I’m a rhymer, a limerick drafter,
A chronic light-poetry crafter.
I’ve been labeled a “card,”
And called “daft,” but not “bard.”
What’s my target? Grins, giggles, and laughter.
Archive for the ‘Writing & Publishing Humor’ Category
Hooked On Rhyming (Limerick)
Thursday, September 7th, 2017A Holiday For Haiku? (Limerick)
Monday, April 17th, 2017“Haiku Poetry Day?” That sounds lame!
And redundancy’s surely to blame.
Be concise! That’s no vice;
Won’t “Haiku Day” suffice?
Terse verses deserve a short name.
Happy Haiku Poetry Day! (April 17)
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: COP at the end of any one line
Sunday, January 8th, 2017It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using COP at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to the blues, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best blues-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 22, 2017, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 21, 2017 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
“I’m compelled to write lim’ricks. Can’t stop!
“I keep popping out rhymes till I drop.
“When I drive they continue
“To spew from each sinew…”
“What a screwball excuse!” said the cop.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Limerick Ode To National Proofreading Day (March 8)
Tuesday, March 8th, 2016Today we should celebrate proofreading.
While not fool-proof, it helps avert goof reading.
And, like many, I’m vexed
By typo-strewn text
Found in poetry, fiction, and spoof reading.
Happy National Proofreading Day!
Open Limerick to Super Bowl Fans
Sunday, February 7th, 2016If the game goes from boring to worse,
Don’t bother to sob or to curse.
Sublimation works well.
Be creative as hell:
Snap some photos, sketch, paint, or write verse.
PS: My latest Limerick-Off challenge has just begun. You can find it here.
Limerick Ode To The Pencil Sharpener (3-Verse)
Monday, November 23rd, 2015Did anyone else love sharpening pencils as a child? I was reminded of this favorite ritual of mine, when I learned that today’s the anniversary of John Lee Love’s small, portable “Love Sharpener” patent.
Limerick Ode To The Pencil Sharpener
By Madeleine Begun Kane
As a youngster, I’d take much delight
In my writing tools, shiny and bright.
This is how I’d begin:
I’d stick pencils within
A small sharp’ner, my point-making rite.
How I’d rotate each pencil and stare
At its shavings, while taking great care.
And here’s what I’d ask
In my ritual task:
“Please pencil, don’t break. Don’t you dare!”
Cuz turning too much takes its toll
When the pointiest point is your goal.
But I learned over time:
Pencil points quite sublime
Can be Lovingly carved in that hole.
Anti-Antimeria, No More? (Limerick)
Thursday, November 19th, 2015A Slate language column by Katy Waldman has me re-thinking my anti-antimeria stance. (Antimeria is a “rhetorical device that repurposes a word as a different part of speech than usual.”)
Her column makes some solid points about antimeria’s advantages. In fact, the device may even prove to be handy for humor writing.
Katy’s viewpoint may generate frowns:
Turning nouns into verbs, verbs to nouns
Is extolled by that writer.
Though some may indict ’er,
The thought ain’t as bad as it soun’s.
Post-Paris Depression? (Limerick)
Wednesday, November 18th, 2015Since Paris, it’s hard to be funny.
I’m too bummed to write wit on the money.
But I’d never suggest
That jesting is best
Drawn from joy, cuz I’m rarely THAT sunny.
Anti-Enjambment Limerick Rant
Thursday, November 5th, 2015I’m begging you, please be a lamb
And do NOT use this type of enjamb-
Ment: With syllable hyphen-
Ization, you siphon
Off beauty from verse. It’s a scam.
The Crime Of “Near Rhyme” (Limerick)
Monday, September 28th, 2015When trying to rhyme, a dead end
Just might daunt you and tempt you to bend
Lim’rick rules just a bit,
Giving sticklers a fit.
Don’t descend to near rhyming. Forfend!
Limerick Ode To Bad Poetry Day (August 18)
Tuesday, August 18th, 2015Limerick Ode To “Bad Poetry Day” (3-Verse)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Bad Poetry Day” is today,
But I’d rather keep bad verse at bay.
Writing poorly on purpose
Would seem to usurp us
And lead to poetic decay.
I contend that it’s hard to deny
We write badly enough when we try
To create something clever
Or sweet, or endeavor
To craft something witty or wry.
This very 3-verser of mine
Provides proof of my point. Ev’ry line
Should be thrown in the can.
But I just got a plan:
I shall claim that it’s bad by design.
Sundry Haiku
Saturday, July 11th, 2015I’d like the freedom
to not write haiku today,
but my brain insists.
*****
I am at the stage
where I like being on stage
with or without one.
*****
My near-rhyme rejects
turned limerick leftovers
find homes in haiku.
*****
I’m often impressed
by the drawing power
of unknown painters.
*****
Forgive and forget?
I keep meaning to forgive,
but I forget to.
*****
Your belief system
makes you feel superior?
Then it’s failing you.
*****
My muse goes yonder
as I wander in wonder
at time I squander.
*****
Spiders and crawlers
are welcome in my domain
if sent by Google.
*****
I should have prepared
for extemporization
but ran out of time.
*****
Music needs pauses;
I get restless when a piece
doesn’t have any.
*****
No Reason For Rhyme? (Limerick)
Tuesday, June 2nd, 2015No Reason For Rhyme? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’ve been censured and cautioned to spurn
Burning yearnings to rhyme, as I learn
How to coax some haiku
Into being, but few
Have earned kudos. My critics are stern.
Just One More… (Limerick)
Thursday, May 14th, 2015I’m attempting to check my temptation
To engage in non-stop rhyme creation.
“Buckle down,” my muse cries.
“Make them chuckle! Revise!”
Quick demise to my lim’rick vacation.
Redundant Limerick
Sunday, May 3rd, 2015Redundant Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I avow and aver and declare
And affirm and attest and I swear:
The redundancy flaw
From practicing law
Ain’t impairing my lim’ricks. So there!
Nothing Cryptic Here (Limerick)
Wednesday, April 22nd, 2015Nothing Cryptic Here (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear poet, your verse is opaque.
To decipher it makes my head ache.
Being cryptic’s okay,
If it ain’t just a way
To feign wisdom while being a fake.
Eight Lines On Demand (Updated)
Tuesday, April 21st, 2015A verse of eight lines
has been ordered today.
So a lim’rick won’t fit.
Must I really obey?
I’ve already done five.
Counting this one, it’s six.
Since I’ve traveled this far,
guess I’ll finish, for kicks.
(DVerse Poets asks for 8-line poems today.)
UPDATE: I just realized that today’s double dactyl for John Mortimer (of Rumpole fame) also fits the bill:
Higgledy Piggledy
John Clifford Mortimer
Barrister, Author,
Rumpolian wit.
Bailey, his bailiwick
Prima-facetiously
He and his Horace sure
Loved to acquit.
Fair Game
Monday, April 6th, 2015Fair Game
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I would never purport
to engage in a sport
unless mockery counts;
I do massive amounts.
I make comments in sport
that make some people snort.
I’m unsporting, some claim,
When at pols I take aim.
But those pols are fair game.
Their behavior’s to blame,
And they reap what they sow.
So it’s on with the show.
