Archive for the ‘Writing & Publishing Humor’ Category
Saturday, June 7th, 2014
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was trying to write…*
or
A woman, convinced she was right…*
or
We’re lost. You were s’posed to turn right…*
or
A man who believed might makes right…*
or
A gal was engaged in a rite…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Rite
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman was trying to write,
But her right and left brains had a fight.
So her muse, unamused,
Feeling slighted, abused
And benighted took flight, just for spite.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Creativity, Inspirational Verse, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Muse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Creativity Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Writing & Publishing Humor | 78 Comments »
Friday, June 6th, 2014
A Rhyme To The Wise (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A scrappy young felon liked rhyme,
So he promised himself — no more crime.
He’d instead be a rapper.
But here is the capper:
His “confessional tunes” got him time.
So limerick writers, take heed.
Your rhymes may be next. They could feed
A detective’s suspicions,
Who deems them admissions.
Then indictment — your verse his first lead.
Note: Legal experts are currently debating the surprisingly widespread use of rap lyrics in criminal cases.
Tags: Crime & Punishment Humor, Law Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 2 Comments »
Monday, May 12th, 2014
It’s Limerick Day, in honor of Edward Lear’s birthday on May 12th, and so…
Yet Another Limerick Day Ode to Edward Lear
By Madeleine Begun Kane
On May 12th I must celebrate Lear,
Though he’s mostly to blame, it is clear,
For my rhyming affliction
And lim’rick addiction;
I’m perversely a fan, so I cheer.
Tags: Birthday Limerick, Celebrations Poetry, Edward Lear, Holiday Poetry, May Holidays, National Limerick Day, Odd Holidays, Writers
Posted in Authors & Playwrights, Birthday Verse, Celebrations Poetry, Celebrity Humor, Light Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, April 15th, 2014
Passing Over Some Rules (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though I’m Jewish, I’m still eating bread
And refuse to munch matzo instead.
I spurn rules all the time,
Except canons of rhyme
And of meter … so don’t be misled.
Tags: April Holidays, Bread, Jewish Holidays, Jewish Humor, Matza Humor, Matzo Humor, Matzoh Humor, Meter Humor, Passover, Passover Humor, Religion Humor, Rhyme Humor, Unleavened Bread, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Holiday Humor, Jewish Humor, Limericks, Religion Verse, Writing & Publishing Humor | 1 Comment »
Friday, February 7th, 2014
A recent article over at DVerse Poets discusses the importance of using vivid verbs in poetry. And though I completely agree, I couldn’t resist writing this limerick:
Fun With Verbs (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
One never should write. One should scribe.
One must NOT coincide. Instead, jibe.
Are verbs that have color
Much better than duller?
I’m bewildered — must drink … or imbibe.
Boring adjective-freedom’s my goal,
And dull adverbs can sure take their toll.
I abjure and forswear them
And simply can’t bear them.
In this verse, though, they’re taking control.
Perhaps with Verse 3, I’ll succeed
In banishing words I don’t need.
Not an adverb in sight,
Nor an adjective blight.
Push my luck? No, not me! End of screed.
Tags: Drink Verse, Drinking Limerick, DVerse, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 5 Comments »
Friday, January 17th, 2014
I read about horrifying trends, so you don’t have to. How’d you like some three and four-dollars-per-slice “artisanal toast?”
Paying Lots Of Bread … For Toast (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Artisanal toast’s a new trend.
Does this four-dollar-slice fad portend
Even worse things to come?
Perhaps hipster-style gum?
Or lim’ricks, bespoke, pric’ly penned?
Tags: Bespoke Limericks, Food Verse, Hipster Humor, Hipster Trends, Money Verse, Odd Trends, Style, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Social Satire, Trends Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, December 17th, 2013
Another Snow Job (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Mark, thanks for shov’ling today.
If you hadn’t, that snow’d surely stay
Until I did the chore,
A job I abhor.
It’s more fun to make limerick hay.
Tags: Home Ownership, Poetry Humor, Seasonal Verse, Shoveling Snow, Snow Poetry, Weather Humor, Weather Poem, Winter Humor, Writers
Posted in Chores Humor, House & Home Humor, Marriage Humor, Outdoors Humor, Seasons Humor, Weather Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, November 14th, 2013
When I’m looking for limerick ideas, I sometimes visit idiom list sites, like this one. Then I’ll select an idiom that might work meter-wise and that ends with a common rhyme sound.
And so today, I challenged myself to write a limerick that contains the phrase “dry run.” Unconsciously inspired, perhaps, by the inept roll-out of Obamacare, I wrote these two lines:
A software firm held a dry run
But the coding, alas, wasn’t done…
I swiftly thought up an acceptable “B-rhyme,” but then got stuck at line 5. The best I could come up with was an ending that employed yet another idiom: “under the gun.” But I still couldn’t think of a line 5 that was even slightly clever.
