Archive for the ‘Physical Appearance’ Category
Tuesday, July 29th, 2008
Please stay tuned for a big announcement, which is coming in the next day or so. But in the meantime, I’ve been prompted to write about getting older. So here’s my Gray Matters limerick:
Gray Matters
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though young when I started to gray,
I refused to say, “Gray, go away!”
In the decades gone by
I have never used dye.
Mess with nature? My answer is “Nay!”
My best wishes to LA’ers who’ve been through an earthquake today. Fortunately, so far at least, the damage hasn’t been bad. I still have vivid memories of the really scary 1971 LA earthquake.
Tags: Aging Limerick, Getting Older Verse, Gray Hair, Hair Dye Humor
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Limericks, Physical Appearance | 12 Comments »
Friday, August 24th, 2007
If you’re ever in Scottsdale, Arizona and feel the need to buy jeans, prepare yourself for a scary rear view:
Worried that new pair of high-fashion jeans may just make your butt look fat? Now shoppers in one upscale Scottsdale store [The Hub] can check it out for themselves before someone else makes the observation – using the Butt Cam, a camera positioned just so that’s connected to a video screen on a dressing room wall.
And if that doesn’t sound bad enough:
The setup also allows Hub employees to display views of their more confident shoppers on flat-screen TVs behind the cash registers for all to see.
This brings me to my latest limerick:
No Butt Cams For Me — No Ifs, Ands, Or Buts
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Butt Cam sure sounds rather crass,
But it gives you a view of your ass
While you’re trying on jeans.
And you know what that means?
It should tell almost all: “Take a pass!”
(You can find more of my fashion and shopping humor here.)
Tags: Butt Cam, Butt Camera, Buying Jeans, Clothes Shopping, Dressing Room Cameras, Fashion Satire, Scottsdale Arizona, Shopping Humor, Video Screens
Posted in Business Humor, Fashion Humor, Limericks, Marketing Humor, Physical Appearance, Polls, Shopping Humor | 3 Comments »
Saturday, March 24th, 2007
It’s Not That I Don’t Like Movies, But…
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I prefer to catch movies at home,
Not in theaters where tall fellows roam.
There they prowl, on the hunt
For the seat right in front,
To bestow a great view of their dome.
Update: April 23 is National Movie Theater Day.
Tags: Appearance Humor, April Holidays, Films, Height Challenged, Height Humor, Movie & Play Humor, Movie Theater Day, Movies, National Movie Theater Day, Odd Holidays, Petite, Theater Humor, Theatres
Posted in Entertainment Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Movie & Play Humor, Odd Holidays, Physical Appearance, Recreation & Fun Humor | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, March 13th, 2007
Belated Apology
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Your apology’s rather belated,”
Said the gal to a fellow she hated.
“Your delay makes me fear
That it isn’t sincere—
You still had your hair when we dated!”
*****
UPDATE: October 14 is Be Bald And Free Day.
Tags: Apologies Humor, Baldness Humor, Be Bald And Free Day, Dating Satire, Hair Humor, Men and Women Verse, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Romance Humor
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Apology Humor, Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Dating Humor, Limericks, Odd Holdays, Physical Appearance, Relationship Humor | 3 Comments »
Monday, January 15th, 2007
Healthy, Or Half-Baked?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My spouse likes to lie in the sun,
Absorbing those rays just for fun.
As for me, I hate sweat.
I’d not bask on a bet.
It’s unsav’ry to bake till you’re done.
(My health humor is collected here.)
UPDATE: July 3rd is Stay Out Of The Sun Day.
Tags: Health Risks, July Holidays, Odd Holidays, Skin Care, Skin Damage, Stay Out Of The Sun Day, Sun Bathing Humor, Wrinkles Poem
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Health & Medical Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Physical Appearance, Recreation & Fun Humor | 6 Comments »
Monday, December 11th, 2006
What A Card!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I haven’t been carded in years,
But the last time it brought me to tears.
I was laughing, I mean:
To be seen as a teen
By a fellow whose folks were my peers.
Tags: Age Requirement, Aging Humor & Verse, Aging Limerick, Appearance Humor, Bars, Carding, Drinking Limerick, Law Humor, Liquor Humor
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Food & Drink Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Physical Appearance, Seniors Poetry | 6 Comments »
