The foul smell of a burning cigar
Is so dreadful, it’s something I’d bar
(If I could) ev’rywhere
It’s still legal. So there!
Now you know what I’d do, were I czar.
Archive for the ‘Smoking Humor’ Category
Just In Time For “Cigar Day” (Limerick)
Tuesday, February 27th, 2024Not A High Old Time? (Limerick)
Saturday, April 22nd, 2023“I feel nothing at all,” bitched the bloke,
As the fellow took toke after toke.
It was ganja – top grade,
And as much as he brayed
“Still not high,” he was just blowing smoke.
Kick Butts Day Limerick
Wednesday, March 18th, 2015Today, March 18, is Kick Butts Day.
Kick Butts Day Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Today is the day to kick butts.
No ifs, ands, or buts — smoking’s nuts!
For the cig rut’s a yoke
That can kill you — no joke!
So though quitting’s a drag, show some guts.
I’m Not Hooked On This Patent (Limerick)
Thursday, November 7th, 2013Here’s an invention we could have done nicely without: On November 7, 1876, the cigarette manufacturing machine was patented by Albert H. Hook.
I’m Not Hooked On This Patent (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A patent that now seems obscene
For the cigarette making machine
Has a birthday today.
Albert Hook paved the way,
Hooking people on cigs to make green.
Stop Smoking, Already! (Limerick)
Thursday, May 30th, 2013Here’s a limerick to celebrate World No Tobacco Day. (May 31st)
Stop Smoking, Already!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Please stop smoking already. Don’t dicker.
Tobacco will end your life quicker.
Have a heart, as I air
This advice, cuz I care:
Be kind to your lungs and your ticker.
This Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test
Tuesday, August 7th, 2007According to this odd story, a smoking ban in British pubs has managed to make British bars smell even worse. Apparently, the acrid smell of smoke is a delight compared to all the foul odors smoke used to mask: “stale food and beer, damp, sweat and body odour, drains and – how do you put this nicely – flatulence.”
So what’s the solution? You might think cleaning supplies would be in order. But you would be wrong. Instead, they’re pumping perfume into 2000 pubs — the essence of “leather, freshly cut grass, and ocean breeze fragrances.”
This cries out for a limerick, don’t you think?
This Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The stench of Brit pubs once was hidden
By smoke, but now smoking’s forbidden,
And since folks can’t abide
The foul odor, they hide
It with pumped-in-perfume. I’m not kiddin’.
(You can find more of my food and drink limericks and humor here.)
