Archive for the ‘Poetry & Prompts’ Category
Saturday, May 4th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SLIP or SLIPPED at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DECEIT, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DECEIT-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
BOTTLE, DARK, GUITAR, RELEASE, SCOLD.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa, and use any other variant of the random words. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 2, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 1, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SLIP or SLIPPED-Rhyme Limerick:
The young oboist tried not to slip
While adjusting her reed; a small snip
Was essential — that’s all!
The reed cracked! Did she bawl?
No, she still kept a stiff upper lip.
And here’s my DECEIT-Themed Limerick:
You have taken advantage of me,
Yet again, said a gal to “pal” Leigh.
I’m feeling abused,
Betrayed and misused,
And I’m betting a court will agree.
You’ve frequently borrowed my spouse
To repair things that break in your house.
It appears that “repair”
Is code for “affair.”
How dare you have sex with that louse!
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
Do not bottle up feelings, we’re told,
But that sort of advice leaves me cold.
Were my feelings released
I’d turn into a beast;
An express-it-all, ornery scold.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Advice Humor, Advice Limerick, Battle of the Sexes, Competition Limerick, Deceit Humor, Deceit Limerick, Emotions, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Music Humor, Music Limerick, Oboe Humor, Oboe Limerick, Oboe Reeds, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Honesty Humor, House & Home Humor, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 117 Comments »
Saturday, April 6th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using TACK or ATTACK at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to ANNOYANCES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best ANNOYANCE-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
FALL, FREAKY, GLAMOROUS, LONGER, POINTLESS.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa, and use any other variant of the random words. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 5, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, May 4, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my TACK or ATTACK-Rhyme Limerick:
In the summer, mosquitoes attack.
(Seems my blood, alas, makes a good snack.)
They hang out in our yard,
Hungry, always on guard
For their “meal” to take one step out back.
And here’s my ANNOYANCE-Themed Limerick:
My enjoyment of scat singing’s scant.
I’m averse to Gregorian Chant.
Bagpipe bands drive me mad!
Vuvuzelas are BAD!
This concludes my unmusical rant.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
An ambitious young woman named Kyle
Found her trend-setting efforts a trial.
One fall evening, she freaked
When this fashion news leaked:
Her new gown was no longer in style.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off Post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Bagpipe Humor, Bagpipe Limericks, Competition Limerick, Gregorian Chant, Insect Humor, Insect Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Mosquitoes, Music Humor, Music Limerick, Noise Humor, Noise Limerick Scat Humor, Outdoors Humor, Outdoors Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Seasonal Verse, Vuvuzelas, Writing Prompts, Yard Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Contests, Fashion Humor, Insect Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Outdoors Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Seasons Humor, Trends Humor | 105 Comments »
Saturday, March 9th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SHOT or SHOTS at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PICTURES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PICTURE-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
AMUSING, DOCTOR, NEUROTIC, POSTPONE, VANITY.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on April 7, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 6, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SHOT or SHOTS-Rhyme Limerick:
“That damn bartender’s AWOL,” said Scott
To his prep cook. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”
“Though I’ve never mixed drinks,
I can do it, methinks,
So I gladly will give it a shot.”
And here’s my Picture-Themed Limerick:
“Gotta rush to the bookshop. I’m late!
I am meeting another blind date.
And that chick better look
Like her pic, or I’ll book
It, cuz boy, am I sick of pic-bait!”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
An old woman who loved to complain,
Was neurotic and stubborn and vain.
When her doctor prescribed
Her a cane, the gal gibed:
“That will ruin my look. Where’s your brain?”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Bartender Humor, Bartender Limerick, Battle of the Sexes, Beverage Humor, Blind Date Humor, Competition Limerick, Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, Deception Humor, Doctor Humor, Doctor Limerick, Health Humor, Health Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Vanity Humor, Vanity Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Dating Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Physical Appearance, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Restaurant Reviews & Humor | 122 Comments »
Saturday, February 10th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using WRY or RYE or AWRY at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TEETH, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TOOTH/TEETH-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
LOOK, MESSY, PROOF, RIDDLE, UNFAIR.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on March 10, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, March 9, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my WRY or RYE or AWRY-Rhyme Limerick:
Mary’s husband, an insecure guy,
Often asked her, “Is something awry?”
