Halloween week I sampled some candy,
But stuff that I used to find dandy
Made me cringe with distaste.
Has aging laid waste
To my taste buds? I’d rather drink brandy.
Have the folks who make chocolate treats
Altered recipes, cheapened these sweets
Till they taste like debris?
Is it them? Is it me?
Either way, here come healthier eats.
Halloween, when the teens come around,
They will surely be sugar-high bound.
Will they scarf up their treats
While they’re combing the streets?
Yes they’ll feast as the pavement they pound.
Here’s a creepy Halloween-related survey:
More than half (53%) of parents of trick-or-treaters say their children between the ages of 4 and 10 would prefer cash over candy or even toys, according to a survey of 1,747 parents who celebrated Halloween carried out by coupon- and discount-code website Vouchercloud.net.
Trick-Or-Treating Goes Green? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
To you kids who want Halloween cash,
And not candy, your hopes I must dash.
If you ask me for money
Dear girly or sonny,
I’ll double the other kid’s stash.
Since Halloween is almost here, I’m offering you an alternative: You may write a limerick related to Halloween, using any first line. Next week I’ll present an extra award — one for the best Halloween limerick.
And now, getting back to my regular Sunday challenge: It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man who was driving a truck…*
or
A woman was planning to truck…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Truck Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man who was driving a truck
Got stuck in some very deep muck.
Then he ran out of gas,
Slipped and fell on his ass.
Seems that fellow was flat out of luck.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Though schools remain closed,
trick-or-treat stash is untouched:
Halloween Sandy.
*****
Hurricane Sandy
sure outpaces Halloween
in sheer spookiness.
Here’s an oddball byproduct of global warming: New York State Park officials reopened Long Island beaches for swimming this Columbus Day weekend because of unseasonably warm temperatures.
For the first time in more than three decades, beaches on Long Island will be open for swimming in October.
It’s because of this unseasonably warm weather. The average high in October is 64 degrees. Friday’s high was 86!
So you could swim as if it were July, celebrate Columbus Day, and shop for Halloween decorations all on the same afternoon.
And speaking of Halloween, it seems that adults have stolen it from their kids.
One sign of just how much Halloween has changed and can change is the relatively rapid development of it from a children’s holiday into a largely adult holiday. Adults are spending more and more on Halloween costumes, favors, and parties. Children’s celebrations have been curtailed and eclipsed. …
And that cries out for a limerick:
Hijacking Halloween
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The holiday called Halloween
Has been hijacked by grownups. How mean!
In their masks, adults stroll,
Looking scary or droll—
Some in garb that would best suit a teen.
(You can find more of my holiday humor here.)
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
