A gambler I know, who’s a heel,
Asked to borrow some cash for a meal:
“I lost my last dime,
But I win all the time,
So just one crappy hand’s no big deal!”
Posts Tagged ‘Debt Humor’
The Would-Be Borrower (Limerick)
Saturday, May 6th, 2023Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: CHIP at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: September 17, 2022)
Saturday, August 20th, 2022It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CHIP at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to RELAXATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best RELAXATION-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: DEFECT, SMART, VOICE, SHAME, TASTE.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 18, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 17, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CHIP-rhyme limerick:
A fellow who thought he was hip
And who bragged he’d invented a chip,
Would attempt to act cool,
But look like a fool;
Telltale chip-crumbs bespeckled his lip.
Here’s my RELAXATION-themed limerick:
A man was attempting to chill,
But his debt worries made him feel ill.
And all of his tries
To relax were unwise
Cuz they further inflated his bill.
And here is my RANDOM WORDS GENERATOR limerick:
With podcasts I’m highly selective;
Something witty and smart’s my objective.
Plus I must clear my choice
With my ears. If the voice
Is high-pitched, it’s, alas, deemed “defective.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Checkmate? (Limerick)
Friday, August 27th, 2021“Your payments have fallen behind.
Where’s my money?” the contractor whined.
“Our deal’s ‘a blank check’
To rebuild your wrecked deck.”
The reply: “Yes, that’s why it’s unsigned.”
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: PALE or PAIL or IMPALE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, January 9th, 2016It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using PALE or PAIL or IMPALE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write a themed limerick related to DOGS and/or CATS, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best dog and/or cat-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 24th, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 23, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A maritime lawyer from Yale
Feels his int’rest in law start to pale.
He’s filled with regret,
For he’s drowning in debt–
So at sea in his field, he can’t bail.
Please feel free to write your own limerick(s) using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Half-Baked Plan (Multi-Verse Limerick)
Thursday, July 11th, 2013Half-Baked Plan (Multi-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A baker would frequently groan
About needing a sizable loan
To build up a co
That would make her some dough,
In a quite disagreeable tone.
Her fam’ly kept warning her: “Groans
Simply aren’t conducive to loans.
You must demonstrate spine
And you never should whine.
Why not bribe all the lenders with scones?”
She brought some fresh scones to the bank.
They were primo — she had them to thank
For an influx of cash.
So she threw a big bash
And got baked — ended up in the tank.
Hung over, she signed a bad lease;
Her new landlord sure knew how to fleece.
And business was dicey,
The scones way too pricey–
Her sale price was ten bucks a piece.
So her scone bus’ness quickly went under,
Her finances torn quite asunder.
“My expenses have grown,”
She’d moan on the phone
To her funder, who groaned, “What a blunder!”
Shrill Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, March 11th, 2012It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s who won last week.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal who was terribly shrill…*
or
A man who was terribly shrill…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Shrill Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal who was terribly shrill
Was stunned by a very high bill.
She shrieked and she raved,
Till her creditor caved:
“Please, I’ll cut it in half, if you chill.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Prone Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, December 4th, 2011It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A guy who was frequently prone…
or
A gal who was frequently prone…
Here’s mine:
Prone Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A guy who was frequently prone
To gamble with cash from a loan,
Dealt with lenders who whack
When you don’t pay them back.
Now he’s prone in cement, grave unknown.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