For he feared that his bride
Would soon cast him aside,
Whenever he heard his wife sigh.
“Nothing’s wrong,” she would always reply.
Until one day, she let out a cry,
Saying (weary with rage)
“That damn query’s not sage!
Ask it just one more time, and you DIE!”
Here’s my TOOTH/TEETH-Themed Limerick:
“On your X-rays, I’m seeing decay,”
Said the dentist. “You’ve quite an array
Of molars that must
Be attended to. Just
Pay this sizeable invoice today.”
And here’s my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
“Your article’s riddled with flaws.
Did you proof this? Please look at this clause:
It runs on forever.
So publish this? Never!
Your writing endeavor? Lost cause!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Competition Limerick, Dental Humor, Dental Limerick, Insecurity Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Teeth Humor, Teeth Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 134 Comments »
Saturday, January 13th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GRAND at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to COACHES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best COACH-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
GRIP, LUSH, PROMISING, SEARCH, YARN.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on February 11, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 10, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my GRAND-Rhyme Limerick:
A grandstanding fellow named Mel
Plays the piano, but not very well.
His recital was panned:
“He abused that poor grand
And deserves a life sentence in hell.”
And here’s my COACH-Themed Limerick:
“Don’t sit like a bump on a log,”
Said the coach. “Shake a leg. Maybe jog.
If you want to get fit,
It’s time to show grit,
And skip all the eggnog and grog.”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
While reciting a tale, Dan said “Darn!
I’ve forgotten the end of this yarn,
Which (I promise) is gripping.
It features unzipping
And (maybe) a cow in a barn.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Coaches Humor, Competition Limerick, Exercise Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Music Humor, Piano Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Reviewers Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Exercise Humor, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Music Reviews, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 121 Comments »
Saturday, December 9th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PERKS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PERK-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
CLUMSY, CONDEMNED, ODDS, SHAKE, WAVES.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 7, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 6, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S-Rhyme Limerick:
“What’s your preference? Bagels or rolls?”
Asked a bakery-bound woman. “My goal’s
A quick breakfast, then work.”
Her new boyfriend, a jerk,
Said “I favor the flavor of holes.”
And here’s my PERK-Themed Limerick:
A cocky young teen liked to smirk
And would frequently act like a jerk.
When ordered to shed
His rudeness, he said:
“I’m rich, and I’m told it’s a perk.”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
A clumsy old fellow named Ken
Was so klutzy that men now and then
Would call him a clod
And condemn him as odd,
While his ex-wife would nod an “amen.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Clumsy Humor, Competition Limerick, Goals Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money Humor, Money Limerick, Perks Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Clumsiness Humor, Contests, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 101 Comments »
Saturday, October 14th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CROW at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to LISTS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best LIST-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
ADVICE, CHECK, NOTES, SLIDER, SNOBBISH
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on November 12, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, November 11, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CROW-Rhyme Limerick:
A know-it-all neighbor will crow
About exploits, vacations, and dough.
When I spot him I try
To sidestep the guy…
Or annoy him with wry tales of woe.
And here’s my LIST-Themed Limerick:
How I love the occasional lift
That can spring out of wordplay; I’ll sift
Through an idiom list
For the whiff of a twist
That might trigger a limerick gift.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
“I’m so sick of this place,” a gal sighed.
“The moms in this playground are snide
And snobbish and rude,
Like that mom with her brood.”
(I advised her to let it all slide.)
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Advice Limerick, Competition Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limericks, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, List Humor, List Limerick, Neighbors Humor, Neighbors Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Wordplay, Writing Prompts
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Neighbors Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 102 Comments »
Saturday, September 16th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using FIND or FINED or DEFINED or REFINED or CONFINED at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to FEET, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best FOOT-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
FAINT, GLARE, CORRUPT, COMB, STREAM.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on October 15, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, October 14, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my FIND or FINED or DEFINED or REFINED or CONFINED-Rhyme Limerick:
Please don’t whine about being entwined
In indictments. You’ve caused your own bind.