And then I got an idea: create some wordplay by revising another line, adding specificity to the subject matter. Here’s the result:
Limerick Dry Run
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A software firm held a dry run,
But the arms-tracking code wasn’t done.
It failed test after test,
Till the owner confessed:
“I’m too stressed to work under the gun.”
Tags: Anatomy Of A Limerick, Anxiety Humor, Computer Humor, Computer Software, Idioms Humor, Stress Humor, Technology Humor, Under The Gun, Wordplay Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor, Wordplay, Writing & Publishing Humor | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, October 16th, 2013
Limerick Ode To Dictionary Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
At this moment, I’m feeling quite spurred
To just soak up a new-to-me word.
Lest you think I’m all wet,
I have reasons — don’t fret:
Webster’s birthday’s today, so I’m stirred.
Have you any new words to suggest?
One that’s odd or obscure would be best.
Something wickedly cool,
Like “facinorous.” Who’ll
Help ensure that my word need’s addressed?
****
American lexicographer Noah Webster, of dictionary compilation fame, was born October 16, 1758.
Tags: Dictionary Humor, Language Satire, Noah Webster, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Webster's Dictionary, Words Humor
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, October 9th, 2013
Not A-Mused (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Inspiration is gone — I’m bereft,
For I fear my dear muse has just left.
And my brain’s auto-rhymer
Is spent — the old-timer
Says, “Write something rhyme-free with heft.”
A serious verse that’s rhyme-free?
I’m sorry — that just isn’t me.
I don’t layer my verse
Or deep meaning disperse.
I’d rather spread light-hearted glee.
If you’re waiting for metaphor, stop.
And a simile simply won’t pop.
My verse just won’t hatch
Without rhyme — that’s the catch:
An unfertilized limerick crop.
Tags: Creativity, Inspiration, Muse, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Creativity Verse, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 18 Comments »
Thursday, October 3rd, 2013
Happy birthday to Chubby Checker! The father of the twist (my favorite dance) was born October 3, 1941.
I thought I’d celebrate with an acrostic limerick, which is as mind-bending as the twist is body-bending:
Acrostic Limerick Ode To Chubby Checker
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There’s a dance with a hot checkered past.
We grooved on its moves — whirling fast!
I still do it today,
Shifting weight, as I sway–
Twirling waist motion, saucily cast.
If you’re asking yourself, “What’s an acrostic limerick?” here’s some info:
In an acrostic poem, the first letter of each line should, taken together, spell out the topic of your poem. Please note that it’s NOT enough to spell out a word; Your limerick or other poem must describe or otherwise directly relate to that word.
Tags: Acrostic Limerick, Acrostic Poems, Acrostic Poetry Challenge, Celebrity Birthdays, Chubby Checker, Dance Humor, Dance Limerick, Music Limerick, Poetry Forms, Twist
Posted in Acrostic Limericks, Acrostic Madness, Acrostic Poetry Prompts, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Forms, Poetry Rules, Writing & Publishing Humor | 16 Comments »
Tuesday, September 24th, 2013
Happy National Punctuation Day (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When you punctuate, please don’t be rash.
Over-use can turn prose into ash.
And a comma misplaced
Lays your writing to waste.
Mark my words … or your readers shall dash.
(National Punctuation Day is celebrated yearly on September 24th.)
Tags: Grammar Humor, Grammar Limerick, Language Satire, National Punctuation Day, Odd Holidays, Punctuation Humor, September Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Celebrations Poetry, Language Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
Written with fond apologies to the late, lamented Elmore Leonard, after re-reading his New York Times piece, WRITERS ON WRITING; Easy on the Adverbs, Exclamation Points and Especially Hooptedoodle. (His article cautions against the abuse of prologues, adverbs and other description, exclamation points, weather references, regional dialect, the word “suddenly,” etc.)
On a hot, sunny day, an attractive young man sat in a tiny, darkened room, compulsively reading Elmore Leonard’s essay on writing. Carefully noting his ten writing no-nos, he bellowed loudly, “Fuggedaboutit! I can violate all of Leonard’s rules in a single limerick!”
“It’s raining!” he loudly cried out.
Then suddenly felt like a lout.
“A mensch I shall be…”
From this you can see
Leonard’s rules are what writing’s about.
Tags: Elmore Leonard, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Rules, Writing Satire
Posted in Celebrity Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 12 Comments »
Thursday, July 4th, 2013
I’ve decided to post an extra challenge this week, just in case my Limerick-Offs aren’t keeping you busy enough. Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to write an ACROSTIC poem that has something to do with FOOD, in any form you choose, be it limerick, haiku, quatrain, tanka, etc.
