As a retired lawyer, I move to quash the idea that “quash” is endangered:
Some fear that the verb known as “quash”
Has of late been supplanted by “squash.”
But lawyers still use it.
(Some even abuse it.)
In courtrooms “quash” still has panache.
(I wrote this in response to a discussion in the “A Way With Words” Facebook group about whether “squash” had largely replaced the word “quash.”)
Whether online or off, I hate brabbling;
Petty arguments, overwrought babbling.
But the worst verbal brawl —
The most irksome of all —
Tends to stem from political dabbling.
Why am I first learning the word “Parnassian?” Oh well … better late than never.
I felt like a dolt and turned ashen
On belatedly learning “Parnassian”
Can mean poem-related.
My ego’s deflated…
But I’ll keep penning lim’ricks with passion.
In the course of my constant perusal
Of email, I learned a word: “foozle.”
Though I’ve read it means “bungle,”
My mind is a jungle.
So recall it long-term? Brain refusal!
*********
NOTE: No doubt limerick experts are tempted to tell me that Foozle and Refusal don’t rhyme because Refusal has an F at the beginning of the 2nd syllable. However, I’d argue that Refusal is pronounced like “Re fyou sal” or “Ref you sal” and therefore sounds different enough to be a rhyme.
“Two” is larger than one; less than three.
“Too” replaces your “also” with glee.
“Too” means “overly” too.
It’s too much? I’m not through!
Go to “to” to be done … and you’re free.
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SOLE or SOUL at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WEAPONS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WEAPON-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on July 5, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 4, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SOLE/SOUL-rhyme limerick:
When I ordered a French Dover sole,
My fish-dish arrived in a bowl.
“What’s THIS? Why no PLATE?”
I shouted, irate.
(My new rating is “Dinnerware Troll.”)
And here’s my WEAPONS-themed limerick:
What’s my weapon of choice? It is words.
Guns and rifles and knives? For the birds!
Kill or maim? Not my aim.
(Please don’t make me shoot game!)
I’m just one of those bookwormy nerds.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
I just stumbled onto the new-to-me word FRATER: the dining room or refectory of a monastery. (Yes, I should have known it from “fraternal,” but I didn’t.) And as soon as I realized it’s a homophone type homonym of FREIGHTER, I felt compelled to write a limerick:
Don’t confuse the word “freighter” with “frater.”
One transports you; the latter will cater
To cuisine-needs monastic.
(I doubt it takes plastic.)
I’ll postpone further lessons for later.
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using NOTE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to GRAMMAR, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best GRAMMAR-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 29, 2019 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. (Due to my travel schedule you’ll have one extra week to submit your clever, polished verse.) Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 28, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my NOTE-rhyme limerick:
A man who was singing by rote
Kept hitting an out of tune note.
But nobody cared;
Instead, they just stared.
He was cute, which “earned” everyone’s vote.
And here’s my GRAMMAR-themed limerick:
A woman encountered an ad
Whose grammar was markedly bad.
So she dashed off a note
To the sponsor and wrote:
“Are you even a middle school grad?”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Thanks to Dictionary.com for inspiring this “eye-minded” limerick:
My husband Mark tends to be eye-minded.
As for me, I’m more aural and rhyme-minded.
While Mark will observe
Most sightings with verve,
I don’t, unless helpfully “high”-minded.
JOMO is Dictionary.com’s Word of the Day, which prompted this acronym rant:
I’m annoyed by the acronym FOMO,
As well as its opposite, JOMO.
“Missing out” is MO’s meaning.
FO’s “fear.” Are you gleaning
That JO connotes “joy?” Kindly, NOMO!
(NOMO means “no more.”)
Dictionary.com celebrated Tax Day today with this new-to-me word: Gabelle.
1 a tax; excise.
2 French History. a tax on salt, abolished in 1790.
Payers never respond with a smile
To taxes, which anger and rile.
Salty words greet gabelles;
Taxing salt rarely sells,
And in France it has gone out of style.
With language I’ve never been fickle,
But when told that I frequently stickle,
As I fight over usage
And language-abusage,
I’ll deny it as any tough chick’ll.
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CAN at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to GIFT-GIVING, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best GIFT-GIVING related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 27, 2018, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, May 26, 2018 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
People often mix “can” up with “may,”
Never knowing which one they should say.
“Yes, you may?” “Yes, you can?”
Why not can it and ban
Their distinctions? The sticklers say “Nay!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
It’s Gibberish Day, which seems silly;
Throwing language around willy-nilly
Doesn’t make any sense
And it’s sickening. Hence,
Of such talk I’m constrained to speak illy.
Dear Interviewees: Kindly stop using the word “so” at the beginning of your answers to questions.
Q: “Why do folks start their answers with ‘So…'”?
A: “So I guess that they use it for flow.”
Q: “Don’t they know that it’s wrong?”
A: “So their habit’s so strong,
They believe that they sound ‘in the know.'”
My hunger for words is voracious,
And I’ve just learned a new one: “fugacious.”
It means “fleeting,” I’ve read,
But it soon will have fled
From a brain insufficiently spacious.
A Slate language column by Katy Waldman has me re-thinking my anti-antimeria stance. (Antimeria is a “rhetorical device that repurposes a word as a different part of speech than usual.”)
Her column makes some solid points about antimeria’s advantages. In fact, the device may even prove to be handy for humor writing.
Katy’s viewpoint may generate frowns:
Turning nouns into verbs, verbs to nouns
Is extolled by that writer.
Though some may indict ’er,
The thought ain’t as bad as it soun’s.
It’s National Dictionary Day, created in honor of Noah Webster’s birthday.
I attempt to learn new words each day–
At least one, sometimes two, but they stray;
Seems as new words are learned,
The old ones are spurned:
“You’re evicted!” those brain-hoggers bray.
The word “sanction” is terribly flawed
Cuz its usage goes well beyond broad.
If you say that my act
Has been sanctioned, redact:
Did you penalize me, or applaud?
Oy Vey Iz Mir!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The gist of the Yiddish “oy vey”
Is nothing like “hip hip hooray.”
At times it is mere
Annoyance that’s here,
And at other times utter dismay.
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