In your quest for more wins,
You seem blind to your sins,
But you’ll soon be in prison confined.
And here’s my FOOT/FEET-Themed Limerick:
A bad snowstorm — we can’t use our wheels.
And my boots are a wreck, so the deal’s
That I’ll just have to wait
For the storm to abate.
Until then, I’ll be cooling my heels.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
While I stood on a rather long line,
I felt shaky and faint — too much wine!
Plus the sun-glare was strong,
And I DID smoke that bong.
(I was otherwise perfectly fine.)
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Crime Limerick, Fainting Humor, Footwear Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Lines Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Prison Limerick, Snow Humor, Sun Humor, Weather Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Weather Humor | 115 Comments »
Saturday, August 19th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BOARD or BORED at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PITCH, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PITCH-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: SINK, REFUSE, DAWN, ALARMING, CROWD.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 17, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 16, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my BOARD or BORED-Rhyme Limerick:
When a man reached an online accord
To buy wood, he was certain he’d scored.
But, alas, he had not;
He’d been duped by a bot
That sent rot and was NOT above board.
And here’s my PITCH-Themed Limerick:
Her singing was heartfelt and loud.
(With great volume that gal’s well-endowed.)
But her pitch was so sad,
The conductor (her dad)
Told his fans “It’s my bad,” as he bowed.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
It’s pre-dawn. I’m in front of the sink,
Washing up, while attempting to think
Of a rhyme. But my muse
Yawned and said, “I refuse.
Don’t abuse me. I’m NOT in the pink!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Business Humor, Competition Limerick, Creativity Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Intonation Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Muse Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Musical Verse, Online Shopping, Pitch Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Singing Humor, Writing Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Business Humor, Contests, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Parenting Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Writing & Publishing Humor | 129 Comments »
Saturday, July 22nd, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SUEDE, SWAYED, PERSUADE, or DISSUADE at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TESTS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TEST-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: DUCK, GIFTED, JITTERY, MERGE, STAR.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on August 20, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, August 19, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SUEDE, SWAYED, PERSUADE, or DISSUADE-Rhyme Limerick:
A woman would always wear suede,
Head to toes, both in sun and in shade.
Her spouse fin’ly snapped
Cuz her nighties were napped:
“Our marriage’s fabric is frayed!”
And here’s my TEST-Themed Limerick:
I once took an aptitude test
To learn what I’d likely do best.
The results? Useless crap!
‘Twas all over the map:
“NEVER NAVIGATE!” That’s what it stressed.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
When a jittery mother was told
That her daughter was gifted, she polled
All the parents she knew:
“Could it really be true,
Or do ALL kids get stickers of gold?”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Aptitude Tests, Children Humor, Clothing Humor, Competition Limerick, Education Humor, Exams Humor, Fashion Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Marriage Humor, Navigation Humor, Poetry & Prompts, School Humor, Test Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Children Humor, Clothing Humor, Contests, Education & School Humor, Fashion Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Parenting Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 116 Comments »
Saturday, June 24th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using DRINK or DRINKS at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TASTE, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TASTE-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: ACE, AFRAID, FUNCTION, JADED, UPSET.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on July 23, 2023 , right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 22, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my DRINK/DRINKS-Rhyme Limerick:
A nurse who appears on the brink
Of a breakdown stopped seeing her shrink.
“He’s been making me worse,”
She asserts with a curse.
“Plus he claims that I drove him to drink.”
And here’s my TASTE-Themed Limerick:
A gal with a poor sense of style
Hadn’t bought any clothes in a while.
So she purchased a dress,
A bright red, tasteless mess,
Way too ugly and gross to defile.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
I’m afraid that I’m being replaced
Based on nothing important; I’ve aced
All my functions and more,
Yet they’ve shown me the door.
