Posts Tagged ‘Clothes Shopping’
Saturday, May 29th, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SET or BeSET or UpSET at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TRENDS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TRENDS-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 13, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 12, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SET or BeSET or UpSET-rhyme limerick:
I need all the sleep I can get,
But I can’t get to sleep on a bet.
(Or a bed, for that matter.)
I blame all the chatter
My brain conjures up. I’m beset.
And here’s my TRENDS-themed limerick:
If I tried to be cool, I would fail.
Trends are nothing I ever would hail.
If I wear something “in,”
It has probably been
Purchased decades ago … and on sale.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Clothes Shopping, Clothing Humor, Competition Limerick, Fad Humor, Insomnia Humor, Insomnia Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Shopping Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Sleep Limerick, Trends Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Fashion Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 150 Comments »
Sunday, February 16th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CASH or CACHE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to CLOTHING, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best CLOTHING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on March 1, 2020 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 29, 2020 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CASH/CACHE-Rhyme limerick:
I’m in a big rush and must dash
To the bank, cuz I’m all out of cash.
Then there’s lunch and a meeting
And hours of tweeting
Snide gripes — pols and neighbors to bash.
And here’s my CLOTHING-themed limerick:
A woman was totally bare;
She’d removed all her clothes on a dare,
Then shopped aroun’ town
Till a cop flagged her down.
Her excuse? “I have nothing to wear.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Clothes Shopping, Competition Limerick, Law And Order, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money Limerick, Nudity, Poetry & Prompts, Police Humor, Social Media Humor, Tweet Humor, Twitter Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Shopping Humor, Social Media Humor, Twitter Humor | 128 Comments »
Tuesday, April 25th, 2017
Headline of the Day: “For $425, Nordstrom will sell you a pair of dirty jeans.”
Pricey fashion (to me) doesn’t track,
And much of it makes my jaws slack,
Such as pre-muddied jeans;
Yes, people with means
Can buy ’em at Nordstrom, alack!
Tags: Buying Jeans, Clothes Shopping, Dirty Jeans, Fashion Satire, Fashion Verse, Jeans Humor, Nordstrom, Style Humor
Posted in Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Shopping Humor | Comments Off on Out Of Whack Fashion (Limerick)
Saturday, March 18th, 2017
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GRILL/GRILLE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to POWER, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best POWER-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on April 2, 2017 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 1, 2017 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
When I tried to return a gas grill,
I felt burned when the owner said “Chill!”
So I countered with heat:
“It won’t light! You’re a cheat!
“Take it back, or you’ll soon need a will.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Clothes Shopping, Competition Limerick, Cooking Humor, Food Humor, Gas Grills, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Shopping Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Shopping Humor | 126 Comments »
Wednesday, July 1st, 2015
Yet Another Donald Trump Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Donald’s a pain in the rump.
Just seeing his name makes me jump
And turn grumpy and peeved,
So I’m rather relieved:
Macy’s dumping the “fashion” line “Trump.”
(More Donald Trump humor here.)
Tags: Clothes Humor, Clothes Shopping, Donald Trump, Fashion Humor, Macy's, Shopping Humor
Posted in Clothing Humor, Donald Trump, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Shopping Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, December 6th, 2012
I learned a new word today: Nobby, which means elegant and stylish. Please don’t dress me down for using it in a limerick:
Nobby Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A chic woman arrived in the lobby
Of a shop that was known to be snobby.
But its nobby couture
Held for her no allure:
Sky-high hems don’t suit knees that are knobby.
UPDATE: October 22 is National Knee Day.
Tags: Chic Limerick, Clothes Shopping, Clothing Humor, Couture Verse, Fashion Verse, Knees, National Knee Day, Nobby, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Physical Appearance, Shopping Humor, Stores Limerick, Style Humor
Posted in Fashion Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Physical Appearance, Shopping Humor | 16 Comments »
Friday, June 15th, 2012
The Astute Dad (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A dad who was very astute
Always yearned for good Father’s Day loot,
But for decades got ties
That were hard on the eyes.
He exchanged forty ties for a suit.
(Linked at Poetry Jam, which asks us to celebrate.)
Tags: Clothes Shopping, Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Father's Day Humor, Gift Humor, Holiday Gifts, June Holidays, Men's Clothes Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Shopping Humor
Posted in Fashion Humor, Holiday Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor | 10 Comments »
Monday, January 5th, 2009
Thanks to all of you for your kind emails, comments, and Twitter tweets about my mother’s death. I really appreciate it!
In my mother’s honor, I’m posting a 1996 humor column she inspired during happier (and funnier) times:
Secret Shopper
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“I’m not going in there. No way. Forget it.”
My seventy-something mother’s stance was as rigid as her words; arms folded across her chest, unyielding legs pointed away from the shop I’d just suggested.
She and I had spent the entire afternoon combing through three department stores for the definitive pair of panties. Or at least my mom’s idea of same. This illusive undergarment had to be loose, comfortable, 100% cotton, and totally devoid of lace. And that was just for starters. It also had to completely cover my mother’s hips and come in a large size, the exact number of which she resolutely refused to disclose. … (Secret Shopper is continued here.)
Tags: Clothes Shopping, Clothing, Department Stores, Fashion, Mothers, Parents, Style, Undergarments, Victoria's Secret
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Humor Columns & Humorous Essays, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Personal, Relationship Humor, Shopping Humor | 2 Comments »
Friday, August 24th, 2007
If you’re ever in Scottsdale, Arizona and feel the need to buy jeans, prepare yourself for a scary rear view:
Worried that new pair of high-fashion jeans may just make your butt look fat? Now shoppers in one upscale Scottsdale store [The Hub] can check it out for themselves before someone else makes the observation – using the Butt Cam, a camera positioned just so that’s connected to a video screen on a dressing room wall.
And if that doesn’t sound bad enough:
The setup also allows Hub employees to display views of their more confident shoppers on flat-screen TVs behind the cash registers for all to see.
This brings me to my latest limerick:
No Butt Cams For Me — No Ifs, Ands, Or Buts
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Butt Cam sure sounds rather crass,
But it gives you a view of your ass
While you’re trying on jeans.
And you know what that means?
It should tell almost all: “Take a pass!”
(You can find more of my fashion and shopping humor here.)
Tags: Butt Cam, Butt Camera, Buying Jeans, Clothes Shopping, Dressing Room Cameras, Fashion Satire, Scottsdale Arizona, Shopping Humor, Video Screens
Posted in Business Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Marketing Humor, Physical Appearance, Polls, Shopping Humor | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, October 17th, 2006
“I’m not going in there. No way. Forget it.”
My seventy-something mother’s stance was as rigid as her words; arms folded across her chest, unyielding legs pointed away from the shop I’d just suggested.
She and I had spent the entire afternoon combing through three department stores for the definitive pair of panties. Or at least my mom’s idea of same. This illusive undergarment had to be loose, comfortable, 100% cotton, and totally devoid of lace. And that was just for starters. It also had to completely cover my mother’s hips and come in a large size, the exact number of which she resolutely refused to disclose. … (Secret Shopper is continued here.)
Tags: Clothes Shopping, Clothing Humor, Comfortable Clothing, Department Stores, Mother Humor, Parental Humor, Style Humor, Underwear Humor, Victoria's Secret
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Fashion Humor, Humor Columns & Humorous Essays, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Relationship Humor, Shopping Humor | 10 Comments »
