sage,
Takes his lead from that dog. Clever? Yup!
Tags: Aging Humor & Verse, Aging Limerick, Animal & Pet Humor, December Holidays, Dog Humor, Dog Verse, Husband Humor, Husband Limerick, July Holidays, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Marriage Verse, Mutt Day, Mutts Humor, National Mutt Day, Odd Holidays
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Animal & Pet Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Mutt Memories (Limerick)
Saturday, July 9th, 2022
Happy birthday, dear hubby! Have fun!
You’re the best husband under the sun!
And PLEASE don’t feel stiffed,
But this lim’rick’s my gift.
(Aren’t you happy you wed a “Begun?”)
Tags: Birthday Humor, Birthday Limerick, Mark Kane, Marriage Limerick, Personal Humor
Posted in Birthday Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Personal | Comments Off on Happy Birthday To My Great Husband Mark (Limerick)
Thursday, June 9th, 2022
“My niece Mary’s a likeable lass
Who, alas, is engaged to an ass.
Though I’ve warned her, ‘Be wary,’
She’s anxious to marry.
What I need is a ‘Hail Mary pass.'”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Engagement Humor, Engagement Limerick, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Limerick, Hail Mary Pass, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Dating Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, April 27th, 2022
The aptly named newlywed, Dick,
Refers to his bride as a “chick”
And never extols her.
He boasts he “controls her”
By using “both carat and stick.”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor, Relationship Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on A Dickish Limerick
Sunday, April 24th, 2022
He showed off his coat with a swagger:
“It’s a one-of-a-kind,” said the bragger.
Then he brandished a knife:
“I’ll use THIS on the wife!”
His behavior? Sub-par cloak-and-dagger.
Tags: Braggart Verse, Bragging Humor, Bragging Limerick, Cloak And Dagger, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Coat Humor, Coat Limerick, Idioms Humor, Idioms Limerick, Knife Humor, Knife Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Weapons Humor, Weapons Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Idiom Humor, Marriage Humor, Weapons Humor | Comments Off on Cloaked In Bravado (Limerick)
Thursday, April 21st, 2022
“I don’t mind that my new husband hoards
His numerous fencing awards.
But his weapon collection
Incites my objection…
And that’s where we often cross swords.”
Tags: Awards Humor, Awards Limerick, Battle of the Sexes, Fencing Humor, Fencing Limerick, Hoarding Humor, Hoarding Limerick, Idioms Humor, Idioms Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Swords Humor, Swords Limerick, Weapons Humor, Weapons Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on NOT On The Fence (Limerick)
Saturday, April 16th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using WASTE or WAIST at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to COMMUNICATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best COMMUNICATION-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 1, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 30, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my WASTE or WAIST-rhyme limerick:
Said a fellow, “Alas and alack,
My new pants are too tight in the back
And the front of the waist.
(They were ordered in haste.)
I need someone to cut me some slack.”
And here’s my COMMUNICATION-themed limerick:
Dear hubby, you’re right in the kitchen,
And I’m elsewhere, so though you are itchin’
To share rumors or views,
A complaint or the blues,
I can NOT hear your news, schmooze, or bitchin’.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alterations Humor, Clothing Humor, Communication Humor, Communication Limerick, Competition Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Pants Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Slacks Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Communication Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 157 Comments »
Monday, January 31st, 2022
Though he’s brilliant, my husband can’t spell.
And his less/fewer usage? Pell-mell!
But despite his word-hurdle,
He beats me at Wordle…
And kvells as I yell, “What fresh hell!”
Tags: Language Humor, Language Humour, Language Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Puzzles Humor, Puzzles Limerick, Spelling Humor, Word Games, Word Usage Humor, Wordle
Posted in Games Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on Yet Another Wordle Limerick
Wednesday, January 26th, 2022
Two newly-wed gymnasts were sacked
And told it was time to get packed:
“Since the pair of you wed,
You are always in bed.”
Their defense? “Life’s a balancing act.”
Tags: Balancing Act, Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Employment Humor, Gym Humor, Gym Limerick, Gymnast Humor, Gymnast Limerick, Gymnastics, Gymnastics Humor, Gymnastics Limerick, Job Humor, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Sports Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Gymnastics
Saturday, January 22nd, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using PRIME at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to ACCUSATIONS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best ACCUSATIONS-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on February 6 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 5, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my PRIME-rhyme limerick:
A dishonest young fellow named Lance
Stole some wallets and handbags in France.
Though his theft skills were prime,
(This was not his first crime)
Lance was caught quite by chance at a dance.
And here’s my ACCUSATION-themed limerick:
A tense spouse warned her husband, “No joke!
You must give up cigars, or you’ll croak.”
He replied with a shriek:
“But I stopped just last week.”
“You’re lying,” she said. “Don’t blow smoke.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Accusations Humor, Accusations Limerick, Cigars, Competition Limerick, Crime & Punishment Humor, Crime Limerick, Lies Humor, Lies Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Lying, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Smoking Humor, Smoking Limerick, Theft Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Smoking Humor | 211 Comments »
Saturday, December 18th, 2021
This limerick would, alas, be timely, even if today (December 18) weren’t “World Knot Tying Day.”
A woman was tied up in knots
Over Covid. She feared for her tots.
Said her husband, “No vax!
I’d rather eat wax!”
