Posts Tagged ‘August Holidays’
Saturday, September 10th, 2022
It’s “Banana Day,” giving me a great excuse to bitch about bananas. (It’s lucky that Mark and I like them at different stages of ripeness. Otherwise, they’d all end up tossed into the garbage.)
“You should eat that banana today,”
Says Mark. “Ugh, it’s TOO ripe,” I say.
“It peaked overnight.
Now it’s yours. Have a bite!
It’s perfect for you; old and gray.”
Tags: April Holidays, August Holidays, Banana Day, Banana Lovers Day, Bananas Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Food Verse, Fruit Humor, Fruit Limerick, National Banana Lover's Day, Odd Holidays, September Holidays
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Eat A Banana? Nah! (Limerick)
Monday, July 11th, 2022
Wherever I go (or I’ve been)
Bugs attack me, ignoring my kin.
I scratch and I itch
And I can’t help but bitch…
Cuz mosquitoes get under my skin!
Update: August 20 is World Mosquito Day.
Tags: August Holidays, Bug Humor, Bug Limerick, Bugs, Husband and Wife Humor, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limericks, Insect and Bug Humor, Insect Bites, Insect Humor, Insect Limerick, Insects, Mosquito Humor, Mosquitoes, Odd Holidays, Outdoors, Summer Gripes, Summer Humor, World Mosquito Day
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Insect Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Outdoors Humor, Relationship Humor, Seasons Humor, Weather Humor | Comments Off on Still Bugged By Mosquitoes (Limerick)
Thursday, August 26th, 2021
Happy “National Dog Day.” (August 26)
My favorite breed is the “mutt.”
Yes, I know you’re about to say “But,
That isn’t a breed.”
I’m aware, but I need
To annoy nutty dog snobs who strut.
(National Mutt Day is celebrated on two days: July 31 and December 2.)
Tags: Animal & Pet Humor, Animal Holidays, Animal Limericks, August Holidays, December Holidays, Dog Day, Dog Holidays, Dog Humor, Dog Limericks, July Holidays, Mutt Day, Mutt Humor, Mutt Limerick, National Dog Day, National Mutt Day, Odd Holidays
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, August 24th, 2021
Some people shouldn’t be trusted with knives… and I’m one of them.
Happy National Knife Day. (August 24)
For decades I wrangled with cane;
Cutting, carving, and whittling — my bane.
Wielding knives in my hands
As the oboe demands,
I made reeds — time (and blood) down the drain.
Tags: August Holidays, Kitchen Humor, Knife Day, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, National Knife Day, Oboe Humor, Oboe Limerick, Oboe Reeds, Odd Holidays, Reed Humor, Silverware Humor, Utensils, Weapons
Posted in Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays, Weapons Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, August 19th, 2021
I’ve written my “Dear Chef” limerick to celebrate “National Hot And Spicy Food Day.” (August 19)
I like food that is spicy and hot.
Serve it bland? It’s returned on the spot.
Don’t assume you know best;
Second-guessing a guest
Means you’ve failed at your quest by a lot.
Tags: August Holidays, Chef Humor, Chef Limerick, Food Humor, Food Verse, Hot And Spicy Food Day, Odd Holidays, Restaurant Humor, Restaurant Limerick, Spicy Food
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Odd Holidays, Restaurant Reviews & Humor | Comments Off on Dear Chef (Limerick)
Sunday, August 15th, 2021
It’s “National Relaxation Day” (August 15), so an insomnia limerick seems more or less on point:
I’m exhausted, worn out, barely slept.
Some brain-part is surely inept.
My mind’s in a scrum;
Relaxation won’t come.
How I wish I were sleeping-adept!
Tags: August Holidays, Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Insomnia Humor, Insomnia Limerick, Insomnia Verse, National Relaxation Day, Odd Holidays, Relaxation Day, Relaxation Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Sleep Limerick
Posted in Mental Health Humor, Odd Holidays, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, August 21st, 2019
A woman with terrible taste
Believed fashion and style were a waste,
And when items she owned
Became trendy she groaned;
They were thrown in the garbage posthaste.
Happy World Fashion Day! (August 21)
Tags: August Holidays, Clothing Humor, Fashion Day, Fashion Limerick, Odd Holidays, Style Limerick, World Fashion Day
Posted in Clothing Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Unfashionable Limerick
Wednesday, August 14th, 2019
I’m not a big fan of rosé.
Drink anything pink? I say “Nay!”
I’ll have white wine or red,
Or some cognac, instead.
Even better, tequila! Olé!
Happy International Rosé Day! (August 14)
Tags: Alcohol Verse, August Holidays, Cognac Humor, Drink Holidays, Food and Drink, International Rosé Day, Odd Holidays, Rosé Day, Tequila, Wine Humor, Wine Limerick
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Not Tickled Pink Over Rosé (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 13th, 2019
I was reading some mind-numbing prose,
Which apparently caused me to doze.