Their grievance? They claim I eat paste.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Competition Limerick, Drinking Limerick, Fashion Humor, Job Humor, Job Loss Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Mental Health Humor, Nurse Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Shrinks, Taste Humor, Workplace Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Fashion Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Workplace & Career Humor | 131 Comments »
Saturday, May 27th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using LIGHT or DELIGHT at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TEACHERS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TEACHER-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: JOINT, LOVELY, NAP, TAX, CONQUER.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 25, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 24, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my LIGHT/DELIGHT-Rhyme Limerick:
I enjoy writing verse that is light,
Although many poo-poo it as trite.
And I happily slave
Over lim’ricks — my fav.
They’re well worth it, when written just right.
And here’s my TEACHER-Themed Limerick:
The schoolteacher, usually nice,
Could be scary at times – cold as ice.
And her tone, when provoked,
Went from mellow to stoked
With a furious “THAT WILL SUFFICE!”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
“How I long to be able to nap
Just like those who can sleep in a snap.
As for me, there’s no point
In trying. Each joint
In my body shrieks ‘Don’t bother, chap!'”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Education Humor, Light Verse, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Sleep Limerick, Teachers, Teachers Humor, Teachers Limerick, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Education & School Humor, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 135 Comments »
Saturday, May 27th, 2023
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick-Off winners based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in the last Limerick-Off.
Congratulations to MARK TOTTERDELL, who wins the Limerick-Off Award for this funny limerick:
Young Billy, as daft as they come,
Kicked a huge grizzly bear on the bum.
It was done as a dare,
But alas, now the bear
Has a Billy-sized bulge in its tum.
Congratulations to SJAAN VANDENBROEDER, who wins the PREPARATION-Themed Limerick Award for this funny limerick:
Hans had eaten so much he could burst;
All the schnitzel and beer came up first.
He felt somewhat perplexed,
Thinking, “What will come next?”
While preparing himself for the wurst.
Congratulations to SJAAN VANDENBROEDER, who wins the “Random Word Generator” Limerick Award, for a clever limerick which uses at least two of these five words: RATING, BRAVE, BROAD, APPLE, QUARRELSOME.
On her dating app, vying for men,
Joy enhances her profile, and then,
To better compete,
She considers her feet,
And rates herself (broadly) a “ten.”
Congratulations to TONY HOLMES, who wins a Limerick Saga Award, occasionally given to a clever multi-verse limerick.
It began as a light-hearted dare,
That I wouldn’t strip off and walk bare
Down the length of the street
And greet ladies I meet
With, “Good morning! You’re welcome to stare.”
I made sure I was looking my best,
As one does when not wearing one’s vest.
Hearing nothing decried,
As I strode in my pride,
I believe the voyeurs were impressed.
All good things, though, must come to an end,
Lest an overindulgence offend.
It was time to behave.
I had dared and proved brave,
And – who knows? – may have started a trend.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Jean McEwen, Sjaan VandenBroeder, Judy Freed, Lisi Nortman Ardissone, Richard Orr, Bob Turvey, Robert Schechter, Tony Holmes, Tim James, Dave Johnson, Jon Nixon, BillR, J.OConnor, Terry Marter, and Rudy Landesman. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
HONORABLE MENTIONS (DOUBLE DUTY DIVISION: BEAR or BARE-RHYME LIMERICKS THAT ARE ALSO PREPARATION-THEMED LIMERICKS)
Jean McEwen:
Plan to hike in the woods? Then prepare!
Pack some bug spray and trail mix to share.
To survive, if you can,
Make a getaway plan–
For you’re sure to encounter a bear.
Sjaan VandenBroeder:
Ranger Rick tells us how to prepare,
If, while hiking, we meet with a bear:
Wield a stick; jump and holler;
Lift arms (you’ll seem taller).
And if none of that works, try a prayer.
HONORABLE MENTIONS (BEAR or BARE-RHYME DIVISION)
Judy Freed:
My friends sent me out on a dare,
To a beach where the bathers were bare.
