Posts Tagged ‘Bathroom Humor’
Saturday, August 27th, 2016
For folks in a tight money squeeze,
Don’t raise the bath tissue price, please.
Though it’s paper-made true,
This factor I rue:
Bathroom tissue does NOT grow on trees.
A belated National Toilet Paper Day. (Aug. 26)
*****
UPDATE: The United Nations celebrates “World Toilet Day” on November 19.
Tags: August Holidays, Bath Tissue, Bathroom Humor, Bathroom Tissue, Money & Finance Humor, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Paper Humor, Toilet Paper Day, Toilet Tissue, Tree Humor, United Nations, World Toilet Day
Posted in Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Sunday, July 3rd, 2016
Happy “Eat Beans Day!”
A man was incensed because beans
Caused an ailment he’d had since his teens;
His digestion was marred
To the point he was barred
From small rooms, though allowed in latrines.
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Beans Limerick, Digestion Humor, Eat Beans Day, Food Humor, Food Verse, July Holidays, Odd Holidays
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Spilling The Beans About “Eat Beans Day” (Limerick)
Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014
According to this video, I’m not the only person who sometimes finds bathroom signs confusing.
Bathroom Signs Shouldn’t Be In Code (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Sipping drinks at a trendy new bar,
I’m hoping the john isn’t far.
I rush off on my quest
For a bathroom addressed
To my needs and find symbols bizarre.
So which one’s for gals? Which for guys?
Posting puzzles for drinkers ain’t wise.
I start ravin’: “Be clear!
Tell us ‘Females Go Here.'”
But alas, I must guess and … surprise!
I walk in and find menfolk galore,
Lots of urinals, yellow-soaked floor.
And the smell — unfresh hell —
Sends me rushing pell mell
To the john meant for me. Nevermore!
Tags: Bar Humor, Bathroom Humor, Bathroom Signs, Gender Humor, Public Bathroom Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks | 2 Comments »
Thursday, August 15th, 2013
I wish I were making this London singles event up, but apparently not:
You like pub crawls? Then here’s some great news
For singles who care about loos
And do not mind their scent:
There’s a singles event—
Toilet dates. I’d prefer just the booze.
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, Drinking Humor, Great Britain, Historic Loos, Liquor Humor, London, Loos, Pub Crawls, Singles Humor, Toilet Humor
Posted in Dating Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on At The Risk Of Dating Myself, This Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
Thursday, June 6th, 2013
I’m both steamed and in a lather over this stinky new “cleansing reduction” trend. I don’t know about you, but in our house, daily showers are a fixture.
This Trend Stinks (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s a trend that I’d sure like to quell:
Bidding show’ring each day a farewell.
Daily cleansing’s essential
And highly prudential:
If you don’t shower daily, you smell.
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Body Odor, British Humor, Cleanliness Humor, Daily Cleansing, Odd Trends, Shower Humor, Shower Verse, Smell Limerick, Trends Humor, UK Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Health & Medical Humor, Limericks, Odd Trends, Physical Appearance, Smell Humor | Comments Off on This Trend Stinks (Limerick)
Wednesday, January 23rd, 2013
Warning: If you’re into energy bars, be sure to read the label before ingesting:
The latest energy bar on the market uses crickets as its protein source.
Living Earth natural food store in Worcester started selling Feed The Revolution bars around Christmas.
The crickets are raised in Utah and ground into a fine powder said to be high in protein…
Are Cricket Bars Cricket? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A bathroom-bound man felt sub-par
After eating an energy bar.
He exclaimed, “Sticky wicket!
I’ve just eaten cricket!
Insect protein is going too far!”
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Crickets, Energy Bars, Feed The Revolution, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Health Limericks, Insect and Bug Humor, Living Earth, Protein Sources, Utah
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Insect Humor, Limericks | 21 Comments »
Tuesday, May 8th, 2012
Yet Another Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Oh, what have I done to my Mark:
Taught him limerick writing, and hark!
Now he’ll draft something new,
Then lug laptop to loo —
I can’t hide from his poetry arc.
(Note from Mad Kane: I’m really not making this up. On Sunday, Mark followed me into the bathroom, carrying his laptop. That’s how eager he was to show me his latest limerick.)
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Creativity, Husband Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Husbands & Wives, Mark Kane, Marriage Verse, Show-Offs, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 17 Comments »
Monday, April 19th, 2010
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A miserly fellow name Joe…
Here’s the limerick I wrote with that line. (It’s a two-verser, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)
Miserly Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A miserly fellow name Joe
Was obsessed with his weekly cash flow.
The guy was so petty,
He ordered wife Betty
To flush once a day. She said, “No!”
Then he yelled, “You are wasteful and low!”
But she said, “It’s distasteful. No go!”
So he sued for divorce—
An asinine course.
Now the lawyers have all of his dough.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Cash Flow Humor, Divorce Humor, Law Limerick, Marriage Verse, Misers, Money Poems, Obsession Verse, Pettiness, Poetry & Prompts, Toilet Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, House & Home Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Obsessions Humor, Poetry & Prompts | 16 Comments »
Wednesday, February 24th, 2010
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this as a first line:
There once was a woman named Ann…
Here’s mine:
A Miss-Misunderstanding
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a woman named Ann,
Who people assumed was a man.
When she walked in the ladies,
They yelled out, “No matees!”
And that’s when the shit hit the fan.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.
Tags: Bathroom Humor, Feminist Humor, Poetry Prompt, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Feminist Satire, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Physical Appearance, Poetry & Prompts | 27 Comments »
Wednesday, November 18th, 2009
I understand why buying a car or a home appliance or pricey wine would require some research. But purchasing towels shouldn’t be all that complicated. So why is it that whenever my husband and I buy towels, they suck? Actually the problem is … they don’t suck.
Neither High, Nor Dry (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Our new towels seemed fine at first blush.
They were velvety smooth and so plush.
But they don’t absorb well.
You might say they repel.
Can’t our towels act more like a lush?
Tags: Bath Towels, Bathroom Humor, House & Home, Housewares, Shopping Verse, Shower Humor
Posted in House & Home Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Shopping Humor | 3 Comments »
