I should put my local tow guy on a yearly retainer. Here’s a typical conversation:
Me: Hi, it’s me, Madeleine Kane. Guess whose husband left the lights on again. My address is…
Tow Guy: Still have you down from last week. Have you considered our frequent user plan? … (Tow Guy Blues is continued here.)
I probably shouldn’t admit this, but I’m prejudiced against people who drive red cars.
Yes, I know — bias is bad, and I’m very ashamed. But in my defense, let me add that RED CAR DRIVERS ARE LUNATICS.
Oops, did I say that? Sorry! I promise that from now on I’ll stop maligning those CERTIFIABLE MANIACS CAREENING AROUND IN BRIGHT RED AUTOMOBILES. … (Drivers Who Make Me See Red is continued here.)
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