My attempt to join in
Left a burn on my skin.
Can’t blame them. I guess it was fair.
Lisi Nortman:
I told Mama “I need to prepare
For a speech at “The Naturist Fair.”
Her response: “Here’s a trick.
Which is easy and quick:
Just picture your audience bare.”
Richard Orr:
A man at a bar, I declare,
Brought his stuffed support animal there.
Friends cried, “Go pet a skunk
Whilst incredibly drunk!”
In response he just grinned, “Hold my bear.”
Bob Turvey:
Camel drivers who got to the Bosphorus,
All shouted out, “Get glue and moss for us!
All our camels are bare
For we’ve sold all their hair
And we hope moss will cover the loss for us.”
Robert Schechter:
The grizzly announced, “I won’t wear
Any clothing, and simply don’t care
If people are rude
When they see I am nude.
As a grizzly, I have to be bear.”
Tony Holmes:
If you camp in the woods, do beware
That you may well encounter a bear.
He’ll have food on his mind –
You’ll be fine if he’s dined,
But if not, you’re legitimate fare.
Tim James:
Ms. Godiva got naked? Big deal.
As I’ve aged, I’ve discovered I feel
That I don’t really care
If she rode around bare.
But her choc’late? That still has appeal.
Dave Johnson:
Away from the usual glare,
That beach is for nudists to share.
But lately some cold
Weather strengthened its hold;
For many, it’s too much to bare.
Jon Nixon:
A tatty and balding old bear,
Said that life hadn’t treated him fair.
He cried, “on my life,
I swear I’m a Steiff,
But my button fell off with my hair!”
BillR:
The National Parks’ Smokey Bear
Has been known to go off on a tear.
He’ll smoke up a storm
To keep himself warm
’Cuz he really has no clothes to wear.
HONORABLE MENTIONS PREPARATION-THEMED LIMERICK DIVISION)
Lisi Nortman:
I soon will be marrying Ken.
I’m counting the minutes till then.
My one sacred vow,
Which I’m pledging right now,
Is “Never plan weddings again!”
Tim James:
“‘Be Prepared’ is our longstanding motto,”
I heard from a Boy Scout named Otto.
“I’ve stocked up on booze,
Which is something I’ll use
If a Girl Scout should want to get blotto.”
J.OConnor says:
The meal was an absolute treat,
A great gastronomical feat.
Took so long to prepare
So it doesn’t seem fair
That it took only minutes to eat.
Terry Marter:
“Be prepared!” I was told as a Scout,
To solve problems when out and about.
But when trouble found Me,
It caused me to pee.
Now my leadership badge is in doubt.
Lisi Nortman:
For tornadoes, our family’s rehearsed.
We all must prepare for the worst.
We put steak in our socks.
This plan really rocks,
Cause the search dogs will find us folks first.
Terry Marter:
Unprepared, he decided last night
To go sailing alone at first light.
A swipe from the boom
Knocked him into the spume
Where he watched his yacht sail out of sight.
HONORABLE MENTIONS (RANDOM WORD GENERATOR LIMERICK DIVISION: RATING, BRAVE, BROAD, APPLE, QUARRELSOME.)
Tim James:
A quarrelsome woman named Tess
Rates my lims a misogynist mess.
She thinks gals in my verse
Are all airheads or worse.
She’s no fan of broad humor, I guess.
Lisi Nortman:
Don’t stand there and casually view it.
The river is broad; go swim through it.
The essence of “brave”
Is how you behave.
If it scares you, no matter what, Do It.
Sjaan VandenBroeder:
Hiring female employees, for Rex,
Is hard. All he thinks of is sex.
With each broad it’s the same,
So instead of his name,
He signs every rating with “x.”
Judy Freed:
I once had a quarrelsome friend.
All her points she would bravely defend.
Till she sat on a spoke,
Swearing it was a joke.
Seems she had the last word in the end.