What’s an acrostic poem?
In an acrostic poem, the first letter of each line should, taken together, spell out the topic of your poem. Please note that it’s NOT enough to spell out a word; Your limerick or other poem must describe or otherwise directly relate to that word.
I’ll illustrate with an acrostic limerick, bolding the first letter of each line, for emphasis:
Acrostic Spice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Sometimes people like food that is bland.
Perhaps some enjoy cooking that’s canned.
I, in case I can’t savor
Cuisine that lacks flavor,
Embellish the dishes, by hand.
UPDATE: June 10th is National Herbs And Spices Day and August 19 is Hot And Spicy Food Day.
Tags: Acrostic Limerick, Acrostic Poems, Acrostic Poetry Challenge, Food Limerick, Hot And Spicy Food Day, June Holidays, National Herbs And Spices Day, Odd Holidays, Poetry Forms, Spices Humor, Spicy Food
Posted in Acrostic Limericks, Acrostic Madness, Acrostic Poetry Prompts, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Forms, Poetry Rules, Writing & Publishing Humor | 16 Comments »
Thursday, June 13th, 2013
I’ve decided to post an extra challenge this week, just in case my Limerick-Offs aren’t keeping you busy enough. Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to write an ACROSTIC poem that has something to do with MUSIC, in any form you choose, be it limerick, haiku, quatrain, tanka, etc.
What’s an acrostic poem?
In an acrostic poem, the first letter of each line should, taken together, spell out the topic of your poem.
I’ll illustrate with an acrostic limerick, bolding the first letter of each line, for emphasis:
Oh the sound of this instrument’s glorious,
But playing it’s rather laborious.
Out a thin double reed
Emerge notes that indeed
Sound sweetly intense, or uproarious.
Tags: Acrostic Limerick, Acrostic Poems, Acrostic Poetry Challenge, Music Limerick, Oboe, Poetry Forms
Posted in Acrostic Limericks, Acrostic Madness, Acrostic Poetry Prompts, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Forms, Poetry Rules, Writing & Publishing Humor | 6 Comments »
Saturday, May 11th, 2013
Today, May 12th, is Limerick Day, in honor of Edward Lear’s birthday. So it’s an especially good day for a Limerick-Off. And my own limerick seems particularly appropriate too.
As you all know by now, I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman who’d swim in the buff…*
or
A fellow was trying to buff…*
or
A savvy astronomy buff… (or zoology or economy or gastronomy buff, etc.) *
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Buff (2-Verse)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a limerick buff
Who of rhyming could not get enough.
She would rhyme night and day
In a metrical way,
Writing verse that her spouse labeled fluff.
It was clearly a matter of time
Till their marriage erupted in crime.
Things came to a head;
Now her husband is dead.
Cause of death — spouse aversion to rhyme.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Edward Lear, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, May Holidays, National Limerick Day, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Writing & Publishing Humor | 85 Comments »
Tuesday, May 7th, 2013
This feels vaguely appropriate for Mother’s Day:
Freelance Mothering (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Be it newspapers, Web, magazines,
Mistakes are in print and on screens:
Though I’ve NO kids to nag,
I once learned in a mag:
I’m the very proud mother of teens.
True story: Many years ago I wrote several freelance humor columns for Family Circle Magazine, one of which was a “humorous contract” between parents and their teen about learning to drive.
I’ll never forget standing on a long line at the supermarket and spotting the issue I was scheduled to appear in, near the cash register. I grabbed the magazine, turned to the back page and excitedly started to read.
Everything look great … until I got to the bio note, which should have read: “Madeleine Begun Kane is a New York-based freelance humor columnist and lawyer.”
Instead, it read, “Madeleine Begun Kane is the mother of teens.”
And no, I do NOT have any children … unless, of course, you count my hubby Mark.
Tags: Children Humor, Freelance Writing, Media Limerick, Mother's Day Limericks, Mothering Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Parenting Humor, Print Magazines, Teens, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Car & Driving Humor, Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Media Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | Comments Off on Freelance Mothering
Thursday, March 7th, 2013
Happy National Cereal Day! (March 7th)
Limerick Ode To National Cereal Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Breakfast foods sit atop of the list
Of things that we need to subsist.
So toast “Cereal Day.”
“Not bowled over,” you say?
I milk nonsense. That’s how I exist.
Tags: Breakfast Humor, Cereal Limerick, Food Poem, Food Verse, March Holidays, National Cereal Day, Odd Holidays
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor | 4 Comments »
