It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to DAVID MCCORMICK a/k/a AdamantYves who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever verse:
A woman was telling a tale
Of a date with a flesh-grabbing male:
‘Told him, “You with the paws!
“Don’t go thinking because
“This date’s ‘blind’ it’s okay to use Braille!”
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Robert Basler, Bruce Niedt, Emily a/k/a Looking For Roots, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Ira Bloom, Robert Schechter, and Ruth Henson Feder. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Robert Basler:
A fellow was telling a tale
On his big application to Yale:
He had biked across France,
Taught the lame how to dance,
And drunk rum from the real Holy Grail.
Bruce Niedt:
A fellow was telling a tale
Of a wolf bite he got on the trail.
“I’ll feel much better soon —
Hey, is that the full moon?”
Now he’s growing a snout and a tail.
Emily a/k/a Looking For Roots:
A fellow was telling a tale,
But the plot had the pace of a snail.
His friends all walked out,
And he started to pout
‘Cuz his whale of a tale was a fail.
Jane Shelton Hoffman:
A woman was telling a tale
Of the crowds at an underwear sale.
She pushed, shoved, and hit
Just for one bra that fit
And emerged much more perky, but pale.
Ira Bloom:
A fellow was telling a tale,
Of a harlot he’d chanced to impale:
“I had this erection;
Alas! No protection!
Next I knew, I was lifting her veil.”
Robert Schechter:
A fellow was telling a tale
Which he tried hard to peddle. No sale,
For the folks in his state
Learned he’d gone on a date
Though he’d claimed he’d been hiking a trail.
Ruth Henson Feder:
A woman was telling a tale
‘Bout a piss-poor excuse for a male
Who was three hours late
On their very first date,
Stiffed the bill, and was thrown into jail.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