J.OConnor:
I’m painting with rather broad strokes
When I speak about quarrelsome folks
And I say that their skin
Would not be as thin
If they only learned how to take jokes.
Rudy Landesman:
You say you might leave the Big Apple?
With its problems you don’t want to grapple?
I say, pull up your socks,
Have a bagel with lox.
And be brave. Have some borscht. No, not Snapple!
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win the Limerick-Off Award.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: BillR, Bob Turvey, Dave Johnson, J.OConnor, Jean McEwen, Jon Nixon, Judy Freed, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Lisi Nortman, Mark Totterdell, Richard Orr, Robert Schechter, Rudy Landesman, Sjaan VandenBroeder, Terry Marter, Tim James, Tony Holmes, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Light Verse Contest, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Of The Week, Limerick Writing Contest, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | Comments Off on Limerick-Off Award (509)
Saturday, April 29th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BEAR or BARE at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PREPARATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PREPARATION-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: RATING, BRAVE, BROAD, APPLE, QUARRELSOME.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on May 28, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, May 27, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my BEAR/BARE-Rhyme Limerick:
A generous fellow named Jack
Likes to give folks the shirt off his back.
But he doesn’t stop there;
He’ll undress until bare…
Which alas, got the poor man the sack.
And here’s my PREPARATION-Themed Limerick:
By now, we all know it’s essential
To prepare for a rainstorm torrential.
But at times, though we’re careful,
We end up despairful.
Never lowball a downpour’s potential!
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
A quarrelsome broad known as Maude
Would always refuse to applaud.
And no matter how great
A show was, she’d rate
It a “C,” then berate it as flawed.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Animal Verse, Bears Humor, Competition Limerick, Criticism Humor, Critics Humor, Limerick Challenge, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Preparation Humor, Reviews Humor, Reviews Limerick, Weather Humor, Weather Limerick, Weather Poem, Writing Competitions
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Behavior & Personality, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Reviews, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Theater Reviews, Weather Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 136 Comments »
Saturday, April 1st, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using JUST or UNJUST or ADJUST at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to COURTS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best COURT-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
PLANT, HOBBIES, LEARN, LIKEABLE, WARN.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on April 30, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 29, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my JUST or UNJUST or ADJUST-Rhyme Limerick:
“Adulting” requires hard work;
The mundane kind we’re tempted to shirk.
But do it, we must!
So I try to adjust
And pretend I don’t feel like a clerk.
And here’s my COURT-Themed Limerick, a 2-Verser:
A big gun at a law firm brought suit.
He was gunning for those who pollute.
But his target, alas,
Had a limitless mass
Of moolah to fight the dispute.
That’s not all that his target possessed;
It had friends in the courts and was blessed
With political cronies,
Republican phonies
Who impeded his actions with zest.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
I should take up some hobby this week
To ensure my brain works at its peak.
Learning Greek is too hard!
Planting chard in my yard?
No, my marred mind needs more than a tweak.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Adulting, Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Competition Limerick, Gardening Humor, Hobby Humor, Hobby Limerick, Law Humor, Lawyer Humor, Lawyer Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Litigation Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Workplace & Career Humor, Workplace Limerick, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 125 Comments »
Saturday, March 4th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SCENE or SEEN or OBSCENE at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WHEELS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WHEEL-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
MEAL, FAN, WATCH, BUSINESS, SLEEP
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on April 2, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SCENE or SEEN or OBSCENE-Rhyme Limerick:
A young fellow, no more than nineteen,
Would steal golf carts and often be seen
Careening around
On his campus. He’d found
A trump card: His dad was the Dean.
And here’s my WHEELS-Themed Limerick:
When I ask for the wheel, you refuse me.
“Backseat driver,” you say? Don’t accuse me!
I’m in front, so your claim
Is abusive and lame.
It’s so foolish, you almost amuse me.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
Ever been to a bus’ness lunch? Yuk!
You’ve one scheduled? You’re stuck? Well, good luck!