In their fam’ly, the dolt calls the shots.
Tags: Covid Humor, Covid Limerick, December Holidays, Health & Medical Humor, Health Limerick, Knots Humor, Knots Limerick, Knotting Tying Day, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Odd Holidays
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Tied Up In Knots (Limerick)
Tuesday, November 30th, 2021
“Though it’s fine that my boyfriend is naughty,
A bit bossy and bad-ass and dotty,
His obsession with bots
Has me tied up in knots.
So I can’t tie the knot with that hottie.”
Tags: Bad Behavior, Battle of the Sexes, Bot Humor, Bot Limerick, Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Technology Humor, Technology Limerick, Tying The Knot
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Computer Humor, Dating Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Technology Humor | Comments Off on A Knotty Issue (Limerick)
Saturday, November 20th, 2021
“Wet clothes in the hamper? That’s foul!”
Said a gal to her spouse, with a scowl.
“What is wrong with you men!?
If you do it again,
I’ll divorce you and throw in the towel.”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Clothes Humor, Clothes Limerick, Clothing Limerick, Cothing Humor, Divorce Humor, Divorce Limerick, Hamper Humor, Hamper Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Laundry Humor, Laundry Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor, Relationship Limerick, Relatives Humor, Relatives Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Clothing Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on A Hampered Relationship (Limerick)
Sunday, November 14th, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using Cruise or Crews or Cruse at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to Retirement, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best Retirement-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on November 28, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, November 27, 2021, at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CRUISE or CREWS or CRUSE-rhyme limerick:
My muse often gives me the blues.
When I ask her for help, she’ll refuse.
She’ll mock me and roast me
And frequently ghost me.
She’s AWOL right now — on a cruise.
And here’s my RETIREMENT-themed limerick:
“It is best to acknowledge the truth
And retire; you’re way past your youth,”
Said a gal to her spouse,
Who’s a dentist. “Don’t grouse!
Just face facts: You are long in the tooth.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Age Verse, Aging, Aging Limerick, Aging Verse, Competition Limerick, Creative Limerick, Creativity Humor, Dentist Humor, Dentist Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Muse Humor, Muse Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Retirement Humor, Retirement Limerick, Tooth Humor, Writer's Block, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Creativity Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Writing & Publishing Humor | 173 Comments »
Thursday, October 14th, 2021
Happy “National Dessert Day.” (October 14)
A fellow was eating dessert.
Offered seconds, he said, “It can’t hurt.”
But his wife said, “Enough!”
“You used to be buff.”
He responded, “You used to be pert.”
Tags: Dessert Day, Dessert Humor, Dessert Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Marriage Verse, National Dessert Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Tasty Limerick
Friday, October 1st, 2021
Although I share this woman’s fondness for cold sake, this limerick ISN’T about me. (Happy Sake Day!)
“No wonder our marriage was rocky;
All my ex does is eat and watch hockey.
And the chip on his shoulder
Is big as a boulder…
Plus Milwaukee has lousy cold sake.”
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Alcohol Verse, Cold Sake, Divorce Humor, Divorce Limerick, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Liquor Humor, Liquor Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sake, Sake Day, Sake Humor, Sake Limerick, World Sake Day
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on For Heaven Sakes, Celebrate “Sake Day!” (Oct. 1) (Limerick)
Saturday, September 25th, 2021
“It’s easy to hoodwink that stinker,”
Said a man of his wife, a big drinker.
“When coition’s my mission,
She thinks I’m out fishin’…
And falls for it hook, line, and sinker.”
Tags: Battle of Sexes, Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Dishonesty, Fish Humor, Fish Limerick, Fishing Humor, Fishing Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Wordplay Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Marriage Humor, Wordplay | Comments Off on Fishing For An Alibi (Limerick)
Thursday, August 5th, 2021
Mark’s retired. Congrats! He’s now free
To play twenty-four-seven with ME.
But one question: Just when
Is my down time to pen
Silly lim’ricks? (I might have to flee.)
Tags: Employment Humor, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Retirement Humor, Retirement Limerick, Time Humor, Time Limerick, Workplace & Career Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Time Humor, Workplace & Career Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | Comments Off on Retirement Quandary (Limerick)
Saturday, June 12th, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using QUEST or REQUEST or BEQUEST at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TIMING, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TIMING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 27, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 26, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my QUEST or REQUEST or BEQUEST-rhyme two-verse limerick:
A man was consumed and obsessed
With his passionate study of EST.
He threatened divorce
In order to force
His spouse to embrace the same quest.
His wife in response said, “You’re mad!
And that fad’s turned you into a cad.
It’s controlling your mind.
We’re no longer aligned.
Quit that cult, or I’ll marry your dad.”
And here’s my TIMING-themed limerick:
A pianist who hailed from Venango
Was teaching while munching a mango.
“Your timing is off,”
She said with a scoff:
“It’s a waltz in 3/8; NOT a tango!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Cult Humor, Divorce Humor, Divorce Limerick, EST, EST Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marital Relationships, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Meter Humor, Mind Control Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Music Teacher Humor, Obsession Verse, Pianist Humor, Pianist Limerick, Pianists, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Rhythm Humor, Tango Humor, Tango Limerick, Timing Humor, Timing Limerick, Waltz Humor, Waltz Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Education & School Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Mental Health Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 181 Comments »