I’ve awakened — can’t see!
Did my eyeglasses flee,
Somehow slipping from nose-tip to toes?
Happy Eyeglasses Day! (August 13)
Tags: August Holidays, Eye Humor, Eyeglasses Day, Eyeglasses Verse, Eyes Humor, Eyes Limerick, Eyesight Humor, National Eyeglasses Day, Odd Holidays, Reading Humor, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Vision Humor, Vision Limerick
Posted in Limericks, Odd Holidays, Vision Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Eyeglasses
Tuesday, August 13th, 2019
Happy Filet Mignon Day! (August 13)
Dear chef, though I rarely eat steak,
There is one small exception I’ll make:
A dainty filet
Mignon makes my day.
No imposter-cuts! Don’t be a snake!
Tags: August Holidays, Filet Mignon Day, Food Holidays, National Filet Mignon Day, Odd Holidays
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Filet Mignon
Friday, August 2nd, 2019
A coloring book meant for those
Who ain’t kids anymore? Heaven knows
Why the market’s gone mad
With this dubious fad.
I’ll be sticking with lim’ricks and prose.
Happy National Coloring Book Day! (August 2)
Tags: Art Humor, August Holidays, Book Humor, Coloring Book Day, Fad Humor, Odd Holidays, Strange Fads
Posted in Art Humor / Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Color Me Confused (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 30th, 2016
Lying down on the sand to get tanned
Is a pastime I NEVER have planned.
And my swim skills are grim,
Way too hard on my vim.
But long walks on non-beach-land are grand.
Happy National Beach Day! (Aug. 30)
Tags: August Holidays, Beach Humor, Leisure Activities, Leisure Time Humor, National Beach Day, Odd Holidays, Recreation & Fun Humor, Sand Humor, Sun, Sun Bathing Humor, Swimming, Swimming Humor, Tanning Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Recreation & Fun Humor | Comments Off on Beach Day (Limerick)
Saturday, August 27th, 2016
For folks in a tight money squeeze,
Don’t raise the bath tissue price, please.
Though it’s paper-made true,
This factor I rue:
Bathroom tissue does NOT grow on trees.
A belated National Toilet Paper Day. (Aug. 26)
*****
UPDATE: The United Nations celebrates “World Toilet Day” on November 19.
Tags: August Holidays, Bath Tissue, Bathroom Humor, Bathroom Tissue, Money & Finance Humor, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Paper Humor, Toilet Paper Day, Toilet Tissue, Tree Humor, United Nations, World Toilet Day
Posted in Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Thursday, August 25th, 2016
Help! It’s Sean Connery Day!
Sean Connery’s speech drives me mad
Cuz his diction is fiendishly bad.
Yet he’s worshipped, adored;
Fervid film buffs, un-Moored,
Won’t shush up their Sean-mimicry fad.
Tags: Actor Humor, August Holidays, Celebrity Humor, Diction Humor, Impersonation Humor, Lisp, Mimicry Humor, Odd Holidays, Sean Connery, Sean Connery Day, Speech Humor
Posted in Actors & Actresses, Celebrations Poetry, Celebrity Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Help! It’s Sean Connery Day! (Limerick)
Wednesday, August 10th, 2016
An employee asleep at the switch
Created a dangerous glitch.
The lazy-ass slob
Fell down on the job.
It seems working just isn’t his niche.
Happy National Lazy Day!
Tags: August Holidays, Laziness Humor., Laziness Limerick, National Lazy Day, Odd Holidays, Workplace & Career Humor, Workplace Limerick
Posted in Limericks, Odd Holidays, Workplace & Career Humor | 3 Comments »
Thursday, February 25th, 2016
A woman who never had bowled
Married into that sport-loving fold.
Forced to play — what a pickle!
But luck is so fickle;
Once beleaguered, she’s relishing gold.
(February 25 is Go Bowling Day, and the second Saturday in August is National Bowling Day.)
Tags: August Holidays, Bowling Humor, February Holidays, Go Bowling Day, National Bowling Day, Odd Holidays, Sports Humor, Sports Limerick
Posted in Limericks, Odd Holidays, Sports Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Bowling
Saturday, November 7th, 2015
Just in time for Book Lovers Day, celebrated both on the first Saturday of November and on August 9:
Like most of my friends I love books,
And I don’t want to read them on Nooks
Or other devices;
Real paper entices.
Don’t dare give me pity-filled looks!
Tags: August Holidays, Authors & Playwrights, Book Lovers Day, Computer Humor, E-Books, E-Readers, Electronic Devices, Kindles, Nooks, November Holidays, Odd Holidays, Technology Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Authors & Playwrights, Book Publishing Humor, Books, Computer Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Technology Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 1 Comment »