I’m no fan of such meals,
Where you’re s’pposed to make deals,
Watch your manners, and NEVER say “Fuck!”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Business Humor, Business Limerick, Competition Limerick, Dining Humor, Driving Humor, Driving Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Golf Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Poetry Prompt, Theft Humor, Theft Limerick, Wheels Humor, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Business Humor, Car & Driving Humor, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 148 Comments »
Monday, February 20th, 2023
Using the poetry prompt “align,” I turned my haiku into a limerick:
A prompt’s been assigned.
Should Rhymezone-dot-com be mined?
My rhymes are aligned.
***
A poetry prompt’s been assigned.
Rhymezone tempts me with rhymes to be mined.
I could write some haiku,
But I’ve lim’ricks to do.
Must ensure that my rhymes are aligned.
Tags: Haiku & Senryu, Haiku Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Prompt Humor, Rhyme Humor, Writing Haiku, Writing Prompts
Posted in Haiku & Senryu, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Writing & Publishing Humor | Comments Off on Aligning My Verse (Haiku and Limerick)
Saturday, February 4th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using NET at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to CLASS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best CLASS-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
POLICE, LONG, PUSHY, ELITE, MATCH.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on March 5, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, March 4, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my NET-Rhyme Limerick:
Though you claim that you’re sorry, it’s clear
That you’re saying it just out of fear,
And you’re hoping to net
Some forgiveness. Bad bet!
You are poor at appearing sincere.
And here’s my CLASS-Themed Limerick:
If you’re totally lacking in class
And you always behave like an ass,
Then kindly don’t whine
And call someone a swine
Who’s responded in kind with some sass.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
A pushy young fellow named Pete
Had a longing to join the elite.
He was far from a saint,
And showed little restraint,
So Peter’s now under concrete.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Apology Limerick, Class Humor, Class Limerick, Competition Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Sincerity, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 141 Comments »
Saturday, January 7th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using RUDE, RUED or ROOD at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DESTRUCTION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DESTRUCTION-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: STRIDE, HANDY, PUNISH, FLY, BAIL.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on February 5, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, February 4, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my RUDE, RUED or ROOD-Rhyme Limerick:
I am stunned by the way you behave.
It appears you were raised in a cave.
You’ve a terrible tude
And you’re crude, lewd, and rude.
So there’s only one word for you: KNAVE!
And here’s my DESTRUCTION-Themed Limerick:
Here’s a factoid not everyone knows:
Perfectionist Brahms alas chose
To destroy some great stuff
He thought NOT up to snuff.
How I wish that he di’n’t decompose!
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
I tried to play “stride,” but I failed.
My small hands lacked the reach, so I bailed.
But I still remain sold
On stride pianists of old,
Whose fingers would fly, as they wailed.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Brahms Humor, Brahms Limerick, Competition Limerick, Composer Humor, Composer Limerick, Composers, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Music, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Pianist Humor, Pianist Limerick, Piano Humor, Piano Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Rudeness Humor, Rudeness Limerick, Stride Pianist, Stride Piano, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 173 Comments »
Saturday, December 10th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BLUE or BLEW at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to RELIGION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best RELIGION-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: NAME, NAUSEOUS, PROFIT, TEASE, SILVER.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 8, 2023, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 7, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my BLUE or BLEW-Rhyme Limerick:
A litigious old fellow was blue.
His friends (he had only a few)
Asked “Why the bad mood?”
The response from that dude
Was “I’ve run out of people to sue!”
And here’s my RELIGION-Themed Limerick:
A man of the cloth would not share
His frank with his date at the fair.
“That’s unfair,” she cried out.
“I gave you my kraut.
So canoodle tonight? Not a prayer!”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
There is someone I could (but won’t) name
Who makes me feel nauseous. My aim
Isn’t testing or teasing;
He’s just so displeasing,
I’d rather not add to his fame.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Law Humor, Law Limerick, Lawyer Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Litigation Humor, Litigation Limerick, Litigation Poem, Mood Humor, Mood Limerick, Mood Swings, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Dating Humor, Friendship Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Religion Verse | 187 Comments »
