When I’m asked, “What’s your least fav invention?”
I waver: “Too many to mention!”
But when pressed, I select
The stiletto; feet wrecked
By the score just for leggy extension!
(National High Heels Day is celebrated on May 20.)
Posts Tagged ‘Feet Humor’
What Heel Invented Stilettos? (Limerick)
Sunday, September 3rd, 2023My Sock Solution (Limerick)
Thursday, March 17th, 2022I always wear socks inside out.
That’s unseemly to many, no doubt.
But my feet ain’t discreet:
“Scratchy sock-seams,” they bleat.
How I hate when extremities shout!
May 9 is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. And December 4 is National Sock Day.
Limerick Ode To Wiggle Your Toes Day
Tuesday, August 6th, 2013Wiggle Your Toes Day (August 6th) isn’t quite as silly as it sounds:
Limerick Ode To Wiggle Your Toes Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Since I’d like both my feet to obey,
I must exercise each ev’ry day:
I wiggle my toes,
Rotate heels — heaven knows
It looks lame, but forestalls foot decay.
Trendy Men, Heal Thyselves! (Limerick)
Tuesday, October 18th, 2011For those of you who visit this blog to keep up with trends, here’s the latest: High heels for men.
Trendy Men, Heal Thyselves! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
High heels worn by men on the rise?
I’m warning you guys, that ain’t wise.
It’s painful, unhealthy—
Makes foot doctors wealthy.
Spike this trend ere it reaches new highs.
Sheet Musing
Monday, May 16th, 2011Sheet Musing
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Both my legs travel down the fresh sheet.
It feels cool to the touch, tight, and neat.
Now fully stretched out
They relax and then … doubt.
A rough tear has assaulted my feet.
(Inspired by this prompt to write about texture and an over-priced, lousy sheet.)
Feet Trouble Afoot
Wednesday, January 5th, 2011Big Tent Poetry prompts us to write poems about feet this week. My pal Amanda’s already composed one. So, why not a limerick?
Feet Trouble Afoot
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I can’t always rely on my feet.
When I dance, they say “Please take a seat!”
Though I stretch ’em and bend ’em,
I can’t seem to mend ’em.
Of foot, I confess, I’m not fleet.
Shoo, Heels!
Wednesday, January 6th, 2010I’m short. Five-foot-zero, to be specific. But I never wear heels. Okay, I do have one pair of special-occasion shoes with a one-inch heel. Does that even count?
I forswore high heels way back in my early twenties. Why? Isn’t it obvious? Because they hurt! Besides, even if I braved three-inch heels, I’d still be really short. Plus I’ve never thought teetering was all that sexy.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Shoo, Heels!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m short, but wear flats — never heels.
Cuz they hurt. Gals, you know how it feels.
So my word to height seekers:
Just give me some sneakers,
Or flip flops, or better yet — wheels.
